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She wants a baby!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Okay, wasn't too sure if this should have gone into relationships or sex. My apologises!
I've got myself into a bit of a situation. I met someone on Christmas eve and we ended up having unprotected sex. She told me that she was on the pill. Before everyone pounces on me - I realise it was naive and stupid to trust someone that I hardly knew!
Now she tells me that she is late for her period. And that this might have something to do with messing up her pill in the previous month. She's been telling me that she's been having cravings and eating a lot (3 days ago). That she is tired and she has tightness in her abdomen (which started like 4 days ago). Currently she's been sick and having stomach cramps in the evening. She also says her boobs are sore. It's only been 9 days since we had sex and yet she exhibits what I would consider are the full range of pregnancy symptoms. Is this even plausible?
I am really worried. It's not like I wouldn't mind being a Daddy or that I'm unwilling to change my life. I offered to go buy a pregnancy test to make sure. She's told me absolutely not and that she will upset if it says negative (as she shockingly she now reveals she would quite like a child). However, she keep maintaining that she isn't pregnant (her period will come) i.e. total denial about the situation! Seems like a contradiction to me.
I need some advice, I really don't know know what either (sorry to seem so numb). Firstly I would like to know if exhibiting range of symptoms so early is normal? Secondly, I feel like I am being manipulated by her, what is suitable strategy for responces to all of this?
I've got myself into a bit of a situation. I met someone on Christmas eve and we ended up having unprotected sex. She told me that she was on the pill. Before everyone pounces on me - I realise it was naive and stupid to trust someone that I hardly knew!
Now she tells me that she is late for her period. And that this might have something to do with messing up her pill in the previous month. She's been telling me that she's been having cravings and eating a lot (3 days ago). That she is tired and she has tightness in her abdomen (which started like 4 days ago). Currently she's been sick and having stomach cramps in the evening. She also says her boobs are sore. It's only been 9 days since we had sex and yet she exhibits what I would consider are the full range of pregnancy symptoms. Is this even plausible?
I am really worried. It's not like I wouldn't mind being a Daddy or that I'm unwilling to change my life. I offered to go buy a pregnancy test to make sure. She's told me absolutely not and that she will upset if it says negative (as she shockingly she now reveals she would quite like a child). However, she keep maintaining that she isn't pregnant (her period will come) i.e. total denial about the situation! Seems like a contradiction to me.
I need some advice, I really don't know know what either (sorry to seem so numb). Firstly I would like to know if exhibiting range of symptoms so early is normal? Secondly, I feel like I am being manipulated by her, what is suitable strategy for responces to all of this?
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My immediate reaction is that she is full of shit. It seems that she's being too textbook, and her defensiveness when you suggest a test is quite revealing.
That said, I only have your side of the story, so she may not be so defensive. Try cutting contact for a bit and see if her stories get taller and more desperate- if they do, then chances are she is lying.
I guess you've learned the hard way that its always a good idea to wrap up well with people you don't know. You could have caught so much, even if she was on the pill, and whilst condoms are annoying and uncomfortable, they're not as annoying and uncomfortable as genital warts.
Sounds like a bit of a dodgy one to me.
But glad you see this is a lesson learned, always strap up.
My reaction too.
I asked her when her last period ended so I could calculate the expected date of her next period. The first date she gave me predicted that she should have been in the middle of her period on the 24th of December. She wasn't on her period.
When I quizzed her about this, she gave me a different date for her last period. This date predicted she should have started her period on the 26th December (2 days after we'd had sex). Now, I know you can get pregnant at any point in monthly cycle but surely just before her period would be unlikely?
After days of not meeting, she now decided tomorrow would be a good time to meet. She's being very, very friendly and nice to me. The alarm bells are ringing. What have I done!
Be very careful.
It possible she is but only time will tell.
Sounds to me like shes a bit of an odd one.
Tell her to take a test [when one will be effective] and prove it... or do one. She sounds scary, but at least it means you'll be sure to shrink wrap your dick in future eh
Far to early to tell get her to do a test my advice is keep away until she contacts you please keep us all informed good luck sandie:shocking: :wave:
Good luck!
she may really like you and just be trying to keep you or to get revenge for unprotected sex which she may regret
also if you think 'i may be pregnant because i had unprotected sex' you often see signs which often you wouldnt because your paranoid about it, well at least i did that when i thought there was a chance i might be just because i'm a paranoid person really
but overall i don't believe shes pregnant, so just take what she says with a pinch of salt, as people use to say
Very true. But I would be more inclined to say she's lying, because that's way too many symptoms to be having so early on. Also she said to you that she's been eating a lot plus she's been being sick. If you've got a dodgy tummy the last thing you're going to want to do is eat lots, even if you're pregnant.
Despite her having a strop about trying a home pregnancy test I did end up buying one. Her attitude wasn't so nice and she told me I could "stick it up [my] arse" or "piss on the stick [myself]". Anyway, she did take the test and it was negative. She wouldn't even look at the result herself and said that she would be disappointed if it was negative but scared if it was positive (as now she tells me she has miscarried before).
However, that test was just over a week ago and her period has still not come. She did go to the doctors and received her result of urine test today - which were inconculsive! She says her doctor is going to repeat the test but not again till next week, as he (her doctor) is more concerned about recently discovered kidney infection. Another rather convient delay.
All of this is strange. The first home pregnancy test was taken 9 days after missing her period, well, according to the second set of dates for cycle she gave me. I still feel like I am being manipulated. I would love to have more sympathy and concern for her - but she treats me like the dirt on her shoe.
what a psycho.
Avoid her. Run away. Change your phone number. Just get shut of her...
She sounds as though she has issues. RUN RUN RUN!
You may want to get her to take another one though, because the pregnancy hormones can take up to three weeks to show.
And stress can make your period late, so being stressed about being pregnant can actually create the probability of being pregnant to someone.
I think the majority of that makes sense...
We've not spoken for a while, as I thought it would be best to distance myself from her. She called me this morning and told me that got the result of another pregnancy test from the doctors. Positive!
...and there is something else. In the time (just a few days) that I've been quiet she's found someone new. He says that he'll support her if she want - why he's do this I don't know? She never wants to speak to me again and says that she is going to have an abortion (despite suggestions early on in the conversation that she would keep it).
I'm not really angry that she's found someone, there's been a hint of other people all along actually. If it's true that it's mine and she wanted to keep it why wouldn't she try harder to keep me in her life. I don't know how I've let things come to this.
I'm inclined to take anything she says with a pinch of salt to be honest.
I feel quite releaved that she wants to break contact. I really do want to take this seriously, I did make the mistake of not using a condom and trusting her. I am confused over this. I feel I have some responsibility or at the very least I should do something to help.
She gets to scare the living shit out of you, and she gets to take the satisfaction of doing that.
The more I read the more certain I am that she is lying. Home tests are very reliable, so if it was negative chances are she was never pregnant. The pregnancy hormone is even present for a little while after a miscarriage, so unless she's miscarried weeks before (unlikely) then she isn't, and never was, pregnant.
The important thing is to learn the lesson- always wrap your todger up nice and warm when you sleep with a new girl.