If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
Playng the blame game?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Well things between my parents haven't been the best for a little while now, and in the past year it has quite badly deteriorated. They no longer communicate yadda yadda yadda, and on sunday, i think after a fight, mum asked my dad to move out.
I was at my sister's house at the time, so she told me- probably the best actually cos if mum had said it it would have gone completely the wrong way. I'd been expecting it- as much as I don't particularily want my dad moving out, I can see that their relationship is completely unsaveable and it will be a lot more harmonious for everyone if they don't continue to live together.
So i had a few days to think through it, and whilst I was a little upset- naturally- I thought that I was kind of okay with it, knew that it was neither parents fault (cos they're both damn stubborn n silly) and so although I was expecting to still be upset to not have too many problems with it.
However, today things have been a bit different. My dad went in for Day Surgery today. Dad doesn't drive, and for some reason- I think Mum suggested that he could get a bus to the hospital- my dad decided that rather than put my mum out and ask her to take him to the hospital and back, he would make other arrangements. which he did try to do. Mum got all humpy however, instead of seeing it as a way of him trying to make her life easier, she got all pissed off and took it as a horrible thing.
Dad's plans to be picked up by his friend fell through as he got into surgery late, so the friend called to speak to me and ask me to go pick him up on the bus. As mum is about and not busy I asked her if she could take me to get him, whereupon she pointed out that she has all this stuff to do etc etc. To which I said "oh so he was right to make other arrangements so as not to put you out from being busy" which then ensued into some sort of horrible fight/me being upset sort of thing.
So now i'm just meh. I don't blame my mum, but then on the other hand some of the ways she is acting right now are really not nice at all. I am very much a daddy's girl, but i can still see that he has played as much a part in this as mum, and i can accept that the two of them are just making life miserable for each other. So why can i talk calmly with my dad, but when it comes to talking with mum about it i have to get all defensive and then i get upset and everything. that five minute convo we had has now put me on a deflated mood. it's not fun.
I was at my sister's house at the time, so she told me- probably the best actually cos if mum had said it it would have gone completely the wrong way. I'd been expecting it- as much as I don't particularily want my dad moving out, I can see that their relationship is completely unsaveable and it will be a lot more harmonious for everyone if they don't continue to live together.
So i had a few days to think through it, and whilst I was a little upset- naturally- I thought that I was kind of okay with it, knew that it was neither parents fault (cos they're both damn stubborn n silly) and so although I was expecting to still be upset to not have too many problems with it.
However, today things have been a bit different. My dad went in for Day Surgery today. Dad doesn't drive, and for some reason- I think Mum suggested that he could get a bus to the hospital- my dad decided that rather than put my mum out and ask her to take him to the hospital and back, he would make other arrangements. which he did try to do. Mum got all humpy however, instead of seeing it as a way of him trying to make her life easier, she got all pissed off and took it as a horrible thing.
Dad's plans to be picked up by his friend fell through as he got into surgery late, so the friend called to speak to me and ask me to go pick him up on the bus. As mum is about and not busy I asked her if she could take me to get him, whereupon she pointed out that she has all this stuff to do etc etc. To which I said "oh so he was right to make other arrangements so as not to put you out from being busy" which then ensued into some sort of horrible fight/me being upset sort of thing.
So now i'm just meh. I don't blame my mum, but then on the other hand some of the ways she is acting right now are really not nice at all. I am very much a daddy's girl, but i can still see that he has played as much a part in this as mum, and i can accept that the two of them are just making life miserable for each other. So why can i talk calmly with my dad, but when it comes to talking with mum about it i have to get all defensive and then i get upset and everything. that five minute convo we had has now put me on a deflated mood. it's not fun.
0