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The Most AMAZING feeling...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
IF YOU'RE JUDGEMENTAL, STOP RIGHT HERE AND DON'T READ THE REST OF THIS THREAD.

I just really had to share this because its almost the best thing thats happened in my life. I was together with my boyfriend(now ex) for almost 3 years. I got pregnant and he beat the shit out of my alot to try and kill the baby. He did alot of horrible things. I placed my baby because I didn't want her to know her biological father. (the best decision I ever made) I never thought I would get over him (regardless of all the horrible things he did to me)

I met this guy a couple weeks ago that has started to spark my fancy and for the first time, I havent thought about my ex. My ex has called me alot and normally, I would get all excited and call him back. I havent had the urge to call him at all. :no: He called me tonight and left a message saying he wanted to ask me how everything was going.(in other words, he wanted to rub things in my face how he "hooked up" with all these other girls :rolleyes: ) And this time, I couldnt care less when I thought about what he would tell me. So i called him back and we started talking. It was different because I wasnt interested at all what he was saying. When we used to talk alot, he would ALWAYS get off the phone first and say "well i gotta go babe." and this time? after he told his story of "getting all this ass at the club", i said "i gotta go to bed, but ill cya around." :D can I just say that, I HAVE NEVER FELT SO POWERFUL!!! it pissed him off because for once, he didnt have control over me. I never thought it would be possible to live my life without him and I can honestly say that I can listen to songs he sang to me without thinking about him, I hear his name and not think of him at all, and I love the feeling of getting on with my life because I have people in my life who care about me and want whats best for me.

I know this is a little pathetic to be happy about but he controlled every aspect of my life. Now I realize that not every guy is an asshole like he was to me. I know people rarely do this because there isnt much to reply back to. I just had to get this out.

Thanks for reading this.




P.S if you're in a relationship and you have ANY DOUBT at all about the person you're with, GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP FAST. DO NOT SETTLE. :no: I settled for what I thought was a great guy and look how I ended up- pregnant, beaten and miserable. If you really want to know if the person you're in a relationship with loves you, set a boundary and see if the person goes past it. If they go past it, get out FAST. ok, I'm done preaching... ;)

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That was all great except for the PS part.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    awwwwwwwwwww
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi there

    Firstly what a horrible time you've had to go through, you sound like you have got your head around it all and are feeling positive but if you want or need to talk to someone about it all, try the following helpline:

    Women’s Aid Federation of England
    National charity that works towards an end to domestic violence for women and children through policy change and the provision of advice and refuge support. Provide a helpline and a national network of refuges.

    08457 023468
    www.womensaid.org.uk

    Secondly, I'm pleased your life seems to be getting brighter and hope it all goes well. Just take it slowly, and above all make sure you are taking good care of yourself.

    Susie x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It sounds really great that you've ditched the asshole, emotionally as well as technically, its not pathetic to be happy about it! its great! Seize control! (if only more of us could take some control of our lives!)
    Good luck with the new guy! I hope he's wonderful & treats you as a goddess!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thats really great wat you said :)
    i know how you feel, its brilliant when you meet someone who makes nothing else seem bad anymore. i know cos i've met mine now :)

    good luck with everything :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    congratulations! :) I am really really pleased for you!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well done :thumb:

    It's not pathetic at all to fell so happy about it, it's great that you can move on and put all that crap behind you :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if ur in any doubt at all do u end it? been in doubt for a while and it's all got too much.... think i want out, but i'm not sure i'm strong enough to do it. been here before and have always failed.... ?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Im very pleased for you. :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Awww, thats good, well done for getting out of it! :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    good for you. you go girl! ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nice one babe you deserve only the best!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by natos
    if ur in any doubt at all do u end it? been in doubt for a while and it's all got too much.... think i want out, but i'm not sure i'm strong enough to do it. been here before and have always failed.... ?

    is it that you're not happy but don't know if you can ditch him, or you're ok but its not meeting your expectations?

    If its that you're not happy, then its not a relationship anyway, so just screw up your courage and tell them you're unhappy/unsatisfied in the relationship, so you want out.

    If its not living up to the ideal still say so, but see if the two of you can fix it, if its worth fixing- I've been in the situation where it wasn't quite good enough, but some things are worth working on.

    It all depends HOW unsure you are.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Freyja
    is it that you're not happy but don't know if you can ditch him, or you're ok but its not meeting your expectations?

    If its that you're not happy, then its not a relationship anyway, so just screw up your courage and tell them you're unhappy/unsatisfied in the relationship, so you want out.

    If its not living up to the ideal still say so, but see if the two of you can fix it, if its worth fixing- I've been in the situation where it wasn't quite good enough, but some things are worth working on.

    It all depends HOW unsure you are.

    i'm happy in the relationship, but yea u have summed it up - not living up to the ideal....we have loads of fun and when it's good it's really good, but when he stops making an effort or it seems to me like he's stopped, i get doubts..... Maybe i'm expecting too much, i'm not sure
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm glad you're finally getting over your ex. It looks like you're finally realising that there's life beyond him. Everybody eventually learns that after a break up that they will eventually meet someone else.

    From what you've said, he is a control freak. Calling you up, and knowing you'll call him back, is all part of the control he's trying to exert on you and your life. Now you've begun to realise what he's like, and what he's doing, you're on the way to getting over him.
    It's a pity he still causes you so much grief, and will probably continue to do so. Now that you're hanging up on him, and hopefully won't be calling him back in the future, maybe he'll try to do other things to remain in your life in some way. It's sad, it's pathetic, of him, but as long as you're ready for him you'll be fine. Don't think about it too much though. You're starting over with someone else now, and that's what you should be concentrating on, and enjoying. :)

    Getting over someone, even if they're totally nasty to you, does take time. It's a sort of grieving, even mourning, process. It sounds like you're at the end of that now. If only he wouldn't call you, or pester you in any way (which is his way of attempting to have some control over you still).

    I'm glad you're feeling so good about it. Things can only get better! :hyper:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know how you feel, it's such a lovely thought to get over someone who's been controlling parts of your life for years. Now you can show him what he's missing. Or something. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm in constant doubt but I keep on trying... She's broken some of my barriers and I've broken some of hers, we're both learning to be together happily.. it's hard though because we're stuck in one room of my dads house.. should be in our place soon though :D
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