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are men really this superficial?or is it just me going mad?!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ok..this is wierd because i've never put myself up for public scrutiny...but there are things about me i'd like to figure out u know?.....
i'm 21 going on 22...never had a serious relationship, cos no1: i dont get comfortable with guys that easy-meanin i dont think i could ever sleep with someone i didnt know as a friend, no2:iv always been really scared that my body's not that great.
i mean..plenty of guys ask me out..they say i hav a nice face..but honestly...i think my body sucks! tiny,miniscule boobs n ass..n this huge birthmark going across one of my legs...

iv always thought that if someone gets to know u, they wont really care abt ur figure....they'll just like u for u. but ive been proven wrong time n time again. specially in uni, my flatmate n her friend are gorgeous, n they're guys keep saying how much they love they're big boobs n asses...n this guy i dated for a bit wanted soemthing like that as well i think....he lost interest in me pretty soon, and i lost interest in him when i realized he might be just looking to get some!
i figured that to get someone else to be happy with my body, i hav to be happy with it myself...but let's face it...guys like big boobs n asses n thats the long n short of it....
i'm completely losing faith in meeting a guy who'd just accept my body for what it is....!!why cant guys just accept that some girls are just tiny..n its not a bad thing?!

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Be re-assured not all man are like that. there is some men out there that love women for more than there physical beauty but for their true beauty, their spiritual one.

    You just didn't had any chance until now, hang in there and you'll see that there is some good ones.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Big boobs and arses don't particularly do anything for me. I'm not into all that 'bootylicious' crap, and Jordan's tits make me wanna puke.

    There are a lot guys who like this stereotypical 'nice-looking girl' with big boobs etc. But there are also tons out there who don't, and even some who don't care either way. You WILL meet a guy who will appreciate you for who and what you are. Honestly!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh, and most guys don't like big boobs and ass, that's crap spread by rap stars. They like shapely boobs and ass, not big. Go into any club and you'll find that its the slim girls with small boobs that always get hit on first.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Your looking into it too much, and blaming your lack of success on your looks.

    Men like all different shapes and sizes. Some like fat girls, some like stick thin girls. Some like big tits, some like small. Some like blonde hair, some like brown. But you will find that the only men who seem to speak up about what turns them on is the ones who like the slim girls with big tits. You dont exactly hear men running around shouting "i love fat women and non existant tits" because it wouldnt make them that popular to their mates.

    Therefore you will be perfect to some men, but nothing special to others. Thats just life!

    Of course your friends boyfriends will brag about how much they love their gf's big boobs, they're not exactly going to say they prefer small ones (if they do) because it will upset their gf!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    tinydancer wrote:
    why cant guys just accept that some girls are just tiny..n its not a bad thing?!
    Bet every girl on here hates you now, for saying that. :D Trust me, almost all guys like small girls.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Most men who go on about big tits and nice arses are only doing it cos all the other boys are. Most guys don't give a shit. I personally don't have any body preferences like tits or ass or legs....if I find the girls face attractive then that's enough for me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Different people like different things.

    I like them to use real words, though :yum:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not all men are like that. like me most of my male friends dont care. I've always tried to get to know the person before anything happens (could also be one of the reasons i was single most of my college and uni life), so i never really pulled (i hate that phrase but you know what i mean) when i went out.
    What i'm trying to say (and badly) is that i've never cared what the person looks like, i go for the person not her looks. and i know that most men are the same.
    Keep looking he's out there for you somewhere. But in the mean time just have some fun and enjoy life. i know it can be hard at times, as i had the same problem by from the oppisite side of the coin as i wouldn't class myself as a looker and all my mates at uni got the girls
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Blah wrote:
    Your looking into it too much, and blaming your lack of success on your looks.

    Men like all different shapes and sizes. Some like fat girls, some like stick thin girls. Some like big tits, some like small. Some like blonde hair, some like brown. But you will find that the only men who seem to speak up about what turns them on is the ones who like the slim girls with big tits. You dont exactly hear men running around shouting "i love fat women and non existant tits" because it wouldnt make them that popular to their mates.

    Therefore you will be perfect to some men, but nothing special to others. Thats just life!

    Of course your friends boyfriends will brag about how much they love their gf's big boobs, they're not exactly going to say they prefer small ones (if they do) because it will upset their gf!

    Amen to all of that! :yes:

    A lot of blokes I know either prefer small tits, or just don't give a flying fruit as long as the gal doesn't look like Quasimodo. As for a small arse, personally I'd see that as a pretty good thing, and I know a lot of blokes would too. Focus on the things that are good about yourself, like your face as you said yourself. Tits and arse are not everything, not even close.

    Seriously, it takes all sorts, and you just probably haven't met the right bloke yet. By laying so much importance on your body and being so insecure, you're more likely to attract the kind of men who prey on insecure women and yes...they're often out to "get some" and not a lot else. There are a lot of fantastic men out there, be patient and keep your eyes peeled. ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Think about women like Keira Knightley - I have bigger tits than her yet every straight male i know would shag her silly.

    There's sort of a contradiction in what you say, that guys go after you just for sex. If that's the case, then why don't they go after big breasted and shapely arsed girls? Answer - because they find you just as attractive. People's tastes vary, so there's sweet FA to worry about. Just relax!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yup. Men like all kinds of girls.

    Sure nice big boobies and asses are good to look at and imagine things with but thats it. It doesn't make or break our decions of whther we are with a girl or not, and if it does then thoes guys are idiots.

    If its someone where going out with, then we want to be with them, who they are. Doesn't matter how big or small their boobs and stuff are.

    For me anyway.

    We don't have a standard girl. I mean me, the girls I have fancied an dhave relations with are all very differnt from each other.

    I have liked tall girls, short girls, thing girls, plump girls.

    The women I have been with have all had different sized breasts as well. No1 was the same and at my recollection I think there there has only been 2 girls I have done stuff with that had "big breasts", the rest were all small.

    I didn tcare hwat their breast or ass size was, it was who they were that mattered.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have to agree with whats been said.

    General good looks are more important than just tits and arse, of course people (both men and women) will make a judgment on wether they fancy people based on looks dont tell me you dont do it.

    You also said that youve been asked out by guys and theyve payed you complenents, but then you imply that guys are more interested in your flatmetes cause their gorgeous.

    Well firstly we cant all be gorgeous and its just a fact that those who are will get more of that kind of attention.

    You wouldnt be doing the same thing your accusing guys of doing would you ?
    Is it the case that the guys that have complemented you, you wernt relay interested in and the guys who go after your flatmates you are ?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    misunderstood!

    hiya,what i meant was that my flatmates' boyfirends always comment on how great big boobs n asses are, n thats why i started generalising all guys thinking that all of them thought like that. the guys who've asked me out did so without really knowing me...the thing is i seem really quiet, but really, when i get to know people i'm the joker of the group. most guys who've asked me out have done so thinking that im a quiet lil princess- when they get to know me a bit more they get a bit of a shock! (and yes, i haven't been interested in them either!)
    i wanted to take things slow with the last guy i dated,cos i didnt know him that well...i think that's what really put him off cos he wasn't the same after i told him i wanted to slow down!
    i'd prefer it if someone got to know me a bit before they asked me out cos i just find it difficult to get comfortable around guys i don't know..
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    its not just men who base people on looks....
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    cheers!!

    wow!..this forum's great...i've been at the receiving end of some great advice, and yeah, i'm goingto try and be not so self conscious about how skinny i am!but i know that it's going to be tough...in the end i guess it's all down to accepting yourself as you are..cheers to everyone for the great responses!
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