If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
UK is accused of failing children
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/6359363.stm
Could our high incidents of teenage pregnancies be part of the issue? We literally have children bringing up children ...
This might make things very difficult for people to get out of the poverty trap - even though they want to. Thoughts?
Could our high incidents of teenage pregnancies be part of the issue? We literally have children bringing up children ...
This might make things very difficult for people to get out of the poverty trap - even though they want to. Thoughts?
0
Comments
what is "poverty?" Isn't it all relative? I find it hard to believe that true poverty in terms of going hungry and cold, exists in this country with regards to children. And if it does, it is down to the parents not spending money wisely.
Children living in homes earning less than half national average wage - 16%
What is the national average wage?
Children rating their peers as "kind and helpful" - 43%
This just seems silly.
Families eating a meal together "several times" a week - 66%
In an ideal world families would eat together often. But with parents working long hours, it's hard.
Children who admit being drunk on two or more occasions - 31%
Is a child someone under 16? I wouldn't say that was unusual. Most kids experiment.
The problems we have are all down to the idea of "dog eat dog"- to be someone you have to earn more money and screw more people than anyone else. Working together, being caring and sharing, is seen as a negative trait. The only surprise is that its only one third of children who have been bullied in the last 6 months.
If you have a society which values instant gratification and denigrates those who don't have huge resources then you'll have a damaged society. It isn't rocket science.
There are still a lot of children in absolute poverty, and it has little or nothing to do with the parents. A society that leaves children homeless- and not through choice- is a society that is rotten. A society that bullies parents into borrowing more than they can afford, and the bullying them to repay it, is a society that's rotten to the core. It's no wonder parents pay debt that they can't afford when the debt collection agencies threaten them with prison- and they don't know that it's bullshit.
The long-hours society we have is not excusable either.
The fact that people blame the parents shows just what a rotten society we have become. If a child turns out bad it is our fault as much as anyone else's.
It's sad because it costs so much to live in the UK that parents have to work one, often two jobs in order to put food on the table and this leaves less time to spend with the kids and show them they're loved. We live in a high stress 24 hour society and this rubs off on children. We are constantly in debt, we are not providing things for children to do so they end up walking the streets and causing trouble, then in many cases, going back home to a family who are stressed out about money.
The fact is that we're screwing our kids up and when they react in the best way they know how, be it hyper and begging for attention in the supermarket, hanging around on street corners, using drugs or getting pregnant we label them as wastes of time, as something to fear, as horrible little brats who don't know how good they've got it. We slap ASBOs on them, we write letters to the newspaper and complain about how they scare older generations.
I'm not excusing all delinquent behaviour, but instead of condemning them why aren't we trying to help them? Why aren't we making donations, or volunteering with youth groups? Why aren't we organising visits from firemen or footballers to give talks and something for these children to aspire to be? Why aren't we providing more accessible councilling for families who have problems?
I think we treat our children too much like little adults and that both children, the elderly, people with disabilities and the vulnerable should be properly looked after. When you're little, your experiences are what shapes you as a person, it shouldn't just be the parent's responsibility to give somebody a good childhood, but the whole community itself. We should all be chipping in the best we can.
As for what we can do, well there is a strong corelation between societies which look after their people and how high up you are on the list. Investing properly in public services and housing would save us loads in terms of public health and crime.
I think its more than that. It's about people who see no other way of gaining self-validation. No education, no work prospects, shitty housing, feeling shit...having a kid that loves you and you love unconditionally is a way of at least having something.
I think this whole report is a bit bears shitting in woods, but it raises important points. And those who "blame the parents" are the ones who create the atmosphere in which these problems originate and fester.
She actually said "I think that rather than making abortion more accessible, sex education and contraception should be available in schools for children at a younger age than it is available now."
Everybody blames the poor sex education at school, but how many 14, 15 year olds honestly do not know that if you have sex without a condom (or other protection) you risk getting pregnant? Surely not the numbers that are getting pregnant!
Is it the poor level of sex education in school to blame still after they have had one abortion, they find theirselves in the same situation 6 months later?
I'm not saying that the current sex education scheme in schools is ideal, in some i guess it's far from it, but this isn't a question of teaching them during which days of their cycle they are most fertile, and how long Sperm lives for, and as such how to equate when it is safe to have sex.
It's the very basic. Sex without protection = a possibility of becoming pregnant
Millions of young adults manage to realise this, even with the pathetic level of sex ed in schools, even my friends and i grasped this concept at around 11/12 without having to go through 3 abortions before it clicked...
Anyway, Im digressing from the main question!
There are many reasons why people do not use contraception. Their boyfriend pressurises them into not using it, for instance.
Do you mean contraception generally or just condoms?
Certainly divorced women over the age of 35 are one of the most at-risk groups from STIs.
:yes:
I don't know about women specifically but I've been to health meetings and a high proportion of STIs are in middle aged people.
But that's off topic really.
Being bought up in a money stressed family is never going to do the kids any favours. How many kids were actually surveyed though?
Tell that to the moody teenagers who are rebelling against their parents and just want to get out....
You are quite right that it's more attractive to be at home where living is free etc but people don't always see that. Kids these days don't know they're born
yeah, and as soon as everyone calms down and the baby arrives, they go rushing back. I don't think that teens have babies to rebel, i think alot of it is carelessness and ignorance. I'm pretty sure that the number of teens having abortions is higher than those having babies?
there are pleanty i'm sure - but becoming a mother at 15 seems to automatically make you a bad one. Maybe, because chances are they're not mature enough, but you still hear of pleanty child abuse cases by 'regular' parents. I still don't think becoming a mother so young is a good idea though, just to clear that up.
I agree that there are young mothers out there who have children for the right reasons. They must have a terrible time dealing with stereotypes.
On a similar subject, did anyone read in the paper about the couple sent to prison for abusing their handicapped daughter? I think I'm right in saying they got 10 years each... and if what the papers said is true then the things they did to that little girl deserves life.
And the fact that people consider having a baby and living on benefits to be an ambition says a lot about the society we live in.
:yes: and as i said in my post, i sincerely hope that I didn't cause any offence because i certainly didn't intend to.
Anyway, I think it speaks volumes that a member of the cabinet decided to take her child out of state education because they couldn't cater to the child's special needs. Then when you consider that something like 80% of people in prison have a recognised behavioural disorder (or mental health disorder, I can't remember which) it's not surprising that these people ended up in prison, when they were educated in a system that lacked the facilities or expertise to deal with their particular difficulties. There's so much emphasis the percentage of students getting A* to C grades, that we are forgetting about the people that could get a few C's if they were given the right support, but instead get frustrated with education and end up leaving with nothing. Without trying to spout too much of a generalisation, these are the people that are likely to end up as petty criminals in their teens, and persistant reoffenders in the future.
On the issue of sex education, I think we've got it wrong in this country. There is far too much emphasis on the physical act, and not enough on the emotional and decision making side of things - the type of thing that other European countries take into consideration. We need to get the message across to young people to respect their own bodies, respect their own right to make a decision regarding it, and not to bow to the pressure from other people to do things they're not comfortable in doing.
As I said - its not really about the benefits, it goes way deeper.
i meant are wages keeping up with tax and interest?
Both the school and the LEA reckon otherwise.
Not that I think a cabinet minister of New Labour, and a member of Opus Dei, would be a liar or anything...
I imagine that the very worst cases probably do get special treatment and are allowed to be moved to private education instead (which may have been the case in this instance, we don't know), but I would reckon that the vast majority of children with special needs have to put up with substandard education.
I realise you're being pretty general but I would not say that is unique to Britain and the US (the US being second from bottom on this table). Although, I would not say this 'dog eat dog' culture you speak of is particularly applicable to France yet France also scores badly.
Although, in spite of our long hours society in terms of productivity we lag well behind most comparable countries.
I think most of the problems exposed by these findings would be solved with raising standards in education. Comprehensive one-size-fits all education has failed and it's no coincidence that two countries with it, Britain and the US have came at the bottom. We need decent schools specialising in academic pursuits and others specialising in vocational pursuits - this exists in Germany, and in Germany the latter is not viewed as inferior. I think something like that would help a lot in improving skills which is what is badly needed. A lot less people in Germany leave school without any qualifications or skills. The amount of people who leave school with no GCSEs in Britain is scandalous.