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age for men to loose virginity?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am 20 year male, almost 21 and am a virgin. I've had one serious relationship which never lead to sex and have dated after that and never really persued or gave it that much attention. Had many opportunities, but to me sex is more than just sleeping with someone to fulfill your desires..and should have right meanings with it...

Its hard to be a guy and be a virgin at almost 21..its looked down on now a days?

Should i be worried?
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    19 and still going strong :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dont worry about it, its pretty cool that your holding out for someone special. At least you know it will be meaningful.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why does it matter what anyone else thinks, if you are happy with what you are doing?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if your happy, its not a problem.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know a guy who is 19 and going strong, he said he wants to wait till he loves someone properly and they love him....and they both want it till he does. Nothing wrong with it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am 20 year male, almost 21 and am a virgin. I've had one serious relationship which never lead to sex and have dated after that and never really persued or gave it that much attention. Had many opportunities, but to me sex is more than just sleeping with someone to fulfill your desires..and should have right meanings with it...

    Its hard to be a guy and be a virgin at almost 21..its looked down on now a days?

    Should i be worried?

    You have no reason to worry at all, there are more guys out there then you think who believe that sex is not just about fufilling your desires. Both me (20) and my other half(26) where virgins before we meet, as before I meet him I had never had a serious relationship and he had never meet someone he really cared about.

    I must admit that I was a little surprised when he told me his was still a virgin at the age of 26, but when he explained that it was because he was waiting for that special person, I could understand where he was coming from as I too did not believe that you should just sleep with someone for the sake of it.

    So as i said at the beginning you have nothing to worry about, if you find the right person they will understand.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It is looked down upon by most people. Most people except friends will tease you for it and even then its only cause you are their friend they don't. If you are happy with it then there is nothing wrong but then if its because you can't find someone who you love and trust enough then obviously its a problem. Should you change cause the world is evil like that, probably not but then its tough when you will slowly feel more and more left out and alienated
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    who cares?!

    its not a race
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was 31. Not by choice - but that was the way it happened.

    It didn't bother anyone else. It bothered me some at the time, but hey-ho, there are more important things to worry about. In retrospect, I shouldn't have been upset about it.

    It was finally the right time, with the right person.

    So don't be worried.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am 20 year male, almost 21 and am a virgin. I've had one serious relationship which never lead to sex and have dated after that and never really persued or gave it that much attention. Had many opportunities, but to me sex is more than just sleeping with someone to fulfill your desires..and should have right meanings with it...

    Its hard to be a guy and be a virgin at almost 21..its looked down on now a days?

    Should i be worried?


    u shud b worried mate. come on get laid :banghead:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sauce wrote:
    u shud b worried mate. come on get laid :banghead:

    nd u sud b woried 2 m8. i here stoopid peeps dnt lst lng out thre.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    tbh, sex is important, until you've had it.
    One night stands are overrated and sex in a meaningful relationship is a lot better.
    All one night stands are is an ego boost imo.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's certainly true that a lot of pressure is applied on both men and women these days to lose their V-plates. Whilst I was at college, I was extremely tempted on many occasions. I hated being a virgin back then, I perceived that everyone was having sex but me, an untrue perception. I turned 20 at the end of last year. Earlier this year, I met someone extremely special and after around two months, I lost my virginity to her. All I can say is I'm glad that I waited. I know now that, had I done it earlier and with someone else, I would have almost certainly regretted it to this day. My advice would therefore be, don't rush to lose your virginity and don't listen to those who say you should have lost it by now.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    icey wrote:
    tbh, sex is important, until you've had it.
    One night stands are overrated and sex in a meaningful relationship is a lot better.
    All one night stands are is an ego boost imo.

    In your opinion, that is.

    Two people liking each other doesn't mean good sex follows, and that's especially true for guys.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Spliffie wrote:
    Two people liking each other doesn't mean good sex follows, and that's especially true for guys.
    But even bad sex in a loving relationship is beautiful thing. Some people say it's better than good sex, I say it's like comparing sound to colour
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I lost mine at the back of sainsburys in the car wash section oops.

    What I realised is you shouldn't need to feel pressured to have sex. As someone else said it aint that big a deal, just wait and it will come.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    But even bad sex in a loving relationship is beautiful thing. Some people say it's better than good sex, I say it's like comparing sound to colour

    All depends on the individual.

    For example...what kind of relationship I have with a girl alters the whole "mood", but it doesn't determine how much i enjoy it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am 20 year male, almost 21 and am a virgin. I've had one serious relationship which never lead to sex and have dated after that and never really persued or gave it that much attention. Had many opportunities, but to me sex is more than just sleeping with someone to fulfill your desires..and should have right meanings with it...

    Its hard to be a guy and be a virgin at almost 21..its looked down on now a days?

    Should i be worried?

    I was 21 before I slept with someone. Like me, you should not be worried at all - from what you have wrote you are waiting for all the right reasons. I think it only bothers people if deep down they are actually covering up deeper issues, such as fear of intimacy, or lack of self worth etc. If this is the case then waiting for the right person is exactly what you should be doing anyway. Someone who really cares about you and your feelings will make all of those issues irrelevant, rather than someone who just wants a good performance at the time.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As a 19yr old female V plate holder, it's refreshing to hear there's so many male V PLate holders out there...
    A mate of mine (a guy) said that guys my age aren't gonna wait to have sex.. well, it proves that theory wrong, doesn't it? :thumb: :p

    Ilora x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There's nothing wrong with waiting if that's what you want to do.

    But there is no great moral superiority for those who waited. I went out and lost it to the first person who came along, and it was great. She happened to stay and wait and become the wife, but I wasn't madly in love with her then.

    I don't think there's any superiority in waiting, and I don't think there's anything wrong with sex for the sake of sex. I've had some brilliant sex with people I couldn't really care about too much, except she had a nice arse and tits. So what?
  • SkiveSkive No discipline. No morality. No respect. New ForestPosts: 15,263 Skive's The Limit
    I lost it when I wanted to lose it. It was when I'd had enough of wanking, not becaue of my mates egging me on.

    Sex in a proper relationship is excellent, but sex with a stranger is exciting even if it's no thtat good.

    I can pull women and have a one night stand anytime I want but Im still leaning about relationships.
    Weekender Offender 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sex is fun, and as long as ur first time is fun with sum1 u at least like then, i say thts a good way to lose ur virginity. if ur paranoid u shud get it outta the way and then u can relax. plus when u meet sum1 u do love u can impress them experience and skill. id hate to meet my soulmate and dissapoint with poor lovemaking. so dont make a big deals, sex is about good experiences. and u enjoy the first time u make love with the special sum1 out there for u cos of that experience and skill gained making u more confident and self assured.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    19 here and havnt. Do feel kind of pressured sometimes though. Ive had chances but didnt fancy losing it to a short term fling or a one night stand.
  • the_Paranoid_bunnythe_Paranoid_bunny Rampant Poster Posts: 487 Boards Initiate
    I'm 22 and still a virgin. I don't think it's a problem at all. When you're younger it's a bit like sex is the ultimate conquest of life, and all your peers go on about how great it is...

    But the friends I have now have started to have serious relationships, and they all wish they'd waited for that special someone before having sex (except for the ones who are still virgins, and that's a lot of them btw). Tbh, I think it's much better to wait for the right time - it just makes it a lot more special that way. :cool:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sex is fun, and as long as ur first time is fun with sum1 u at least like then, i say thts a good way to lose ur virginity. if ur paranoid u shud get it outta the way and then u can relax. plus when u meet sum1 u do love u can impress them experience and skill. id hate to meet my soulmate and dissapoint with poor lovemaking. so dont make a big deals, sex is about good experiences. and u enjoy the first time u make love with the special sum1 out there for u cos of that experience and skill gained making u more confident and self assured.
    Hi freedom_fighter. I'm new as well but welcome anyway :wave:
    I'd just want to ask you not to use text talk here as it is harder to read and people here in general just don't use it. There are other reasons which you can read up on the good manners guide. -Thanks and see you around. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am in two minds becasue I am happy to have had sex and lost my v, I have enjoyed it mostly but all the times I did it , it wasn't with some1 I'd been with for ages, I didn't have a real serious relationship with them, so I haven't had that special sex you can't when your both in love. Also, sex can cause you more trouble then you ever guessed.

    take it as you feel it, if you want it then do it, if not then wait. Both sides of the coin have thier drawbacks.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    bluewisdom wrote:
    Hi freedom_fighter. I'm new as well but welcome anyway :wave:
    I'd just want to ask you not to use text talk here as it is harder to read and people here in general just don't use it. There are other reasons which you can read up on the good manners guide. -Thanks and see you around. :)

    Well done. I guarantee you that you will stop correcting people. I would gladly correct text talk if it wasn't neverending. For every text talk eliminated, another one is born.

    It makes me crazy. The new users should be forced to read the good manners guide when they register.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was 18 when i lost mine, i had been in relationships before then but i had never really felt comfortable. Now that im with my current girlfriend i feel 100% relaxed about everything with her. I wouldnt really worry about it, sex with someone you love and can talk to is great :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My bf was 19 when he lost his (but it wasn't to me)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Im 16 and a virgin. Im in college and it does seem like loads of people r having sex except me? No-one knows im a virgin i dont tlk about it, and im kinda embarrassed. I wanna have sex - not from peer pressure because a lot of my close mates r virgins. But however all of them have had boyfriends for longer then like 1 month - which i havent (ive had short relationships and relationships where most contact is thru text) - i seem to get so close to guys then it all falls apart and im so afraid that im gonna get it wrong i go all shy and the guys dont like it. This topic gets me down a lot. Every1 says how pretty i am - im a size 10 clothes i dont think there is anything wrong with me?

    I am worried but what u have all sed makes me feel better, but i still want to have a boyfriend and if i feel he is worthy :p then to have sex with him

    Thanks
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