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Drugs controlling a life
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
There is someone I know who frequently takes drugs, they're young with their life ahead of them, and their drug taking is just one symptom of their life going down the pan. Before any of you think of it, I'm not having a go at drug users, because I know that some people do enjoy it healthily, but you must also realise that some people don't.
Anyway, the thing is this person steals money from their own family to buy drugs most days. They skive off school to go meet dealers and smoke cannabis with their friends. They have lost all sense of perspective in life, and are heading down the pan.
I don't know if I should be posting this here perhpa,s but I didn't know where else - what would you do if someone you knew was taking drugs but in a bad way. Would any of you ever steal from your own family for drugs? I doubt it. This person is ruining their life and they'll end up without any family, without any friends, without anything. Is it too late to nip it in the bud?
Anyway, the thing is this person steals money from their own family to buy drugs most days. They skive off school to go meet dealers and smoke cannabis with their friends. They have lost all sense of perspective in life, and are heading down the pan.
I don't know if I should be posting this here perhpa,s but I didn't know where else - what would you do if someone you knew was taking drugs but in a bad way. Would any of you ever steal from your own family for drugs? I doubt it. This person is ruining their life and they'll end up without any family, without any friends, without anything. Is it too late to nip it in the bud?
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Comments
Definately the rebel type. Really ruthless, will look into your eyes and swear on their mothers life they'll pay you back, and just go and take it and buy something stupid like booze or cigarettes or cannabis or poppers. I think they'd be better off in prison or something like that. Stupid though, at 14, they can be anything if they apply themselves. Whereas they want to be a homeless hobo by the looks of it. Everyone tries to help them but it's got to the stage where they are just an embarresment, people are ashamed of the person, etc.
I don't.
It was more of an off hand emotive comment
He's a troubled teenager, not a hugely rare situation. Most of them grow out of it, I used to be a bit of an arsonist, and smoking silly amounts of dope, its a phase normally.
I seriously hope you dont mean that.
One of the reasons I referred it to a drugs issue was the dependence that seems to have grown for these drugs - whether physical or physcological or just to stay looking popular. They smoke cannabis every day and if not they get angry and irritable, symptoms I would associate with a dependency or addiction (but as far as I know, cannabis in itself isn't addictive, though it's normally smoked with tobacco, which is - but the person smokes cigarrettes as well so..).
The unfortunate thing about this phase is that it's been ongoing for a year or two, and they only get worse and worse as they get older. I had talked with other people who know the person and they thought it was a phase too (they were older) but now seem convinced that the person has 'lost their way' so to speak. Given how much potential people have, I don't want this person who is very intelligent when they apply themselves, to end up with the only satisfaction in life being recrational drugs, alcohol, sex et al. Not that they're bad, but all in moderation - this person is still only 14.
Yes, he may have great potential, but it may take him some time to grow up and realise that. You cant expect a 14 year old to realise the serious nature of the world fully, they just are not able to.
I am not attempting to excuse his actions, but I am saying that they arent that bad and just because he is smoking and drinking now does not mean he will become a homeless addict.
Cannabis can be addictive, or at least habit forming, which is slightly different. It sounds to me like the kid is self medicating against issues he has, he isnt happy with himself/enviroment and because of this is seeking an escape.
Thanks for your helpful insight
She went school today as well for her lesson and I was very proud of her. The only issue is that sometimes she'll just think she's cleverer than everyone else again (arrogance runs in the family
Thanks, and yes, I am a LOT older.
If she is a smart kid then its easy to get bored at school, coupled with the above details and the fact that she's 14 and hormones are all over the shop its not hugely surprising she's making unwise choices. Seems a totally normal reaction to me.
Just keep an eye on her and make sure she knows that she can come to you and you will NOT judge her, if you start laying a nasty guilt trip on her it wont stop her doing things, it will just stop her telling you, which is much worse.
I've been generally supportive, although sometimes when she's took the piss I do get annoyed with her - but when she was doing solvents about a year ago I brought her here and since she has stopped. I personally have never taken recreational drugs (except alcohol) and it's my personal choice, so in some respects I felt unable to help her. It's just, her life is going off the rails in so many places, on the one hand I she's like a runaway train in that nothing that I personally can do will help, but on the other I can't stand by and watch her derail her whole life. Teenage years are precious and you only get them once, I don't want her to regret hers.
But you know, she seems better, been to school the past 2 days!
but i would say that if someone you know has a drugs problem.
you cannot really do anything to help them until they are ready to quit themselves... and then you need to be there supporting them. becasue coming off drugs is as hard as hell... i would doubt that anyone with a serious drug problem would manage to quit on their own.
it's not that hard really, i had a serious enough problem, smoking every day, taking stupid amounts of pills at weekends, it got to the stage where i couldn't physically and mentally cope anymore, i went off them by myself, most drugs are only mentally addictive, your decision in taking depends on the environment you're in and most important, whether you want to take them...most people get to the stage where they just quit completely or do drugs very rarely and it's nearly always a choice made by that person themselves...
Of course it is easier with support, but really when it comes down to it breaking an addiction is a personal effort, you have to quit for yourself and largely by yourself.
I never considered my teenage years to be precious, most of the time they were rather unpleasant. I always just thought it was a time you lived through rather than enjoyed.
As for solvents, yes, you do need to be very strong about that, cannabis and alcohol are one thing solvents is TOTALLY different.
She's not going to 'derail' her whole life just because she makes some bad choices at age 14. Hell she's got 2 full years even before GCSE's anything she does in terms of marks at school mean nothing now.