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thats how i feel and i know its not right. people suck, get what they want and then its a cycle of being upset and jealousy etc etc. i dont think i'm looking in the wrong, i'm just too shy to ask. thats it.
still, thanks for your post. its kept me in good spirits
You definitely put women on pedestals and should try your best to recognise when you're doing it and try and look as objectively at the woman in question when you do. There's no way she's a more deserving human being than you, you just need to recognise in yourself that you're deserving of happiness and the thrill of human contact. While it's no bad thing to appreciate and adore women/a woman (as we are, on the whole, pretty fantastic
Do you mind if I ask how old you are? Also, where do you meet most of the women you do (or have) come into contact with?
its darned embarassing but i'm 23. yeh, seriously. i dont meet much women now. i used to at uni, where everything started going pear-shaped really. now its just at work. i guess i cant say anything else of note.
thanks for your interest tho :thumb:
Trumped! I'm 29 and my incompetence with human relationships is legendary. You are but a young stripling by comparison!
But is it really fair to pretend to be confident when your not? Kinda feels like lieing or something.
I've never met a person who openly goes up to strangers and says "look at me, I'm shy and vulnerable!", people just don't do that. We all hide our vulnerabilities, our weaknesses; it's just what people do and there's no dishonesty in the question. Dishonesty is when somebody asks you something and you bullshit, not when you pretend to be confident.
I've done it before.
When one of my best friends first rocked up at uni I thought she was far too good for me. This is not true, we also have the same not really liking meeting lots of new people. We both fake confidence when we have to.
I suggest you start faking it, because there aren't any other options it doesn't come from anywhere else.
thats what i can't do
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shit.
oh great, part of me thinks youre so right and the other part thinks youre not. i think i need a hug.
Trust me, I'm right, I've seen it in real life, I've had to do it in real life.
I used to be really shy & quiet & introverted (I still am really - I like to spend lots of time alone, but no point going out with friends if you're not gonna join in with conversation). But at some point during my teens I realised sitting quietly & passively gets you nowhere in life. I'd go up to people & talk to them, I joined in with stuff, I'd get up in front of a roomful of people & arse about, if a song I liked got played in a club I would dance even if the dancefloor was empty. At first I had to force myself to do these things, but over time it became second nature & I just do stuff & damn the consequences.
It's gotten me places shyness would have barred me from - I'm made new friends, travelled both within this country & to other countries on my own, DJed, made speeches, had fun, blagged a last minute place on a college course rather than remaining in a soul-destroying work placement, & just generally lived life.
When I tell people I used to be really shy most of them laugh & refuse to believe me cos I'm a real in your face extrovert with no shame who can talk the hind leg off a donkey (as my gran would say) when I get going. :thumb:
You have been told everything you will ever need to know TWICE in this thread. Stop whinging, start acting
Oh sorry, from the number of replies I thought this was the 'what are you listening to' thread...
You don't have to click on these threads you know.
And I'm soooo sorry that my problems aren't entertaining enough for you. :rolleyes:
Well you seem to take yourself seriously enough for the both of us. Thought I'd try and get a smile out of you.
But sadly it seems I'm about as funny as a Holocaust denier. There goes my career in stand up comedy. Perhaps I'll try my hand as a childrens party magaician...
I take it you're the oldest then.