If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
How to act in a club
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey, I just thought I'd ask this question as I have gotten advice from a few sources including this site and it all seems contradictory and I have no clue really on what do in a club.
I mean, say you want to pull, either for the sake of a kiss and a dance or maybe to find someone you really like and get their number so u can know them better later, what do you do?
I mean, on here it says that you should go up to the girls and chat to them, that all the reasons you say to yourself you shouldn't go are probably not true and you should just go up and talk to them but then I have gotten advice not to go up chat. That you should wait until they come to you, play it cool.
thing is I have done both, admittedly I havent done the going up and chatting much. Mostly I am with my friends and am very cool about it all but that gets me nowhere. When Ihave done the chat thing its never worked out, they have gone off or ignored me or talked to me then got off with another guy.
If you do go up and chat. What do you say? I hear you should show that your interested in them by asking them questions about themselves and pay a compliment. But then someone else told me you should never give them a compliment, shouldnt ask about them and just talk generally or even ask an odd question. Another person reckons you should insult them, well I guess not harshly but constantly wind them up and that.
Also, are clubs even good for finding someone anyway? I mean one one hand I heard they are bad places and you will never find someone in a club but then my mate met his gf of 3 years in a club. I was in one last night and plenty seemd to have their bfs with them and others you couldnt really tell, like one time their alone or with mates and next with a bloke. Also does the whole, just coming up behaind them and dancing work? u know just slipping the hands round and that? Coz I'd have thought that was presumptious but I have seen it work and even been told that girls like that?
I really would appreciate the girls opinions on this issue. Also any tips on finding a girl anywhere lol??? The usual routes of contacs is off for me and I aint working yet so thats out.
I'm a nice guy and I really would love to find someone I cna talk to, have fun with, be there for and have a relationship with but at 21 and never had a real gf and any thing I have ever had with a girl has ended fairly badly with me being hurt, used and rejected, hated even sometimes, I just don't know what to do.
I mean, say you want to pull, either for the sake of a kiss and a dance or maybe to find someone you really like and get their number so u can know them better later, what do you do?
I mean, on here it says that you should go up to the girls and chat to them, that all the reasons you say to yourself you shouldn't go are probably not true and you should just go up and talk to them but then I have gotten advice not to go up chat. That you should wait until they come to you, play it cool.
thing is I have done both, admittedly I havent done the going up and chatting much. Mostly I am with my friends and am very cool about it all but that gets me nowhere. When Ihave done the chat thing its never worked out, they have gone off or ignored me or talked to me then got off with another guy.
If you do go up and chat. What do you say? I hear you should show that your interested in them by asking them questions about themselves and pay a compliment. But then someone else told me you should never give them a compliment, shouldnt ask about them and just talk generally or even ask an odd question. Another person reckons you should insult them, well I guess not harshly but constantly wind them up and that.
Also, are clubs even good for finding someone anyway? I mean one one hand I heard they are bad places and you will never find someone in a club but then my mate met his gf of 3 years in a club. I was in one last night and plenty seemd to have their bfs with them and others you couldnt really tell, like one time their alone or with mates and next with a bloke. Also does the whole, just coming up behaind them and dancing work? u know just slipping the hands round and that? Coz I'd have thought that was presumptious but I have seen it work and even been told that girls like that?
I really would appreciate the girls opinions on this issue. Also any tips on finding a girl anywhere lol??? The usual routes of contacs is off for me and I aint working yet so thats out.
I'm a nice guy and I really would love to find someone I cna talk to, have fun with, be there for and have a relationship with but at 21 and never had a real gf and any thing I have ever had with a girl has ended fairly badly with me being hurt, used and rejected, hated even sometimes, I just don't know what to do.
0
Comments
And by the way, you're only 21...thats just a year older than myself, you're not quite at the stage of sitting alone on Christmas drinking egg nog and watching the Queen's speech on BBC2. Plenty of time to find a lovely lass.
I go in with the idea that im just out to have a good time with some mates, good music..good company..good drink!
But if im intending to pull..i'll wait till 1/2 way thru the night to find a girl that looks nice...
Like the other week ( before i got a g/f lol ) me and this girl ( she looked like Orla out of big brother..but more tanned..fuck me she was hot! ) were just giving glances over the floor to each other ( I was at the bar she was on the edge of the dance floor! )
I find just giving little glances with the occasional smile gets there attention..its then their decision as to whether invite you to dance or come to talk to you..if they come to talk to you..ask them if they want a drink! its the polite thing to do..and is almost a good enough ice breaker..you'll find that the chat should flow and things shouldn't be too awquard..
As to topics of conversation..hmm? Don't even bother with chat up lines! Just make a few jokes..a compliment I find is good ( nothing like your ass looks great in that mini skirt ) just something about her appearance..one I just thought of is maybe complimenting how she'd OBVIOUSLY made a big effort to come out tnite..that always makes em smile...or it does for me..
But just go with the flow
Chatting is always a good way to pull, its how I always managed it. But you can't really chat in a nightclub or pub with blaring music. You can't be heard, so it doesn't work in nightclubs. Don't use corny one-liners, but don't try and have a deep and meaningful conversation, because its impossible.
Smell good.
Smile, for fucks sake.
Arrive early.
Talk to the staff, get to know them.
Dance.
Stay sober(ish).
Avoid death row and walking around the club over and over again.
Buy NO drinks for women. It might go ok but many women love to get a bit of attention and a drink, I have a friend who makes a competition out of it with her mates. Women watch for this stuff and if you get burned by this it's more than likely all over for tonight.
Be friendly. Nothing sexual at all. The whole place is full of pissed up blokes with their tongues hanging out at the women on display. You might as well hang a sign out sayng "I have AIDS" if you join them for all the good it will do you.
Learn some visual jokes. No one can hear you, and no one cares either.
When being talked to - look positive. Nod, smile, appear cheerful.
Realise it's a lottery most pf the time. Take the piss out of the whole process "do you come here often?" can work if it's obvious you are taking the piss with it.
Look for women who have a friend getting off with someone else. Sorry ladies for this one, but you are very vulnerable to the ol jealousy when this happens and want some for yourself.
Ignore all dating advice that tells you you have to become a twat to get a girlfriend.
And have fun! Attractive people are those having fun. no one wants to stay around a miserable bastard or bitch, no matter how good they look.
chat them up and take them home!
...and if they don't want to go find another one that does. :yes:
Wear A Shirt (burberry)
FCUK jeans
White ICE Reebok Workouts (lol)
Smell good
rope ring on (old boy style)
Drink what you want but stay alive if you get me. (also gets the blood rushin in penis
Smoke a cig or joint if she is
go back to her apartment . If the light is on and she looks ugly then just treat her nice but dont do anything dodgy
if she is a virgin and is really nice then break her in
if she is ok but ure dick is not attracted then just make her feel like she is loved. Prehaps a wank or suttin never know mite get hard
then buss a nut if she is perfect girl lol
zzzzzzzz
Don't tend to take them home, I'm you're romantic charmer sort
how do you cath a girls eye? I mean have done it and gotten smiles back, like saturday night I did but it was lways one glance, one smile, thats it.
As someone said, if you go to a club, just to go on the pull, then your just going to look desperate and get no where! Just go to have fun, and mix in the pulling with that!
Another thing is, there is no point in going on the pull if you cant take rejection... I have been up to girls before and been blanked, or told to go away... Just be polite, walk away and move on! who cares? No every girl is going to fancy you or be in the mood to be chatted up!
I dont just go over to girls either, I think its always best to make a bit of eye contact first... 90% of the time this will tell you weather they want you to go over or not. As someone said, just give them a smile, something subtle!
Try to make them laugh... some girls I have pulled have been from stupid things, like me and a friend telling 2 girls we were identical twins and it was our birthday... he is and looks older and looks nothing like me... they knew we were talking bullshit, but it was funny and a good ice breaker... obviously this wont work too often, but its a break from the usual 20 questions or so you would open with....
ALWAYS make an effort in getting ready... just imagen your going out on a first date or something, you might not be going on the pull that night, but you never know whats going to happen!
Thats about all I can think of...
Just remeber to go out and have fun!! Pulling isnt the be all and end all of a night out clubbing! Its a nice bonus!
Other times If got out to "pull" i might get a snog but that'l be normally it.
Mates that do pull atll the time in clubs are normally very good loking or ararmingly thickskinned and persistant.
TWAT!
I've only once continued seeing a girl I pulled out on the town.
Who want's to start a relationship with somebody you've taken home after 5 minutes of metting them.
I remember my mates cousin pullign a 28 year old when he was only 15. Funny as fuck.
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go shawty- ish yo birthday
we gon party like ish yo birthday
We gon sip bacardy like its yo birthday
and u noe we dun give a fuck if that's yo birthday
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if you're into gettin' rubbed
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if u in there gettin rubbed
When i pull out up front u see the benz on dub's
When i roll 20 deep is 20 knives in the club
Niggas heard i fuck with dre now they wanna show me love
When you sound like eminem and the hoez they wanna fuck
But homie ain't nothing change hold down, G's Up
i see xzibit in the cut that nigga roll the weed up
If you watch how i move you mistake me fo a playa or pimp
Been hit wit a few shells but i dont walk wit a limp
in the hood when the ladys saying 50 you hot
they like me, i want them to love me like they love Pac
but how them new york, niggas tell ya im loco
when the plan is to put the rap game in a choke-hold
im feelin focus man, my money on my mind
got a mill. out the deal and im still on the grind
Now shorty said she feelin my style she feeling my flow
Her girlfriend wanna get bi and they ready to go..(Ya ok
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if u in there gettin rubbed
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if u in there gettin rubbed
Mah flow, Mah show, brought me the dough,
that bought me all my fancy things,
Mah Crib, mah cars, Mah pools, Mah jewls,
look nigga i done came up and i aint change
And you should love it, way more then you hate it
nigga you mad, i thought that you'd be happy i made it
Im that cat by the bar, toasting to the good light
You that ****** ass nigga trying to pull me back ride
When it dark, Well be pumping in the club, its on
now wit my eyes on my bitch, if she smiles, she gone
if the roof on fire, let that mothafucka burn
if u talken about money homie, i aint concern
imma tell you wat Banks told me cause go ahead switch the style up
if niggas hate, then let em hate n watch the money pile up
or we go upside ur there wit a bottle of bub
you know where we fucking B
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if u in there gettin rubbed
You can find me in the club,
bottle full of bub, look mami i got the X if you into taken drugs,
im in there having sex i aint into maken love,
so come give me a hug, if u in there gettin rubbed
ha ha ha ha
Dont act like u dont know who we be neitha' nigga
we in da club all da time nigga
if itz a problem pop off nigga
G unit
THats how you handle your self in a club if your a famous millionair rap star for the rest off us well ?
or if your not a famous millionaire rap start, people tend to handle themselves like this
Go Go........Go On Love Its My Birthday!
You Look Tarty Love Its My Birthday!
I'll buy you a barcardi love its my birthday!
and you know I'm having a laugh its not my birthday!
[Chorus x2]
you can find me in the pub with a pint of bud
look love i've got a fiver if you let me see your jugs
im in to playing to darts, i aint in to growing shrubs
so come fill up my mug before my fag gets stubbed
when i pull up out front you see my vauxhall nova
when i hit the bar its ten pints before im over
i came to watch the game cause im a blackburn rover
and im munching M&Ms while im downing smirnova
but only nothings changed cash down bottoms up
and i got a papercut from rolling my rizla up
if you watch how I move you'll mistake me for a geezer or gimp
cause I fell down the stairs and now walk with a limp
in the back bits of Watford they say fifty you hot
they like me i want them to love me like lesbian hot
but go in to Hemel-Hempsted they'll tell you im crazy
cause i once got drunk and humped the statue of a lady
but im fully focused nowwww
tea and coffee on my mind
got a part time job in the daily grind
and this girls yeah
she loves my hair
she likes my car
her friend is fit but she's as ugly tooo riiiigggggghhhhhtttttt
[Chorus x2]
my girlfriends mum give me the cash
that bought me all my fancy stuff
my couch, my fridge, my plates, my waste
look mate im tied down but i aint changing
and you should love it way more than i hate it
your like my dad fashion sense is outdated
im that bloke by the bar when im on my round
your that weird guy who never leaves or makes a sound
when the beats start pumping i get my macerana on
my mates drag me to the chair before the end of the song
if the roofs on fire someone dial 999
and you wanna get frank love
it isnt a crime
i'll tell you what i tell every girl
your fit
nice hair
if you dont wanna rush it here's another red square
or i can tell my mates to be round the back with a kronenberg
they'll know where we've ****ing been [YEAH! Laughs]
[Chorus x2]
dont act like you dont know where i been either mum!
in the pub all the time mum
its about to pop off mum
burn unit
Not being funny or anything fella, but weren't you asking for advice on shagging your missus about a day ago!?!