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Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi!! this is my first post....i'm an 18 yr old girl, and recently unfortunately had a drunken one night stand with a guy who i have known for a few years. nevertheless, he is 25 and i'd assume quite experienced (but i don't really know his sexual history, or health). being drunk, we didn't use any protection. it's been over two months and now i am suddenly panicking about the possibility of having caught an std or hiv. i'm going to go for tests asap but how likely do u think it is that i could have caught hiv?? i have no real reason to suspect that he has hiv, as he is not in any of the 'risk groups'. but i know that is no guarantee. how likely is it??? and how common are unprotected one night stands?? please help!! thanx!

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Lara.

    The chance of you catching HIV a pretty small, considering you dont know, or don't suspect HIV/STD.

    The chances will be very small (e.g. you have to consider the average of HIV in the world which is like 1 in 5, and then the chances of contracting the disease through intercourse, which i dont know.)

    Go for the tests, which is a responsible thing to do.

    Hope this helps! <IMG alt="image" SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IOU2 a one in five chance is NOT pretty small. However, your chances of becoming infected with HIV from a single sexual encounter are not one in five in the UK.

    Having said that, it is obviously very important for you to put your mind at rest: http://www.thesite.org/info/sex/stis/

    Hopefully all the tests will come out negative, and I'm sure you'll be a much bigger fan of safer sex from now on.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    A 1 in 5 chance of HIV maybe. But your'e forgetting about the hundred or so other diseases which you can also catch.
    Get tested quick.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Lara and welcome to the site.

    I have been in a similar situation It is better to visit your local GUM clinic than your Doctor. That way you can remain annonymous.

    It may not bother you but if you visit your Doctor then any tests and the results will be recorded on your notes which (with HIV) could impact insurance premiums in the future.

    Also the GUM clinic is better equipped to give you advise.

    I was nervous when going for the tests but the staff soon put my mind at ease, they are very professional.

    It is better to find out both for your own peace of mind and for your future partners. It is only fair to all concerned

    Good Luck
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Just A Regular Guy:
    <STRONG>It is better to visit your local GUM clinic than your Doctor. That way you can remain annonymous.
    </STRONG>
    I would encourage anyone in this situation to go to their GP. GPs can offer a much more personal service, especially if you end up needing treatment for an STI. And your parents won't be told since the consultation is confidential (assuming you are Gillick competent).
    <STRONG>
    It may not bother you but if you visit your Doctor then any tests and the results will be recorded on your notes which (with HIV) could impact insurance premiums in the future.
    </STRONG>
    Test results are recorded in your notes but you do not have to delare *tests* to insurance companies. The insurance company is only interested in your pre-existing medical conditions (pre-existing conditions are nearly always excluded from health insurance policies). Besides, your medical record is completely confidential and you must give written authorisation before an insurance company goes anywhere near them. It is more usual for them to ask your GP to fill in a form rather than send the actual notes off for inspection, so the GP will decide what is declared (under your instruction).
    <STRONG>Also the GUM clinic is better equipped to give you advise.
    </STRONG>
    That's true and if it's only sexual health advice that you need than by all means go to your local GUM clinic.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    GUM clinics ARE better than doctors, as they are far more used to dealing with sexual illnesses and problems. Its also far more confidential- you dont even have to give your real name, as far as Im aware.

    AS for contracting something, its unlikely and the worrying is just your conscience telling you youve been daft <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by IOU2:
    <STRONG>Hi Lara.

    The chances will be very small (e.g. you have to consider the average of HIV in the world which is like 1 in 5, and then the chances of contracting the disease through intercourse, which i dont know.)

    <IMG alt="image" SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0"></STRONG>

    Just to allay a few more fears, the statistic globally is only as high as 1 in 5 as it is around 1 in 3 in most African states, it is (so I believe) 1 in 1000 in Britain, but if its isnt it is considerably smaller than 1 in 5.

    Please also DONT go to your Doctor/ GP. If you ask their advice it has to go on your record by law and this will affect things like life insurance etc. Go through your local hospital (phone 0845 46 47 for details I believe). This was you get the results equally as quick and you remain anonymous. This came from my ex-GP, who in actually fact covered me by not entering on my records.

    Take Care. Everyone makes mistakes,

    love RM
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just regarding Kentish's point, I am sorry to say (and I meant his respectfully) your advice is flawed.

    Insurance companies are not only interested in pre-existing conditions. Reason beingk, if you think you have exposed your-self before they will be worried you will again. You can refuse to let your doctor send a report or to leave something out but they must declare you have asked to do so, and in which case the insurance companies will increase premium anyway. Trust me, I worked for a life insurance firm this summer and I am a trainee lawyer.

    Go to your local GUM. They will do all tests. If it comes back positive then you consider it from there. My GP, the NHS Direct line and a doctor friend have all told me the same.

    Hope this helpss.
    Kind Regards
    RM
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Rego Mentum, you and I both have experience of insurance. Personally I have a lot of experience dealing with health insurance companies. Whilst you are correct to say the insurance company is interested in all aspects of your lifestyle, you will have to provide this information yourself anyway - your GP can't do that for you. All they need the GP for is to determine which exceptions to add to the policy, not how much the premium will be. That is determined by your answers to their medical questionnaires or your results from a private medical if they insist you have one.

    If you have treatment for an STI it would go on your medical record no matter where you had the treatment, and you would have to declare it before taking out a policy, otherwise the insurance company can refuse you cover - your contract with them will not apply if you have withheld information or put down misleading info.

    Life assurance is similar but there are differences.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kentishh, without wishing to extend this debate more than necessary, or to offend I, but you have over simplified the process.

    If an insurance finds out that you have been for a test, the underwriters of the policy will what is called a "medical loading" simply because they will be concerned of you exposing yourself again. Thats a fact, I worked with underwriters and it is well known by doctors.

    As for declaring it, on the questionaire it is likely to only ask if you have an STD/ STI. Therefore you wont misrepresent yourself.

    But they will either write to your Dr. or ask you to have a PMA (Personal Medical Attendance) report. In both circumstances the Dr has to declare you have been tested. At law you are entitled to see this report and refuse an entry being disclosed. If however you do so, the Dr can either refuse to submit the report at all or submit it, but must do so with notifying the insurance firm that you have insisted on info being withheld. In this case again the Underwriters will give a "med loading".

    All of this can be avoided by going to a GUM, who are professional, part of the NHS and completely anonymous. If the results are neg all is well and you lose nothing. If it isnt then you can consider going to your GP or the hospital direct.

    Sorry to all for the lengthy technicalities but something like this is important.

    Kentish, this is meant informatively and not adversarially. We all have experiences.

    Take Care.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Rego Mentem, your experiences are obviously different from mine and if you can more accurately represent the insurance company then fair enough. All I was saying is that IMHO and in my experience at the healthcare provision end of insurance, they are less likely to be concerned about the patient's past sexual history and more concerned about current medical conditions. (It all depends on when the policy was taken out of course - they are less bothered by a 50yrold's sexual past than a 20yrold's.)

    Anyway, I think we have exhausted this but I think this would be better placed in the politics forum.

    Getting back to the point, I still recommend the GP as the best option, especially if you are concerned about going to GUM directly. Remember if the GP needs to refer you to a specialist, they can do (if needs be). As I said, it really is a personal choice and as long as you are comfortable discussing sexual health problems with a medical professional then it doesn't matter where you get the advice.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by J:
    <STRONG>Insurance companies are money grabbing arseholes.</STRONG>
    FYI insurance is one of the most competitive industries and has some of the lowest profit margins. Insurance (esp. health insurance) costs a lot but that is due to the idiots who claim unnecessarily and the ambulance-chasing solicitors (Claims Direct) who are increasingly claiming for simple injuries like never before. [Rant over]
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Point of fact:

    Your rating with insurance companies will be adversely affected if your medical history shows that you have had a test for HIV. Even if the test returned a negative result.

    The reason!!!!being that they assume your lifestyle may be more risky (can you believe it??)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just to back whot has been said already Rego Mentem has a point.

    A few night ago late on radio one I heard ppl advising ppl to go to GUM clinics rather than GP's for the very same reason.
    Your GP grasses u up to insurers on request!
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