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Was your first time painful?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok, this is gonna be quite graphic, but then I guess everything is here so it's ok!

Girls (and guys' girls, if you don't mind sharing), was the first time you had sex really painful? I'm gonna to, soon probably, but I'm pretty tight down there (that's the graphicness) and I'm worried that it's gonna just be a whole load of pain. I mean, due process and all, I don't mind. I'm just wondering how much it will hurt, how long it takes to get used to and is there anything I can do to help it?
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No, but I'd experimented a bit before :rolleyes:. Didn't bleed, neither. Strangeness.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well im a guy and it hurt me the 1st time 'cause i think i had a tight forskin but it got better every time after that. took about 3 times i'd say before it stopped hurting. its hard to explain the type of pain though, it wasnt in a way that i would consider painful, just sort of uncomfortable. Hope this helped.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It hurt my bf, though. He said it felt like his winky was being bent :confused:.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    didn't hurt me, but it hurt my girlfriend a bit. There was no blood though :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah it hurt like a bitch despite him being gentle. It wasnt messy but there were a few spots of blood in my pants after.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It always hurts the girls I have sex with ;) jk
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you put your fingers in your mouth and stretch your lips out (like a little kid), now stretch them a bit further! I'd say that's the type of pain I felt. The pain eased during the first time though I was sore for a few days after. I didn't remember any blood at the time, but I had spots in my knickers for a few days afterwards... Overall- a positive experience.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just tried that...ouch.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It was so painful the first time, I was crying but no blood, no pain for next few days or anything. And i hadnt *experimented* up there before. Next two times hurt a bit, but mainly for first couple of mins, the penetration part
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Mine hurt like hell. I bled quite badly too. It hurt for a few times afterwards as well. Gah.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yes it hurt quite a lot for me! so make sure the person you're with goes steady first off until it stops hurting. i didn't bleed though, just hurt a fair whack.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Wouldn't say it "hurt" as such, fairly uncomfortable for a little while and then it was fun. I know gals who had pretty traumatic first times, but I'll generalise and say that was more from a combination of not being ready and doing it in the bushes at the park. :p

    If you're turned on, relaxed and can trust your partner to take things slowly and be aware of how things are going for you.. then you shouldn't have any major problems or excruciating pains. ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes it hurt me quite a bit, but the guy wasn't exactly gentle :rolleyes:

    As long as you're gonna lose your virginity to someone you really like just ask him to be gentle, I'm sure he wont want to hurt you. Don't panic about it and try to relax, make sure you have plenty of foreplay first too and you'll be just fine. x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I bled loads and it killed! I didn't tell him I was a virgin either until he guessed by which point it was too late.
    foolish days back then!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When it was my first time it didn't hurt, just felt kinda uncomfortable for a little while, but then we had fooled around previously and i trusted him completely...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    H-face wrote:
    When it was my first time it didn't hurt, just felt kinda uncomfortable for a little while, but then we had fooled around previously and i trusted him completely...

    Thats the best way, I wish I'd been that sensible but hey I was young and stupid. :grump:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it hurt a bit at first and was uncomforable....but after taking it really gently it soon got better
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no it didn't hurt but i guess i'd fooled around a lot with him and the boyfriend before him before going that far so i was used to things up there. to put it nicely!!!
  • **helen****helen** Mod malarkist Posts: 9,235 Listening Ear
    I'm just wondering how much it will hurt, how long it takes to get used to and is there anything I can do to help it?

    Hi there,

    As you can see from what others have said - you don't have to take it for red that the experience "will hurt" although it is likely that you will feel discomfort - this is because sex is best when both people are relaxed and since losing your virginity can be a nerve wracking experience it can be difficult to relax.

    Generally though, actual pain usually depends on the relationship you have with the person you are going to have sex with. If you've explore each other's bodies before hand, if you have caring attitudes towards each other etc... then the chances are you are less likely to experience (intense) pain than with someone who hardly knows you.

    TheSite has a factsheet on ways to avoid painful sex

    Hope that helps - take care ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lipsy wrote:
    no it didn't hurt but i guess i'd fooled around a lot with him and the boyfriend before him before going that far so i was used to things up there. to put it nicely!!!

    :lol: Same, but i think that does help a lot though, i just found it more 'uncomfortable' by by the third time we got round to it, i was all fine and dandy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well the only girl I've had sex with which was a virgin just described it as being uncomfortable, not necessarily painful, she said it was quite painful to begin with, it then eased off and was just uncomfortable and then it was ok. It was fairly uncomfortable for her the first few times, we found using lubricant helped, the amount of foreplay didn't alter the uncomfortableness which was very wierd :S
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My first time hurt and I had a little bit of blood but nothing to worry about.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It was uncomfortable but there was no blood.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The first girl I was with bled a bit. To be honest it did freak me out a little. But I was just concentrating on how she was feeling, and she said that it did hurt a bit, but not too bad. After a few minutes she felt fine.

    Another girl I was with when it was her first time, she was very tense and nervous about it. It was difficult because she was worried and so she wasn't very relaxed down there. But once we got going she felt okay and soon relaxed and it was fine.

    Just take it slow, tell him how you are feeling, and if there's anything in particular you want him to do. If you don't feel turned on enough, then tell him to do more work first! Communication is the key. Most of all, just relax and don't worry :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It hurt my girlfriend, but then she went numb! We were lucky though, She'd had almost zero expirence with things up there, and while i'm not big, i'm not small. She said it really hurt her more a couple hours after, and even the next day.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It didn't hurt me and I didn't bleed either.

    Just take it slow and it should be ok.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yes
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    For women, any pain or discomfort is normally either due to possible tightness of the vagina, or it may simply be nervousness. For the men, it could usually be attributed to a tight foreskin, or again, nervousness could have its role. Believe it or not, men do get nervous thinking about sex and before it. Perhaps we're simply better at hiding that fact. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My first time did not hurt nor was there any blood. I felt a little discomfort the day after though.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    diddnt hurt at all!! no blood or anything...think it was ok sex an not bad conserding what people say.
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