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Blow jobs and hesitation

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Before I say anything I just want you all to know that i love my girlfriend lots and we have no problems in our relationship whatsoever. Theres just one thing thats making me feel a little less loved.

With my girlfriends ex she used to give him head, let him cum and swallow it. She said she didnt really like it but she done it anyway because it wasnt a huge deal. But with me she gives me head and insists that i put on a condom before i cum (a mint one might i add which are fairly hard to get hold of).
She said that its absolutely grose and it makes her feel sick to have it in her mouth, but she said she likes giving me head.

Im not ranting or anything and i appreciate that i am getting head but she said she didnt love her ex, she said he was just for sex. She also said she genuinly loves me and all that la de da so why does she think that its sick if i did come in her mouth? She tried it once and quickly moved her head as i cum so it made a mess.

Like i said im not complaining but it makes me feel soooooooo jealous and unloved when she let her ex cum but wont let me cum unless iv got a condom on. I feel so selfish with this thread........By the way i always do anything she wants in bed!

Any advice to help me stop being a selfish jealous.....typical guy please?

Thanks

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Stop being such a selfish prick?

    Ask her why she doesn't want to do it, and ask for an honest reply. For all you know, she might not have exactly had much say in it in the previous relationship.

    Oh, and mint condoms aren't that hard to get hold of. I have 144 in my bedside cabinet:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    maybe he pushed her into it? there are loads of girls who don't really like cum....so?

    if that makes you feel less loved then you must be very insecure...stop being so selfish and talk to her. relationships are about give and take and communicating.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's probably BECAUSE she loves you that she's saying how she really feels. It's when you're uncomfortable in a relationship that you don't feel able to speak up and say what you don't like, because you worry that you'll lose his affections if you refuse something like that. If she's able to say what she feels uncomfortable doing to you, it's an indication of how secure she feels the relationship is. So chill! Give the poor girl a break!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm amazed that you can still orgasm, if I knew that my partner wasn't enjoying any part of any act, I wouldn't be able to feel turned on at all.

    If you feel unloved because you can't shoot your load into your partner's mouth, I suggest you get your priorities sorted.

    But do talk to her and let her explain. Like the others have said, she may not have had a choice in a previous relationship.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    loads of girls hate men cumming in their mouths- it hardly tastes like strawberry ice cream! not too sure about the condom thing....you should warn her and cum in a tissue,why does it have to be mint?

    if you eat loads of crap there is the possibilty that your cum tastes disgusting too....if she just doesnt like it then thats her choice and theres no point feeling unloved about it, the fact that he is her ex should be significant.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey stop calling him selfish.

    Sorry just had to say that because i thought that he explained in his post, he is fine about having to do it, and nobody has taken that into consideration.
    Everyone just seems to have jumped to the conslusion that he is being selfish and wants to cum in her mouth.
    That just don't seem what he was actually sayin, he just cant understand that why his girlfriend gave her ex a blow job and let him cum in her mouth and swallow yet says she didnt love him, and that he dont get that when she does love him.

    But to answer the question, i think Butterflykisses is right for what she said.
    "It's probably BECAUSE she loves you that she's saying how she really feels."
    and felt uncomfatable and like it was something she HAD to do because the last boyfriend forced it on her even thought she didnt want to do it.
    Or maybe she is lieing to cover the truth that,..... MAYBE, your cum just tastes "RANK" and she don't want you feeling bad so she has come up with and excuse to make it less your fault.
    It's prob just something you should talk about and perhaps bring up the point that, is it just that she didnt have a problem swallowing his cum coz it tasted ok? and she wont because yours dont taste that nice?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    google sweet release. She'll want it all the time then :p

    Talk to her.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    chances are, if she was just seeing that other person for sex then she felt like she had to to keep him with her or happy or something like that. now she's with someone she loves, she perhaps doesn't feel the need to have to do something she doesn't like doing.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks to the people who understood what i meant. Im NOT complaining i just wanted a girls view on why my girlfriend is acting like this. To the people who have had a moan off, im not being selfish its a perfectly good question you just didnt read the post properly.

    With her ex, he was an arsehole who used to mug people/do drugs and was really violent. She knew he was a bad boy but dumped him when she found out about the muggings and stuff so yeh i guess she did feel pressured.

    I do enjoy it and dont mind having to use a condom at all plus we have spoke about it before and she explained that she dont like it (which is fair enough) and she only done it with her ex.

    I know its very selfish but im a very jealous person and get jealous about her ex. Thats a problem that iv got to try and get over. She is comfortable with me and we have a very stable relationship plus we get along so well weve never had problems. This is just me and my problem that im trying to get advice on and sort out. Thanks to the decent people who have replied so far, to the others can you re-read the post before abusing me please! Iv been here long enough for most people to know im a decent guy.

    thank you muchly :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it does sound like she was frightened of her ex then. it doesnt seem like you have anything to be jealous about...he sounds like a total loser.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think you have a horrible attitude.
    if one girl let her ex have sex with her, does that automatically entitile you to sex?
    no.
    so why is this different?

    also, it's not the most pleasant of things for girls to have to experience, having cum in their mouths!
    and...! if you really loved her you wouldn't care because it's obviously something she doesnt want to do

    and don't spin that b.s. that it doesnt bother you because if it didnt you wouldnt have posted
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think you have a horrible attitude.
    if one girl let her ex have sex with her, does that automatically entitile you to sex?
    no.
    so why is this different?

    also, it's not the most pleasant of things for girls to have to experience, having cum in their mouths!
    and...! if you really loved her you wouldn't care because it's obviously something she doesnt want to do

    and don't spin that b.s. that it doesnt bother you because if it didnt you wouldnt have posted

    Your a bit of a bitch really aint ya....

    I did not say that i WANT to come in her mouth or anything, i was wondering WHY! We have a great sex life thank you very much and yes i do love her a lot. I know its not a pleasent thing to experience, to be honest i can totally understand why she wants me to wear a condom. I havent asked if i can cum in her mouth because im trying to respect her feelings and i think its a bit degrading for a girl to let that happen.

    nicebutdim23 - Your right she did mention she felt intimidated around him so yeh she probably was a bit scared.

    Oh and on another note, thanks to the people that actually read my post properly and gave sensible/supportive advice. Your the type of people who deserve to be recognised as decent helpful people. To the other people who dont read properly and start pissing others off coz youve got life of your own you really need to grow up and sort yourself out.

    Thanks
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    because she did it with her ex doesnt mean she enjoyed it. she probably felt pressured to do it and didn't feel as though she could be open with him. i think you should be flattered because she's told you what she likes and what she doesn't and obviously she trusts you to respect that. She obviously wasn't comfortable in the last relationship but it looks as though she is now. You have her now, not him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    BeastieMBK wrote:
    is it just that she didnt have a problem swallowing his cum coz it tasted ok? and she wont because yours dont taste that nice?

    Sorry forgot to answer your question. She said that just cum in general is quite nasty regardless of taste. she did have a problem swallowing his cum but i remember her saying that she did it to avoid any hassle.

    thanks for sticking up for me by the way, im glad some people understand what im trying to say. And your right, i have got no problem at all with wearing a condom, if it makes her happy then im happy to do it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote:
    because she did it with her ex doesnt mean she enjoyed it. she probably felt pressured to do it and didn't feel as though she could be open with him. i think you should be flattered because she's told you what she likes and what she doesn't and obviously she trusts you to respect that. She obviously wasn't comfortable in the last relationship but it looks as though she is now. You have her now, not him.

    Thank you for the nice reply. It seems totally clear now that you and a couple others have mentioned that she wasnt comfortable before but she is now.

    Trust me i am flattered that she can open up to me and tell me everything and i can tell her everything too. Its nice to know we have this trust and comfortableness(if thats a word) with eachother.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Your welcome. And I've always said being able to trust, and be comfortable and open with each other are key parts in a relationship. You obviously trust and respect each other so that's really good. You sound very happy together :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote:
    Your welcome. And I've always said being able to trust, and be comfortable and open with each other are key parts in a relationship. You obviously trust and respect each other so that's really good. You sound very happy together :)

    Thank you we are very happy. My ex was a total disaster and so was hers. Shes the best thing thats happened to me and she said she feels the same :blush:

    If i can openly say that on a public board then it just shows im not a selfish prick :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you can't find the condoms then cum somewhere else.

    Problem solved.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think that you mis-understand.
    he seems to be hurt cos she did it with someone else and not with him. no matter as to if he wanted it or not.
    if he thinks that just cos she did it with someone else and not him then thats a reflection of their relationship, wel in my opinion that's a bit silly if he loves her.

    RudeBwoy wrote:
    Your a bit of a bitch really aint ya....
    and as for that, well, yes. but in my opinion blow jobs are way more intimate than sex as sex is what the body's designed for, whereas blowjobs are not.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it does sound like she was frightened of her ex then. it doesnt seem like you have anything to be jealous about...he sounds like a total loser.

    you summed it up well :thumb:


    its a good thing you dont scare her into doing it and she tells you she dont like

    and hes not selfish he understands she dont want to do it, just found it odd

    anyway, be glad shes honest with you and that shes not doing things she dont like
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Emm yeh sorry about the "bitch" comment, i got a bit pissed off but i take it back (even though you was quite nasty). I agree and think head is more daring, not sure about intimate. If you perform oral then you totally have to be comfortable with that person because its their genitals and generally the easiest place to catch infection.

    wheresmyplacebo - I even said to her that she dont have to give me head if she dont like it, i offered to give it up completely for her but she said she likes it....not the ending result though lol

    Shes been trying to find mint condoms, where the hell can i buy mint condoms????? I got come EXS ones off the net but she said they taste nasty. Where can i get "mates" of "durex" ones? She wants me to get lots of them...

    Thanks guys and girls, i feel a lot better :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    one problem i have is that the way you wrote it, was that you were concerned that she acted differently with you than she did with her ex, fair enough there might be reason or explanation for it, but you were stating that you wanted to know on here what a girls view was on the matter

    which showed to me that it might have perhaps bothered you a little bit, yet why should it bother you at all? you said you dont mind about using the condom etc, so why is this an issue at all?


    because you feel you have been treated differently by her compared to one of her ex's? if thats the case i think its probly worth you mentioning to her that you do feel a little jealous and that it bothers you a little, but that you are fine with things

    why kick up such a fuss and then correct people by saying its not that much of a bother really
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    why have they got to be mint? does she actually give you head with them on? why not just give u naked head and have you cum in a tissue? do u use them the rest of the time? you could use regular condoms if they are just for you to cum in when you get to the crucial point?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    why have they got to be mint? does she actually give you head with them on? why not just give u naked head and have you cum in a tissue? do u use them the rest of the time? you could use regular condoms if they are just for you to cum in when you get to the crucial point?

    Its kinda strange to explain, she likes giving head without a condom with no problems. She just hates cum in her mouth, soooo we did some experimenting with tissues and various condoms etc.....

    Ending result is she likes giving "naked" head but before im gonna cum she stops, lets me put the condom on and she carries on. She think cum in a condom feels funny and she likes it, bless her lol. Emmm well its gotta be mint because shes not fond of the other flavours and i dont know where to get just mint from although i do have a couple left.

    I dont feel i "kicked" up a fuss, just a little concerned. Anyway weve had a chat and she said she was a little scared of her ex and she feels comfortable with me, we are both now totally cool with things and always tell eachother what we like in bed :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kiwis make your cum sweet....or so i hear
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