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Travelling
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok, so I wanna go travelling.
I know loads of people say that but I'm really serious about it. I've been thinking about it for ages and have planned out where I want to go, and also have saved up a fair bit of money for it, and will have even more by the time I want to go, in April 2006 ish.
The only thing is, I don't want to go on my own.
A lot of my friends are too tied down with boyfriends to go travelling. A lot of them say they want to, but I don't think they're actually serious about it, like they havent started saving money or anything like I have.
I spend a silly amount of time on this website www.gapyear.com and its really good. They have a section on there called 'Travelmates' which I'm always looking on and basically its just a messageboard full of people (mainly girls) who seem just like me, they want to go but have nobody go to with and aren't sure about going alone.
I'm seriously considering replying to someones message on there now because I'm really wanting to go. I was just wondering what everyone thinks about this? If you did start talking to someone off there how many times do you think you'd have to meet them in real life before you went travelling? What if you went and then realised you couldn't stand them? Or what if none of that would happen and I'm just totally missing out on an opportunity...
Does anyone know anyone who has met a travelling buddy in that way?
Basically I just want advice :-/
I know loads of people say that but I'm really serious about it. I've been thinking about it for ages and have planned out where I want to go, and also have saved up a fair bit of money for it, and will have even more by the time I want to go, in April 2006 ish.
The only thing is, I don't want to go on my own.
A lot of my friends are too tied down with boyfriends to go travelling. A lot of them say they want to, but I don't think they're actually serious about it, like they havent started saving money or anything like I have.
I spend a silly amount of time on this website www.gapyear.com and its really good. They have a section on there called 'Travelmates' which I'm always looking on and basically its just a messageboard full of people (mainly girls) who seem just like me, they want to go but have nobody go to with and aren't sure about going alone.
I'm seriously considering replying to someones message on there now because I'm really wanting to go. I was just wondering what everyone thinks about this? If you did start talking to someone off there how many times do you think you'd have to meet them in real life before you went travelling? What if you went and then realised you couldn't stand them? Or what if none of that would happen and I'm just totally missing out on an opportunity...
Does anyone know anyone who has met a travelling buddy in that way?
Basically I just want advice :-/
Post edited by JustV on
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Comments
Good luck, and I think you should just go for it!
I chose to travel alone this summer, and this has its pros and cons; I could do what I wanted, when I wanted, I got to know far more fellow travellers and locals than I think I would have done had I been with a friend, as I appeared more approachable as a lone traveller and I was more motivated to start up conversations and develop friendships, some of which were solid enough to warrant travelling together for a week or so before our itinteraries parted. However, I was also more vulnerable to crime (although I had no trouble in the 3 months I was away) and things can get a bit lonely from time to time.
Travelling with a friend/travel buddy,as I did the summer before, also has its pros and cons. THE CHOICE OF FRIEND IS SO IMPORTANT!! You're going to be spening a LOT of time with this person, and I don't know about you bu even my best friend and I get on each other's nerves when we spend too much time together. You'll also be in stressful situations as I said, and have to make joint decisions about how to get to places; if there's something you're uncomfortable with, like an overnight bus, you have to trust that your travel buddy won't push you into it and will be willing to compromise. In some ways travelling with someone you haven't known for ages can make this easier, as you're always willing to compromise more out of courtesy with people you're not totally comfortable with. But if you don't know them inside out you can't be sure that the person who was in the coffee shop with you for a meet-up before leaving is going to be the same person that comes out in stressful or tricky situations. She/he may be a great safety-conscious friend during the day, but as soon as a member of the oppsite sex chats her up in a bar, they're off to bed with them leaving you on your own in a foreign bar, with no idea of their safety/how to get home, etc. It's a funny balance to have to strike but it can be really important.
Personally I'd be wary of internet travel buddies, not necessarily because ofthe danger factor, but because choosing a travel partner is a lot like choosing a husband - you gotta be certain that they're right for you, and I'm not convinced that finding someone on the net who's perfect for you to travel with, likes doing the same kind of stuff, wants to go to the same places, AND lives near enough for you to get to know before leaving, is going to be very easy.
If your friends can't travel in April, can you find another time when you can both go? Or maybe choose someone who you know pretty well already and is reliable but isn't part of your close circle of friends? Maybe this is a chance to develop a new friendship?
I've travelled both with friends and on my own and to be honest travelling alone was more interesting...they say you travel alone to meet people...and it's true.
Finding a travel companion on a message board could work out great, but then on your first night/hostel you might end up looking around and seeing all the independent backpackers doing just fine on there own and want to join in on the fun...worse case seranio your travel-internet-friend could turn out to be a wanker...
Maybe skimming the posts on
Lonely Planet
And/Or
Aardvark
Might help a little....
What if your 'travel buddy' turns out to be a complete wanker? I just think that travelling with someone else, particularly if you're moving around the place, just ties you down and you can't follow your own agenda unless it fits in with the other person's.
I travelled around Europe for 2 months on my own. The only night where I didn't meet people or didn't go out with some new people I'd just met was my first night. Every night after that, I met people who I either continued on with or met randomly in another part of Europe. Please don't think that if you travel alone, you'll be a loner for the duration of your trip. If you make a little effort and go and talk to people - you'll have a blast.
Whereabouts are you planning on going to?
I really don't think I can go on my own. I don't think Im that confident. I mean I'm a lot better that I used to be and have been working abroad by myself for two Summers but that was different cos I actually had a job to go to then. I'm quite bubbly and friendly and I can chat to anyone but i still don't think I'd want to actually go on my own in the first place.
The idea of an internet person sounded really good but I do understand what people are saying, like you might really not be able to stand them, but I reckon even if you can't...at least you could go with them some of the way?
Theres no chance I can get any of my friends to come with me either, I know none of them are actually serious about going and I well want to get out of here and go in April, I dont want to wait any longer.
I'm planning on heading to Australiaaa (suprise?) and then to New Zealand and I really want to go to Japan at some point too! I'm dying to visit Tokyo and places.
Hmmm what to dooo
When I travelled in South America for example about 9-in-every-10 people I meet were idiots. For example I met a lot of people who just bragged about how many great drugs they'd taken in S America. I think South America attracts this type of traveller.
Don't get me wrong, I did meet some fantastic people when I was travelling. Its just they were the minority.
True but something I've learned over the years is that before you can be comfortable in other people's company, you should be comfortable with your own. I found travelling alone fantastically liberating and I was fine on my own (partly because I'm somewhat of a polyglot which does help).
You've got to ask yourself one thing. Why do these people who post on that message board have no-one to travel with in the first place?
Do I really need to spell this out?
Maybe because they have no friends to begin with? I'm not shitting on anyone who uses that message board (well, I am I guess) but that was the first thing that occurred to me. Travel alone, it's the best way to be.
Have a look at this - http://www.overlandclub.com/tourinfo.asp?TourID=33
Or alternatively if your going to australia you can get the backpackers bus thing i've toally forgotten the name of it - and you will meet people to travel with along the way.
I went travelling after my A-levels and did some by myself and some with friends - though I didn't have any major arguments with the friends or anythign and we were pretty much in agreement about everything I still felt very claustrophobic being with two other people nearly every hour of every day.
I had a fantastic time when I went traveling with a mate of mine, we still met lots of people but there was always someone around to help carry stuff, or look out for you.
And go to South Africa!
xxxxxxx
I suppose that could be a thing for some people. However I do honestly think there'd be a lot of people out there like me who can't find someone to go travelling with, cos they don't have like minded friends, and believe me its not as if I don't have friends in the first place.
I've decided I definitely dont want to go alone so I suppose the gapyear message board is the only choice I've really got!. hmm.
Well it's not.
There's a company called BusAbout who do, funnily enough, Bus trips round Europe. Thing is, you can get on and off when you like. You buy a ticket valid for x amount of months and the bus stops in loads of places and you can stay as long in a place as you like. It's full of crazy Australians and I met a load of really cool people as the bus seemed to follow the same route as me around Europe. The messageboards are not your only option. I know you've kinda got your heart set on it but I can't advocate strongly for travelling alone.
Ooh thanks for that link! It sounds really interesting and I've never heard of it before, I've never really thought about travelling Europe cos its always been farther away I've thought of. Shall read that site more in detail!