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Can you all help me?? Please???

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ok, before i start typing and i cant stop, i just wana say sorry for rambling. Not entirely sure what i want from this post, i just need to get things of my chest!

The problems lie with mine+my b/f's relationship. recently it feels like im doing most of the work! i work 3 nights a week, and go home then, but every other night im staying at his. every night we do nothing, he acts really lazy! i understand he's tired after work, but i sometimes would just like to do different things. its beginning to feel like its only me making the effort! The best days are sundays and bank holidays, the only days we have completely to ourselves. dont get me wrong, i really do love him, and we're going on holiday 2geva in september, but i cant get the nagging feeling out of my head that he's going off me a bit!

Recently we've started spending time with one of his mates, and we all get along really well. however, i think bcos of my worries about us, i am starting to fancy his mate!! :eek2: when im with my b/f its good, but when im alone, i sometimes find myself thinking about this guy!! i also dont miss my boyfriend as much as i used to! ive never liked 2 people at once b4, and its muddling me up :( i know this guy would never go out with me, bcos he respects his friendship with my guy and so even if me+him ended and IF he did like me, he wouldnt wana step on toes. To be honest, i doubt im looking for a guy to replace my b/f with, i just fancy a change. My first b/f took me for granted and we did nothing and got stuck in this awful routine. ever since him i hate the idea of being bored in a relationship!!
What i want is to stop liking this other guy, bcos its pointless! nothing will ever come out of it+i dont want anybody else but my bf!! None of this is making any sense is it? :confused:

maybe this has been brought on by other things?? such as my bf not really being as outgoing as i am - Mostly in the bedroom! I got really drunk the other week, and was gonna suggest we did something we've never done before to spice things up, like have a 3some or summat! that way, if he didnt like the idea, i could just blame it on the drink. I feel bad for being bored, but i think i am. We've been together for nearly 1year, and i dont want to lose what we have, as its really special to me (despite all my moaning)

We both look at sex differently (sorry if i aint allowed to put this in relationships. il move it if any mods want me to). To him its just fucking, hard and fast (which i love dont get me wrong :naughty: ), but we havent once slept together in a slow, passionate and romantic way! ive got a feeling that its more girls that want this, but i just want it once! Oh, i dont know what i want anymore, apart from a clear mind :rolleyes: ! And he lasts for ages, so by the time he's made me cum about 3/4 times, im knackered, and my mind isn't 'on the job'+i just find myself wishing he'd hurry up and cum!!
AARRGGHHH :mad:

Please say what you think, guys AND girls, i want both opinions! im willing to try anything to sort myself out!

Thank you
xxx

BTW, srry for rambling+if any of this seems like pointless cr*p :(

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    seriously, the only thing you can do is talk to your boyfriend about your worries. a key factor in a good long lasting relationship is communication.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lipsy
    seriously, the only thing you can do is talk to your boyfriend about your worries. a key factor in a good long lasting relationship is communication.

    i tried talking to him about this routine part of the problem about a month ago, and things have got better. im also spending more time with my mates and more time at home, so we aint living in each other's pockets. But, he wont listen when i talk to him about the other stuff. he gets really upset+starts saying things like "i love you so much, please dont say you're bored of me and wana split up". i dont want to split up with him, but i feel bad when he says stuff like that :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You need to talk to him, just tell him to stat with u dont wana finish or anything like that, your saying it so things get better :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im going to have to talk to him, but i wont get the chance now til saturday night! its killing me! my head is so messed up that i dont know what to do or think. im scared that if i talk to him, he wont understand, or that it wont help+il have to go on feeling sad for longer!
    does anybody think what i said about mine+his sex life is stupid?? Can a person get bored this quickly?? :confused::confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by spongebobsgirl
    anybody think what i said about mine+his sex life is stupid?? Can a person get bored this quickly?? :confused::confused:

    Not at all, if it is just the "hard, fast" and furious fucking like you said, then a little alteration wouldn't go a miss.. Tenderness and emotion involed into sex hurts no one.

    However, Lipsy's right. You can't keep this bottled, you'll burst and come out all a blubbering, inarticulate mess!

    Trust me, this is a lass talking of experience with bottling feelings. It doesn't help one bit.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by 1983
    Not at all, if it is just the "hard, fast" and furious fucking like you said, then a little alteration wouldn't go a miss.. Tenderness and emotion involed into sex hurts no one.

    However, Lipsy's right. You can't keep this bottled, you'll burst and come out all a blubbering, inarticulate mess!

    Trust me, this is a lass talking of experience with bottling feelings. It doesn't help one bit.


    i know i know, i just need to talk to him, but i dont know how to get him to understand what i wana say?? To be honest, i dont know myself what i want to happen :( its already hurting me keeping things bottled up. im feeling really stressed+have started comfort eating abit - which isn't good as im trying to lose weight for our holiday.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hey every1
    thank you to those who have replied. just wanted to let you know that i took your advice and talked to my b.f. it was funny, bcos the minute i talked to him i felt better :lol: i feel so much happier now, bcos we've both got things off our chest. i didnt mention to him about this other lad, but im totally over it. it was just a silly phase i was going through+now im more in :heart: than ever with my guy. So thank you TheSite, for being so helpful and full of wisdom :thumb: :D:D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Happy to help (even tho not a lot! lol) :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you did help, a great deal. thank you again tink+1983 especially :thumb:
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