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Boyriend going into hospital

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
My bf has got to go into hospital, either this week or next, for a minor operation on his back. He's had a similar op before, three years ago, so he's not too fussed about the whole thing - to him, it's more of an inconvenience than anything else.

Last time he had the op he was in a long-term relationship with another girl, and he's already told me in the past she got really clingy around the time of the op. Having known him a fair while now, I know he certainly doesn't appreciate clingy-ness, so I'm not going to get like that (I'm not really that kinda person anyway). Of course I'm worried about him, but I'm trying to keep it all rational, etc.

He'll be in hospital for about a week after the op and then at home for about another three weeks after that, requiring daily trips to the GP/hospital to have the dressings changed etc.

I'm not sure exactly what my point is, but I think I'm just looking for words of advice as to how to act and treat the whole situation. Any ideas for keeping him occupied or for anything nice I can do for him while he's in the hospital. He's already said not to go visit him on the day of the op (fair enough), but that I can go in any other time.

I'm trying not to sound selfish here, but as the op is in his back, he's not going to be up for anything 'strenuous' for a couple of months either (:crazyeyes )

Anyone been in my or my bf's situation (I've never had to go into hospital) and got any words of advice..?? :confused:


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Anesthetic can make you really sleepy for several days so he probably won't really register exactly what's going on.
    I didn't like people making a fuss when I had my ops... firstly cos it's just annoying cos you can't do much for yourself and it makes you more frustrated (well I couldn't after mine... obviously I don't know how mobile your bf is going to be)... secondly, I get a bit of the post op blues and can feel a bit weepy... so people being extra nice to me makes me feel :(
    My sister came for a surprise visit after my last operation and when she walked through the door I burst into tears :blush:

    If he's in hospital for a whole week he's proabably gunna be pretty bored... so maybe just make sure he has a fresh supply for books and puzzles and stuff to keep him occupied? Once it's been done you can probably judge the situation better and know how to react from how he feels...

    He'll probably be feeling a bit shitty about the nothing too strenuous thing too after the op, it doesn't sound selfish :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He'll definitely be getting bored out of his skull after a week in hospital. Keep him supplied with newspapers/books and buy him a card for the TV thing. Sneaking him in some homemade food would be greatly appreciated too I'm sure.

    You haven't really explained what the operation is exactly, but if it's stopping him having sex (= "anything 'strenuous'"?) you need to talk to him about that.

    I don't know what else you're after. He's not worried by it, so don't make him worried by being acting differently around him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if he's not bothered by it, don't let it bother you.

    go and visit, but treat it like you're visiting to entertain him and see how he is rather than drama on the sickbed, mopping his brow and such like. he will want to see a friendly face, especially if he's on a ward with a load of moany people, so even if he doesn't want any fuss being made, i'm sure he'll still appreciate you dropping in and having a good natter.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Treating your boyfriend as you do at home is my best advice. Right so he'l prob be a little more restricted in what he is able to do but don't try and run round and do everything for him, that will prob just bug him!!! :thumb:

    I always find with my patients loadsa mags, puzzles, sweets and treats go down well. Suprise him n take in his fav meal @ tea time or dinner (hospitals are not allowed to warm up food). I ad one patient who's GF brought him steak pudd chips n peas for supper one Fri night as it was what they did every fri-he was well made up. :yum: Some of my younger patients take in their own stereo's and DVD players too (get them checked ova 1st with the hospital n don't 4get the headphones!) Recently i looked after someone who took his PSP in with him!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the advice :)

    He's actually in a private hospital so he's fairly pampered as it is - Sky TV, restaurant standard meals and all that!
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