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moving unis
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
my and my boyfriend split up when i came to uni, i want to get back with him really bad but he doesnt think it will work cos of the distance, ive considered moving to one closer to home so we can be together.
how can i move from my uni to one closer to home? will i lose all my rent payments etc, and will i be able to start somewhere else or will i have to miss a year??
please help
how can i move from my uni to one closer to home? will i lose all my rent payments etc, and will i be able to start somewhere else or will i have to miss a year??
please help
Post edited by JustV on
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Are you realling willing to gamble with your education because of trying to get back with somebody you broke up with already? Is he willing to put in ANY effort or is it something you feel you need to do to make it work? Is he at uni himself?
Are you honestly even willing to miss out a year for that?
Yes, I'm quite cynical when it comes to reviving relationships these days.
Uni terms aren't that long really, I'd think very very hard before contemplating changing for a bloke.
Don't do it.
My situation wasn't exactly the same as yours (kind of your situation inverted, I suppose) but I actually followed my ex to the uni of his choice, and I can speak from experience that there is no way you should be basing decisions about your education on being close to someone.
I know it seems so absolutely tempting, but I have told you in past threads that I think you are doing all the chasing, making all the sacrifices and doing all the hard yards in this relationship while he sits back and make unsure noises and more than likely enjoys being pined over and pandered to so much. The bottom line is that if the relationship is going to be rekindled, and if it is going to work for the long-haul then it will do so. Don't change your plans for any man, no matter how strong your feelings are and the impulse to do it is. If it works out in the end it works out, but of course that would involve him making some effort and sacrifices too. He wasn't even willing to give a relationship a shot while you're at Uni and that speaks volumes to me about his committment to it, and you. But of course, you're the only one who knows what feelings have been laid on the table.
If you're determined to transfer closer to home then it's possible you still can. As Scary Monster said, you'll have to get in contact with the Unis yourself and see what they can offer you. My biggest concern really is that I guess with all these thoughts of your ex clouding your judgement you haven't even really given yourself the chance to enjoy being at the Uni you are, in the new city you're in, with the new people you're getting the opportunity to meet. I think that's a real shame; as I get the feeling this ex won't have slammed the brakes on his own life.
Good luck in whatever you decide to do, hun.
My best friend left uni after breaking up with her boyfriend a couple of weeks into her first term - she had to take a gap year and start again in year 1 a year later, she ended up doing a course that definately wouldn't have been her first choice. Plus obviosly your are unlikely to get any refund on your accomodation or tuition fees so you will have financial consequences as well.
I know how your feeling and i dont blame you for wanting to change uni, i'm in Wales an hr from my home an bf and i've thought about changing to another uni too but i just think if we split up it will just be a lot of hassel to go through for a bloke and at the moment we've just gone through a bit of a rough time, i'm mostly worring about him while i'm here, an its always me chassing him but anyway...
Do what evers going to make you happy but think carfully about if he is worth it and would he do the same for you?
Do not just change universities on the basis of being closer to your boyfriend. Being at university will totally shape your life from here on in.
It is possible to move universities. You will loose some of your rent if you’re in uni accommodation, you will probably loose all the money you have already paid. I spoke to the course leader of the new uni to arrange a transfer, but make sure you keep your current course leader in the loop also. You never know when you may need their help.
Best of luck with whatever you do, but put yourself first! It’s not selfish, its your future.
:thumb:
you will look like a sheep, imo.
when i started uni, i was with my boyfriend of four years, we split just after new years in my first year. i only live an hour away from home and was seeing him most weekends, but uni has changed me as a person and he didnt make the effort to come and see me, made excuse about distance and stuff. tbh, if he really wanted you, he would have at least tried to make it work with distance, its only three years. its your future, its your choice, dont let any man get in the way of that.
it wont werk
As others have suggested - wait a while. See how you do without him, see how he does without you. Join societies & hang out with your fellow students & make new friends. And consider if you really miss him because you love him, or whether you feel like breaking up with him is somehow severing a link with your home.
If HE doesnt think it will work because of the distance, then tell him to bloody move.
Dont sacrifice your education form something that may not even work. You only get one chance to make the most of university (unless your rich..)
Go see your tutor and they can look up unis close to home that do similar course. Dependign on the uni depends on whther you can transfer your credits so far. if youve got the same understandingoften they'll just let you join say 2nd yr....
if not you may have to start again or just base degree on creits for remainign yrs only. Ingore anythign obtained form current uni. Ive seen this happen when someones third year is 100% of degree.