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I think I like girls

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
For the past year I have realised I am attracted to other girls. I really like guys, but at the back of my mind I'm into girls a bit. Lately I have began to like a girl at school. I don't really talk to her that much but I talk to her occasionally as she's in a group of girls I hang around with in school. I've heard she used to like a girl a few months ago. Anyway, I don't know what to do. I do like her, but I suppose I'm scared of what people will think. I've always been like that. I can't really say I'm bi until I have an experience, I guess. I don't like the idea of going further than kissing with a girl either. Noone knows I like her, except a lad mate of mine. He doesn't know her or anything, but he said I should tell her or at least ask her if she likes me. But I don't even talk to her much. I think I should just forget about it. I'm just confused (I think) and it will probably go away soon. Hmm.. what do you think? I probably haven't explained myself properly.

I think this should be in "Relationships".

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Easyiest way to work out if your confused is to experiement, I mean everyone goes to a point in there life where they wonder "do i like the same sex" etc and get conffused, Some turn out they're gay, Bi some turn out to just be a phase but the only way you can work out if you like girls or not is to go further, if you leave it you will never probably know.

    MY advice, Tell her, least the pressure will be of your chest, and who cares if your into girls, you are who you are. I can understand people might be wary about it in school but Sociaty now adays are becoming more accepting of same sex relationships, and most people don't care.

    Good luck
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I agree that experimentation would be the way forward, but maybe in a situation less risky than this. It might be best to admire this girl from afar but go for it if yourself attracted to another girl (outside of school perhaps) where you felt more confident about the outcome.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    agree with the post above BUT, remember that schools are ruthless and it could make a bad situation if people find out.

    If I was you i'd try to become her friend and see if she shows signs of liking you. You could become friends and then ask her what all that was about when she liked that other girl.

    Yeah ... a girl that went to the school i was at admitted she liked some other girl...and to be blunt, that made life pretty shit for her from what i could see :p

    Might be an idea to keep it subtle and just try to get to know her first instead of just coming out with it!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was with my first girlfriend while i was in school, she wasnt from there though, an although i told a few close friends, i would never of dreamt of telling everyone untill last year of 6th form, because i just knew i'd get a hard time for it. I think you shouldnt tell this girl until you know her a little better, if your still attracted to girls there's plenty out there that arent from your school.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nothing wrong with liking girls at all, but I would be careful when you come out and in what way you do it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you like who you like, if it worth telling them you like them in a physical way ie. you think she might be the same, tell her

    you like who you like, if you reckon they might like you, go for it!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Theres a 3rd former at my school who has come out and said she likes two girls in her class and is bisexual. The girls are, I dont think mocking her as such (I'm not really sure) but more scared of her persistance and forwardness. They are only 13-14. But shes still got another 4years to go through school, so yea, just be careful of who and how you tell.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i had crushes on both sexes at school, especially my female art teacher :heart:
    It could mean youre bisexual, it might not. I went through phases. I thought i was bisexual once, and at one point I even thought I might be a lesbian, but I never went "all the way" with a woman and now i identify as being straight.
    If I were you, id just wait and see how things develop. You dont have to label yourself as any particular sexuality, although theres nothing wrong with defining yourself as bisexual either - a lot of people are, and know they are from a young age.
    Has this girl given you any indication she might be interested or even bisexual/gay herself?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah I don't want people to know what I am just now. The girl in question has give me some glances sometimes, I catch her looking sometimes. That could be anything.. she might not even like me. She might think I'm ugly or something. I have liked girls before but I haven't like them for long, just for like a week or something.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    __tink wrote:
    Yeah I don't want people to know what I am just now.
    Just take your time then until yu fully make up your mind - you still sound a touch unsure.
    __tink wrote:
    The girl in question has give me some glances sometimes, I catch her looking sometimes. That could be anything.. she might not even like me. She might think I'm ugly or something. I have liked girls before but I haven't like them for long, just for like a week or something.

    Try getting to know her as a friend - the closer you get, the more you'll be able to find out about her.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sorry to go slightly off topic but I'm honestly amazed how many people say that their schools wouldn't accept it?! My school might of been crap (well...yeah it was really) but thats one thing I'm proud of, our pupils were totally open to whatever sexuality peple were. We had some very obvious gays, bi's, lesbians, straights... and we all treated each other the same. I never realised we were such a minority...

    I do remember though, one lad joined the school and reacted badly to it, calling two girls "dirty lesbians". Needless to say, no one was particularly keen on him for it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its difficult to say about my school because no-one has officially *come out* though there are rumours.
    From being at the school for 4 years, I would say that generally, as a whole, the student body would accept anyone who came out apart from the odd person here and there. The deal with the 3rd former however, I think its just some of her classmates who are scared because they dont really understand that shes so comfortable with it, and maybe because of their age, a lot of them just dont have a level of maturity high enough to accept it. But dont quote me :chin: :razz:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    my school was funny. I remember the one gay lad in the year came out after being quite popular amongst the girls in year 7. Even now my mate has people say oh yeah you turned so and so gay..." so in a way I felt more sorry for the ex girlfriends!


    I'd go along the be mates thing too because thats what i would do if it was a guy and it was me! Why should it be any different?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jowolvo wrote:
    I'd go along the be mates thing too because thats what i would do if it was a guy and it was me! Why should it be any different?

    Very sound advice there! You dont sound sure of your sexuality yet, but you dont have to decide know, just see how things go. Most people go through this at some point in there lives. School can be a cruel place to come if you come out, there where a couple of people in my year who came out in year -11 or sixth form and had the shit taken out of them because of it. Teenagers just dont like people to be different espcially if their not sure of their own sexuality.
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