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raising a child does not demand a lot of money. as long as the child is safe, warm, clothed and fed, they are doing great.
my parents barely had two pennies to rub together when we were small, and we did just fine. we didn't have such luxuries as disposable nappies, or new clothes (they had been handed down 3 other cousins/siblings before they got to me), and my dad and grandma made/knitted most of our toys themselves, but we were healthy and we were happy.
it's easier to have money, yes, but it's not vital.
off the point totally, but it annoys me when people go on about how expensive kids are.
You can't keep asking me why I think "it would be beneficial for women to stay at home looking after the kids?" as THAT IS A DUMB ASS QUESTION. It is a dumbass question because:
a) Your basic comprehension skills are lacking
b) I am not going to defend a view I don't hold; only those I do.
c) Women or men who choose to 'stay at home' or wherever their caring takes place, should be able to do so as a concious choice without social and/or economic penalty!
Your arguement that 'you turned out fine' with no full-time home carer holds no water with me as I beg to differ. Also, you one person, what may (or may not) have been 'fine' for you should not define the rule.
And in response to your other 'query', not only have I already paid taxes, but I continue to do so. Do you think that my Grandmother, who's never paid ANY income tax, should not be entitled to a pension and bus pass? Or are you limiting your objection to the use of government funds in supporting those on a low income due to motherhood responsibilities?
I agree with you, it isn't money and luxuries that raise a child but it does take money to enable a child to be 'warm and safe', a roof over ones head, clothes and heating do not come for free. I also think that we should have a safety net to ensure that children and other vulnerable people do not live below the poverty line, it's unnecesary. This safety net is already in existance and supporting many, I just think the support system could do with a tweek.
She does not lack comprehension skills. You lack the ability to overlook the small inclusion of the word "women" rather than "a parent" in her question and actually respond to the question overall.
Why should people stay at home? When should they return to work? What about people who don't actually want to stay at home, what benefits in kind do they get?
Why? It's (generally) your choice to have a child. Why should the rest of society pay for your choice?
Largely an irrelevant personal insult, but to address the only valid point, what do you think defines the "rule" then, and for what reasons?
I'm not really sure how your gran fits in to any of this, I doubt she's going to be having children any time soon.
they also aren't THAT expensive. i dress myself and i feed myself and i heat a house, and i know what it costs. or rather, what it CAN cost if you need to save a little money. and it isn't the vast sum you were implying in the first post i responded to.
is it necessary that people like me have to live below the poverty line because so much of our income is taken away to support others?
i think benefits are necessary, but they are in place to support the needy, not just anyone who fancies having a child/not working and wants a free ride. so to propose that all mothers should be supported by everyone else, not only is it no workable, it's not fair. what would happen if every woman decided to have a baby? that's almost half your workforce gone, right there.
what?!?!
i was asking something about what YOU said.
can't be arsed with you anymore. it's like talking to a brick wall.
PROVE IT! QUOTE ME!
You are saying that "mothers should mother". How else can a mother "mother" their child in the ways you are saying they should be able to without staying at home to look after her children?
Your arguments are all flawed. You have no basic understanding of how the state works, you only have your cuckoo-land way of how you think it should work. Why should people get more support for having children? If they want to stay at home and look after their children then they should make themselves able to do so by saving beforehand and preparing for such an event. Why should they get a higher pension than those who have worked their entire lives? Why should they just get money thrown at them by the state? Money does not grow on trees. Wake up to reality now.
Like Kaff said, my family all lived on the breadline for my whole childhood, hardly any money, definitely none for the luxuries of new clothes, brand new toys etc. Not even at Christmas! And I had the happiest childhood of all my friends. You don't need shedloads of money to be able to get by in this world. It may help, but as long as you have love and shelter in a family then the rest is immaterial.
Give it up now.
Your "arguement" still makes no sense, and my comprehension skills are fine, thank you. I have re-read your posts many times over the last few days and you have provided no "evidence". I am not even sure what "evidence" you are trying to put forward. How exactly can a doctor or whoever "mother" your children?
What exactly *is* your argument? Maybe if you clear that up and improve your communication skills we would perhaps not jump to the conclusion that lucifer devil, mist, myself and probably countless others have jumped to. I am not even sure you yourself know.
Oh, and please don't come back with the whole "you lack comprehension skills" because, as I have already stated, my comprehension skills are just fine
Your so-called argument seems to change from one second to the next. Perhaps it is you with the communication problem, if so many people are not getting whatever it is you're trying to say.
What does that have to do with anything you've talked about until this point?
Your thread was about how little you get when you go back to work. It's no wonder that noone can follow you if you're taking off on such wild tangents.
Erm ... and this tangent comes from where, exactly?
To answer your point about the education system ... I am currently training to be a teacher and I am not going into education to "mother" children. I am going into education to teach children. Nowt else. And I bet if you ask any teacher they will say the same thing. If I was going into education to simply "mother" my class of 30 then I would stay at home and have my own children.
if your self employed ...what you being self employed about?
being self employed you shouldn't even consider working for less than fifteen pounds an hour plus any expenses ...and thats the very bottom line.
Using the definition from dictionary.com I do not regard teaching as "motherhood". I do not feel maternal to the children in my classroom and I doubt a doctor / pediatrician feels the same about all the children that comes into his/her care either.
are you a stalinist per chance?
I don't think so?(but I'd have to look it up to be sure, if I'm honest)?? But, I first adopted the term after reading some Marxist texts, and then more recent articles comparing the lower/working classes of Marxist's proletariat to the current 'new working class' of the middle classes.
thats my role.
your role is to educate.
All I'm saying is that 'educating' is part of the braoder term of 'mothering', I think most of the disagreement here stems from the use of and definitions of the term 'motherhood' and not from any points I've made.
Thank you for your support, and clear explanation. I thought I was going mad with everyone argueing with me and that I held some super-extreme view that though I thought was a common one, was actually obscure and obsurd!
smacks of very authoritarian social engineering to me.
the state will mother and father MY children ...not if i have the choice they won't.