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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How do you think leaving will help? You'll have to come back and face it at some point. I sympathise with you, but you ought to let them know how much they're upsetting you. Otherwise, they'll carry on. £220 sounds a lot really, I don't think that's fair while you're a student.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just an update:

    i've decided to sit it out till my birthday (7 weeks and 5 days and counting!) as i've met someone and he's 22, and i know my mum wont like it. so i dont wanna stir things up. i'll wait till my birthday and i'll tell her he's 22 (if we still like each other), that im gonna go out more and later, and that i need my freedom.

    i've had a few offers of spare rooms if i do get shit from them. so i'll sit it out till then, and then make a stand

    how's that sound?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sounds like a good plan.
    Just dont shout, even if they do. You will make them look like the childish ones if they start yelling
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Zella
    Sounds like a good plan.
    Just dont shout, even if they do. You will make them look like the childish ones if they start yelling

    yeah, if they shout i'll just walk away
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Excellent plan. Good luck!!!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ok, us mods have kept quiet on this but actually ClaireBear and I are so angry for you!

    £220 a month is extortionate - I don't pay much more than that for a month's rent (bills included) in pricey London, and the fact that they take that much and you get no freedom is outrageous! I'd talk to them about it now if I were you. Calmly of course. See if you can arrange something else, especially when you have so little to live off.

    Just what we think anyway

    You poor thing

    Da modz xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Susie
    Ok, us mods have kept quiet on this but actually ClaireBear and I are so angry for you!

    £220 a week is extortionate

    i was scared then for a sec! i thought you'd said angry at me!

    its £220 a month not a week, buts its still to much.

    i do want to talk to them but i've tried and it gets me no where. so im just going to wait till my birthday and then just tell them its got to change or im moving out
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    month, sorry, yes that's what I meant!!!

    and OK :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well i tried to talk to my mum again today.
    we went to the cash point and i had hardly any money left and she asked where it had all gone so i said 'well i have to give u half wat i get a month' and she said there's nothing she can do about that.
    so i said well fair enough i have to pay it but its unfair that i still dont get any freedom, she said like wat so i told her about how i dont want to have to come in at 10 on friday and saturday nights and all that and said about my friend who (who is 3 months older than me) is allowed to stay out as late as she likes on weekends and stay round who ever's houses she likes, go where ever she likes etc and she said yes well she's 18. so i said 'so next month when im 18 will i be allowed to do all that?' and she said no and then wouldnt talk to me the whole rest of the way home but now shes all pally pally with me like nothing has happened

    i dunno what else to do :crying:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i seriously don't know how you've coped for so long. when i was your age i used to go festivals and to this nightclub that didn't close til7am so i wouldn't be getting home til 8am the next day!

    they're trying to keep you as a child for as long as they can and sorry to say this but it sounds like you're making it easy for them. you do as you are told even when its completley unfair. you definitley need to put your foot down. it's ridiculous, they take money from you as if you're an adult yet treat you like a baby.

    i'm not sure what advice i can give that would be helpful because i don't know your parents and they are so different to mine. all i know is if i was you i'd be rebelling, i'd be going out and doing what you should at your age. i'd go out and then i would phone them and say "i won't be coming home til such a time tonight" and if they shout i'd say "i'm with my friends, i'll be fine. see you later". and hang up. i'd threaten not to pay rent and i'd threaten to move out too.

    good luck and try to be stronger.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lipsy
    they're trying to keep you as a child for as long as they can and sorry to say this but it sounds like you're making it easy for them. you do as you are told even when its completley unfair. you definitley need to put your foot down. it's ridiculous, they take money from you as if you're an adult yet treat you like a baby.

    i'd love to just rebel, but they'd kick me out or it'd just make it worse. there just isnt anything i can see to do :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    how about your dad, have you spoken to him?

    it seems a bit silly your mum asking where all your money has gone; it's clear that you give half to her! though it must be hard for you to spend the rest if you're never allowed out.

    i'm not really sure what to say, but like lipsy said - just try and be strong. wait till you're 18 and see if there's any improvement. until then, bite your tongue and try not to argue about it 'cause you'll only give them more reason to treat you like a 12 year old.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lucifer devil
    how about your dad, have you spoken to him?

    it seems a bit silly your mum asking where all your money has gone; it's clear that you give half to her! though it must be hard for you to spend the rest if you're never allowed out.

    i'm not really sure what to say, but like lipsy said - just try and be strong. wait till you're 18 and see if there's any improvement. until then, bite your tongue and try not to argue about it 'cause you'll only give them more reason to treat you like a 12 year old.

    there is even less point with my dad, he worse than my mum. he just shouts and wont let me say anything

    i dunno if i can take another month of this :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by blonde__batman
    i dunno if i can take another month of this :(

    you can, you've put up with it for however many years. good luck. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lucifer devil
    you can, you've put up with it for however many years. good luck. :)

    thats what my boyfriend said to, just to wait till im 18. 6 more weeks to go. i guess it'll b ok. well i'll have to get through it wont i!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by blonde__batman
    thats what my boyfriend said to, just to wait till im 18. 6 more weeks to go. i guess it'll b ok. well i'll have to get through it wont i!

    yeh and you will. you show 'em who's boss. :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Does she have an e-mail address? I find putting things like this in writing is always much easier, or show them how mature you are and organise a family discussion on it. As long as you stay calm and don't get angry or go off on one, It'll show them just how mature you really are. If you pay rent, you don't deserve to be treated like a little kid. I hope it all works out for you :)

    [All my opinion, it just seems better to try to talk to them on an adult level before resorting to threats :)]
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Doofay
    Does she have an e-mail address? I find putting things like this in writing is always much easier, or show them how mature you are and organise a family discussion on it. As long as you stay calm and don't get angry or go off on one, It'll show them just how mature you really are. If you pay rent, you don't deserve to be treated like a little kid. I hope it all works out for you :)

    [All my opinion, it just seems better to try to talk to them on an adult level before resorting to threats :)]

    i've tried talking to them numerous times. and yesterday i tried again, i didnt shout or lose my temper but they just arent reasonable
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by blonde__batman
    i've tried talking to them numerous times. and yesterday i tried again, i didnt shout or lose my temper but they just arent reasonable

    Well, i suppose if you think there's no other way, it's your decision :) fingers crossed for you!

    Duffy
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