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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Personally i dont think i could walk away from a child of my own... but she may of been unprepared to dedicate her life to your boyfriends brother.... it must be really hard for the father to put in so much effort to look after the son when he doesn't get any kind of response from him... must be heart breaking... must be really strong to do that.

    But don't think this should be a excuse.. she the mother at the end of the day and regardless of the condition of the son she should of stuck by him.... however hard that may be... but i think this burden may of been too great for her and she prefers to live the life of freedom.
    Well hope that shows my insight into it... had few drinks so if i rambled i can only apologise... *hic*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In cases like this I wish voluntary euthanasia was legal in the UK even though it may sound totally heartless & a quick fix to the 'problem'.

    But, feeling empathetic towards your bf bro then his quality of life seems extremely low if non-existent.

    As for your bf's mum then I think she is just taking the easy way out & not taken responsibility for the fact that she has 2 daughters & 2 sons all be it 1 of her sons not being fit, healthy & well.

    There are just 2 ways to cope with your bf's bro:

    :: 1. To care for him & give him the best quality of life that can be expected for him(like his dad is doing).

    :: 2. To totally forget about him all together & regret the fact that he was ever born(like his mum is doing). It's like saying your child has got brown eyes instead of blue but that doesn't mean that you're going to put the up for adoption.

    A little bit of my ramblings:)

    <br><marquee align="center" loop="infinte"><font color="666666">.:</font><font color="ff6600">Crispy</font><font color="666666">:.</font></marquee><br></font>
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Crispy
    In cases like this I wish voluntary euthanasia was legal in the UK even though it may sound totally heartless & a quick fix to the 'problem'.

    Oh your rambling's very welcome, is all I was doing in any case :)

    My fella's said to me on several ocassions that he wishes it was legal just to end it all for him...but the thing is, he's not deteriorating really, and whilst they said to his Dad that he'd probably not live past 20, he has done. This sounds horrible, like I'm saying "oh hurry up and die" but I feel so bad for his Dad, it's a distinct possibility that he'll spend the rest of his life caring for his son. It's admirable, but it's also really sad to me. He'd never, ever even consider euthanasia, he loves him so much and it's awful because there's no real recognition there. Argh, I don't know...it's one of the worst situations you could be in I think.

    Something else that really gets me about the whole thing is that his sisters never see him either, or ask about him. He doesn't exist to them. The youngest brother (who was a baby when they divorced) has never met him and I don't even know if he's aware of his existence. I don't know how they could not visit, or offer to help out...even if it wasn't out of love for their brother, you'd think they might do it to salve their own consciences.

    I feel bad judging them because I don't know how it feels. But it's hard to understand it.

    crazy_guy - I'm sure it is heartbreaking for him, I mean I've met the son and he's a big fella and he's just motionless and stationary all day...from morning 'til night. As for the mum, I don't know that she was ever incredibly maternal anyway...but even women with not so strong maternal instincts are devoted to their kids. I suppose everyone's different, and there's an amount which everyone can cope with :(
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