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I hate Christmas!!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've just had the worst Christmas ever after recently splitting with my Girlfriend of 4 years. I thought we'd be together forever but after her 2 sisters split within 3 months of each other earlier this year (relationships of 7 and 11 years) she became distant and unloving towards me. She'd be so cold towards me and always put her sisters before me and our relationship making me feel shut out and unwanted. I'd try to explain as gently as possible how I was feeling but she'd say that I was being paranoid, selfish even, for not being very understanding. All this was not like her at all as she was the most special, thoughtful and loving person I have ever met.
Things did not settle down after about 5 months, and just before Christmas I made the heartbreaking decision to end it, even though it was the last thing I wanted to do. She took the decision much better than I was expecting, and though upset, said she didn't feel the same about me any more and needed some space.
To make things worse I lost touch with the strong group of male friends I had 4 years ago and though I have made an effort to try get back in touch it seems that they have moved on with girlfriends and families of their own, and though I've met up with a couple of them since the breakup, things will never be like the old days and I feel so alone. I can't say I have one really close friend in the world.
Deep down I don't think there is much chance of a reunion as she has seemed to have moved on. I still love her and think about her nearly every minute of every day. I'm feeling lonely, isolated and depressed and the fact that it is Christmas time just makes things a million times worse.
I know I have to move on but how can I when I can't stop thinking about the person I care about most in the whole world? Everything seems pointless at the moment and though not seriously considering suicide, for the first time in my life I can understand why some people do.
Advice please! :crying:
Things did not settle down after about 5 months, and just before Christmas I made the heartbreaking decision to end it, even though it was the last thing I wanted to do. She took the decision much better than I was expecting, and though upset, said she didn't feel the same about me any more and needed some space.
To make things worse I lost touch with the strong group of male friends I had 4 years ago and though I have made an effort to try get back in touch it seems that they have moved on with girlfriends and families of their own, and though I've met up with a couple of them since the breakup, things will never be like the old days and I feel so alone. I can't say I have one really close friend in the world.
Deep down I don't think there is much chance of a reunion as she has seemed to have moved on. I still love her and think about her nearly every minute of every day. I'm feeling lonely, isolated and depressed and the fact that it is Christmas time just makes things a million times worse.
I know I have to move on but how can I when I can't stop thinking about the person I care about most in the whole world? Everything seems pointless at the moment and though not seriously considering suicide, for the first time in my life I can understand why some people do.
Advice please! :crying:
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Comments
It's understandable that you're feeling so low at the moment. You clearly made a difficult but brave decision to end the relationship - one that gives you a fighting chance of finding future happiness.
However, while you may feel as though you should be able to feel much better in a few weeks, the reality is that such important relationships can take a long time to get over, and you shouldn't feel bad about it. Losing a long term partner is like a bereavement for many so you need time to grieve your loss - you may find the following articles on mending a broken heart and getting over it reassuring.
Hope this helps - take good care of yourself.