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sex life has disappeared before it's even started
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK, so I started having sex a few months ago with my girlfriend (first sexual partner), things never really reached that "have to do it all the time wherever we are" phase, it was hard becuase I was inexperienced and nervous I thought it would just happen more often as we both became more confident and comfortable with each other.
It used to be about twice, maybe three times a week, but now, rather then getting more frequent it seems to be dropping to once a week if I'm lucky. We seem to have gone past that initial excitement stage without even having it.
I have spoken to my g/f about this and told her how frustrated I am that I have to go a week to ten days without sex. Now, I'm not saying that sex should rule our relationship, but there just always seems to be an excuse. My g/f can see that this is a problem for me, but doesn't see it as a probelm herself and is quite unwilling to do anything about it.
Is this something I should just accept or am I justified in feeling a bit miffed that I've missed out on that 'can't keep your hands off each other' stage?
It used to be about twice, maybe three times a week, but now, rather then getting more frequent it seems to be dropping to once a week if I'm lucky. We seem to have gone past that initial excitement stage without even having it.
I have spoken to my g/f about this and told her how frustrated I am that I have to go a week to ten days without sex. Now, I'm not saying that sex should rule our relationship, but there just always seems to be an excuse. My g/f can see that this is a problem for me, but doesn't see it as a probelm herself and is quite unwilling to do anything about it.
Is this something I should just accept or am I justified in feeling a bit miffed that I've missed out on that 'can't keep your hands off each other' stage?
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I have to agree, it is not your right to have sex with her but it is your right to have fun and experiment while your still young. Have a think about it ...
Done, done and done.
In fact, the other night we spent the night in together. I had been away with work for a few days and had bought her a surprise present back with me, nothing too special, but it was the perfect gift for her. I spent the night kissing and cuddling, I even gave her a massage (at my offering, not her request) because she had a stiff neck. She knows I love her, I tell her all the time, but sometimes it doesn't make a difference.
I'm never pushy about sex, but I always make sure she knows I want it. But still nothing happens
Like I said, I have spoken to her about this, but she says there isn't a problem.
That's exactly how I feel, yes.
So how have you gone aboput dealing with it?
Do you talk to him?
That's what gets to me the most. I've been so open and honest about how I feel and done all the right things, but she just seems so uninterested in the fact we don't do it as much as I would like, Her answer is always "things change"
No
Maybe you could approach iniatiing it differently,make it a bit more exciting,different from the usual.I have no suggestions im afraid...do tell me if you get anything to work im pretty darn frustrated...
people have different levels of sex drives, be thankful you're getting it once a week! some people might not even get it that much (not me!).