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'Seeing' to Boyf/Girlf
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi, Ive been seeing a bloke on my course at uni for about 3 weeks, its all going well (I think!!) but we havent had the boyfriend/girlfriend discussion yet and he doesnt want to tell anyone else on the course yet too...do you reckon this means he doesnt want a realtionship or he just wants to take things slowl?? Dont want to push the subject but really wanna know!!!!
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just enjoy what you've got, don't try and ruin it by rushing things.
He defo wants to be slow in my opinion.
That's what I did when I was seeing my x (I know, that sounds bad as he's my x now, but that was over different reasons - we're still mates)
Anyways, I didn't feel comfortable everyone knowing about 'us' till I got use to it myself. Felt that if people found out at the start of the relationship, it would jinx it.
You've only been with him for 3 weeks, as lucifer devil said, enjoy what you've got now. Don't spoil it by getitng heavy so soon.
It was just the same with me and my boyfriend, I did not what to jinx are relationship, as even thought I have had lots of male friends over the years I had never had a boyfriend. My boyfriend also had simular experiances, he had been out with girls before but had never really had a girlfriend before, as he just never really found anyone he really liked.
So the fact that we have been going out now for nearly a year when most of the other girls he meet he only wentout with them a couple of times for drinks make me feel really special and proves that if you wait a few more weeks then it might just work.
We had been going out for about a month before he first use the girlfriend word and we had know each other for a month before we even went out for the first time. So hang on in there.
Ive been seeing a really nice guy for about a month now, we have been on a few dates, hes wanted to pay for it all but i said no as i dont want him to think that im just using him. He initiated a hug the first time we met but i was shy and i sure he was too so that was it, next time we met we went back to his house to watch a dvd and had more hugs, but this time i initiated a kiss and a bit of touching, which seemed to go well. Also met his mum that night and he later told me that she said i seemed a nice girl lol. Anyway he eventually met my friends when we went out on a group date, they all liked him but said he was a bit shy, thats fair enough it was the first time he met them. Ive asked him to a party i have soon and he said hed come, which is great, but i feel as though somethings missing, its always me that seems to initiate talking, or kissing or anything like that, am i looking for too much? all i want is for him to be a bit spontaneous and kiss me/grope my arse or something just out of the blue, maybe hes just not like that, i dont know. ive even hinted that he should come and entertain me and all he said was it sounds like fun..... ugh. is it me? or maybe hes just shy? or not interested? or .. i dont know...
Sorry for the long winded post/rant
any advice?
Maybe he feels intimidated because the first time when he tried to hug you you pulled away. Just drop subtle hints that you look a guy to be spontaneous and i'm sure he'll pcik up on it.
Dancing ability, Singing ability, ability to hold drink, and it just goes on and on! I seem to get to dancing ability then I get dropped for the Gorilla on the dancefloor that I am :eek2:
Seriously tho, I wish it would be so less complicated but i guess thats how we have become socialised
Nah we get hints, some act on them others are too shy or as someone else said inexperienced. He'll come around eventually.