She keeps stealing everyones stuff :(

Former Member

Ok, I'm in a cottage (halls of residence still) with 5 other first year students, although there's only two of us around 18/19, the others are a few years older, up to 24! Anyway, one girl seems to be pinching everyones food and stuff... nothing major and nobody would mind a little bit, but she seems to do it habitually. I finished my orange juice the other day and had a full carton in the fridge unopened.. came down and it's half gone! Ok, so it's only 50p a carton but I invested in it for the week as I love having orange juice in the morning.

Another guy brought 24 bottles of water with him, and after the second week they were all gone! (he drank one a day). A few days later I noticed a lot of the empty bottles had been filled with Robinsons orange cordial and stuffd in the fridge - by a lot I mean 6 or 7 - which is another clue because the same girl who I thought took my orange juice is the only one who drinks the orange cordial!

All my teaspoons went the first week so I had to buy some more, and they've started going too now, and I did a naughty thing and found some in her drawer.

My teatowel is just gone . Others have complained about her 'use without permission' method of going about things - she's got a cupboard full of kitchen cookware but for some reason uses this other girls pretty much all the time. She'll come in the Kitchen, open this girls cupboard and just takes what she needs.

Although I can't pin this on her either, I've had the odd packet of noodles etc. go missing from my cupboard... But from a process of elimination I think it's her - because:

- one flatmate cooks everything from fresh ingredients, always!
- one flatmate has complained that her stuff is going missing too
- one flatmate is really sound :thumb: and sometimes asks if he can borrow my stuff but he always makes sure to ask first - he'll even come up to my room and knock on the door etc.
- one flatmate also asks if he can borrow stuff, he was the one with all his water pinched, but he tends to cook rice. Lots and lots of rice. :yippe:

This last girl, she's nice enough in person - though getting used to her personality can be harrowing as she's very confrontational. On her first night she was crying and banging on doors and stuff and I told the other guys saying I thought she was homesick, then she came up to me and said 'excuse me! Did you say xxxxx about me??' and I tried to laugh it off... but I wasn't gossiping about her I was just saying she was really upset.

I'm thinking one of two things, or possibly both are true.

1. She's taking advantage of other people, not maliciously but perhaps that's what she is used to, and should really only use her own stuff most of the time and take the odd bit of universal commodity (for example, I borrow salt to put in my pasta - but I did ask at first but they said no prob anytime).

2. I'm too possesive of my own belongings, but I go to the shop and pay for them and other people eat them that's not very fair is it? But my sister complains to me at home because I don't share my stuff with her there either.

What would you guys do? I was thinking, I'd let it lie for a bit and hopefully it would blow over, because it's lots of little things really, but then my orange juice carton was opened and I knew for a fact I didn't open it. Bah. Miffed.

Former Member

I think you need a house meeting!

Former Member

It's theft, family is a bit different, but quite frankly unless it's a bit of a communist (I use your stuff you use my stuff we break even) situation then it's not ok.

I buy things because I want to have them, if I could afford enough food for two people I'd eat better. She needs to keep her filthy mits off your stuff and it's probably about time you got your flat together and had a word.

Don't say "You dirty bitch, you've been taking my stuff" say "My stuff has been walking and I can't afford to feed more than me, I don't really know who's been at it, but it stops now"

Former Member

Try talking to some of your other hosue mates, things we did last year were stick signs of the fridge saying something to the effect of 'Please ask before you borrow someone elses stuff', and sticking labels/writing your name on your stuff. That way it's clear it's yours and you don't see it as stuff to share. Maybe a sign on the cupboards saying 'If you temporarily borrow something please return it to where you found it clean and dry'.

Former Member

It's theft, and she sounds like a nutjob.

I'd keep everything you own nailed down in your room- that's what we did. As for the butter and milk, a drop of green food dye never did anyone any harm.

I don't know how successful post-it notes would be- someone who nicks won't be deterred.

Former Member

If she's absent mindedly borrowing because she doesn't think you'll mind then post its help to trip the conscience. Getting a reputation for drinking from the carton may help!

Former Member

Scary Monster wrote:

Getting a reputation for drinking from the carton may help!

especially if you stick a few cornflakes round your mouth one day too with pritt stick and tell everyone you have herpes.

Former Member

Stuff kept in communal areas often ends up walking. I like the idea of a house meeting and putting your name on stuff in the fridge to make it obvious it's yours... but if that doesn't work then the best solution is to keep as much as possible in your own room. It's not as convenient, but at least you'll know it's safe!

Former Member

shyboy don't be worrying that you sound petty because its one packet of noodles here and some orange juice there. you don't even know this girl and she has no right to take anything of yours without asking! she sounds completely selfish and it needs sorting out. better now than further down the line. you should all go speak to her so you can back each other up. be direct, let her know that although you're not blaming her, yhings have been going missing and so from now on people will stick to their own food/labelled cupboards unless they have asked permission. it might be difficult but its the sort of thing that you have to face when you move to uni/share accommodation.

Former Member

Yeah your not in the wrong here, I can emphasise with you, and from here it sounds like shes a couple of sanwiches short of a picnic and thinks she can do as she pleases. Put some laxitives in the orange juice but tell the other flatmates then you will find out if it is her!!

Former Member

What we do is collect a kitty of money which goes on loo roll, washing up liquid and food that we share (eg, bread, lentils, rice, pasta)... Then everything else we buy is our own. It isn't too bad in my house because I love to cook and love to have other people try my food (but then I cook cheap veggie nosh from fresh ingredients), but I can see how it'd be annoying.

Just tell her it pisses you off, keep things that don't have to be refrigerated in your room too.

Former Member

start nicking her stuff if she doesn't listen

Former Member

I'm scared of confronting her :nervous:

Former Member

spartaalbion wrote:

sounds like shes a couple of sanwiches short of a picnic

She'll be nicking them next !

Put some laxitives in the orange juice but tell the other flatmates then you will find out if it is her!!

Former Member

TheShyBoyInTheCorner wrote:

I'm scared of confronting her :nervous:

thats why you should ALL confront her together.

Former Member

TheShyBoyInTheCorner wrote:

I'm scared of confronting her :nervous:

like what Lypsy said or write her a note then she'll confront you and save you the job of having to do it.
I'd go for the group thing though.
Or everyone stop speaking to her until she asks why people are ignoring her!


dont listen to my daft ideas, im just amusing myself.

Former Member

don't feel bad about going into her drawer to find YOUR spoons. she clearly stole them from YOUR drawer. i hope you took them back!

and don't worry about talking to her, she clearly doesn't worry about being a thieving cow.

Former Member

I know it'd probably be a pain (and expensive) but is it possible for you to get a mini fridge so that you put your stuff in the fridge, which you put in your room? It might be a good idea to also lock your bedroom door as well.

Former Member

Sofie wrote:

I know it'd probably be a pain (and expensive) but is it possible for you to get a mini fridge so that you put your stuff in the fridge, which you put in your room? It might be a good idea to also lock your bedroom door as well.

that's what i said to my boyfriend when one of his house mates kept knicking his food (a 50 something alcoholic) and my bf is on a tight budget! But they shouldn't have to keep everything nailed down in a student house because someone keeps pinching stuff. You should all confront her. If it carries on then maybe you'll have to invest in a mini fridge or something.

Former Member

Put a couple of laxatives in the milk/juice :thumb:

We did that last year as someone kept drinking our milk and it soon stopped, lol!!

Former Member

Put laxatives in something edible then warn all your other housemates but her what you've done. Then when she gets sick - you know for sure don't you

ETA: Dammit, i only read the 1st page and got beaten to it!

Former Member

To echo what other people have said...

There comes a point where post-it notes and patronising signs around the place fail and strong words need to be had. Rather than a post-it note saying something like "Will whoever keeps nicking xyz out of my cupboard please not", have a house meeting and confront her about this. If you're sure it's her, then the meeting is the best way to do it as you make it aware to her that you all know she's been nicking stuff and that it vill not be tolerated.

Failing that, I like the laxatives idea.

I had one of those people in second year. We confronted him about it, things got heated, I called him a fat cunt (sic) and after that things were remarkably peaceful.

Former Member

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Former Member

Crocidolite wrote:

Oh yes. Fear and anger is the way to go.

What can I say? It worked. Criticize the method if you like, but you can't fault the results.

I may be a bit of a maverick, I may have bent the rules, but by GOD do I get results.

Former Member

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Former Member

SuzyCreamcheese wrote:

especially if you stick a few cornflakes round your mouth one day too with pritt stick and tell everyone you have herpes.

potw

Former Member

Kermit wrote:

It's theft, and she sounds like a nutjob.

I'd keep everything you own nailed down in your room- that's what we did. As for the butter and milk, a drop of green food dye never did anyone any harm.

I don't know how successful post-it notes would be- someone who nicks won't be deterred.

I kept most things in my room when i was at uni - The only things that were in the fridge were the obvious like milk and that - rice, pasta, cutlery, pots and pans, cerial and the like were all in boxes in my room.

just keep what you can in your room.

Former Member

We had a similar problem last year with one of the girls that lived here, shes moved out now thank god. She would go in my mates cupboard, eat her way through 6 packets of crisps, say sorry, ill buy them back, buy them back then do the same thing again! Why not just buy an extra pack for herself? I didnt really mind untill she started using my fabric conditioner...an denied it. When none the other girls all took thier washing home :mad:

House meeting is the way to go.

Former Member

Sofie wrote:

I know it'd probably be a pain (and expensive) but is it possible for you to get a mini fridge so that you put your stuff in the fridge, which you put in your room? It might be a good idea to also lock your bedroom door as well.

Thats all very well, and what iwas thinking, but then i thoughty, no why should he, he has the right to think his stuff is safe, especially in his own room! Id confront her, she has no right to do thats. what i buy is for me, you have budgeted for a ertain amount of juice to last a certain amount of time, and the money does build up. I think you should all confront her together.

Rant over. Sorry things like that really wind me up.

Former Member

In the kitchen we have cupboards with our room number on it, so its a safe bet we should put stuff in there. Just seeing how it goes at the moment, she's always really nice to me. I think she fancies me. Well not really, but she is friendly and so I don't want to embarress her or whatever, and I havent noticed anything going for the past couple of days, last thing was the orange juice.

I told my mum and she said she'd have a word :banghead:

Former Member

TheShyBoyInTheCorner wrote:

I told my mum and she said she'd have a word :banghead:

I shouldn't laugh!