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Too fat to do it

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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Im in a long term relationship and my bf likes to have sex with me now and again. The thing is i think im to fat and when me and my bf do it i dont want him to look at my bod. he has lots of posters of skinny modles on his bedroom wall, which makes me feel fatter. Im trying to lose weight at the mo and its going well but im scared my bf will hate me if i keep putting sex off. is it just me or are other girls like that too? please help me sort this out.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You have been with your bf for a long time so he must find you physically attractive or he wouldnt still be with you. I know how you feel cos im the same, but you could try talking to him about it. It shouldn't be that hard to talk to him if you've been together a while.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I’m very self conscious about my weight but my bf makes me feel beautiful, he’s always saying he wouldn’t go out with some1 who was ugly or fat. When we do it he kisses my body all over <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Aww, your bf wouldnt be with you if he thought you were fat or ugly. Just because he has pictures of models on his wall doesnt mean he wishes you looked like them; it doesnt feel like it to girls, but pretty girls are just scenery. Nice to look at, but thats it. He wouldnt be with you if he found you ugly, and didnt find you incredibly sexy and beautiful.

    But if it helps you try it with the lights off, it can be far more sensual.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would ask him to take the pics down, in a long term relationship it is disrespectful, I no longer have pics of half naked men up now I live with my b/f.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just relax and be yourself he loves you the way you are

    and if it makes you feel more confident as u say lose a bit of weight

    i mean if he didnt like looking at youre body he would not have slept wth u
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i feel exactly the same but my bf says that he doesnt care what i look like because he loves me and im sure your bf feels the same, try not too worry too much <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you should have sex like bunnies. It's a great way of exercise!

    I know someone who was a lil chunky, then he had a long term g/f and the weight just disappeared! Now she's gone hes starting to put it back on tho lol.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know exactly how you feel, i am so self conciouse(sp?) about my body and i always feel like everybody is staring, but i talked to my boyfriend and he reassured me that he loves me and if he didn't he wouldn't be going with me i think the best thing is to talk to him about it, it will make you feel loadsbetter and it might bring you closer <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    <IMG SRC="tongue.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="eek.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    Thanx everyone for the advice on what to do!!

    <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah i think its not just girl that don't like there body, Blokes can be the same, but if you(yourself) are unhappy with it you can change it, but don't change for anybody else!! <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Like other ppl have said, for your boyfriend to be going out with you in the first place, he must find you attractive. <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    Don't get too paranoid about the way you look hun, if the pictures on his wall make you feel more self-consious, then just tell your man how you feel. I'm sure if he knows how you feel about them he'll take them down straight away.

    Try not to worry about your body, your boyfriend loves you for you,and thats the biggest compliment anyone could have. <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no woman is as fat as they think they are!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know how you feel, i was really paranoid bout sleeping with my boyfriend for fear of being too fat as well. Thing is as other people have already said, your boyfriend loves you for who you are so don't worry!! And yes us girls often think we are fatter than we are,so chill out it'll be fine. <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey everyone, i'm new and understand what you are talking about. When i first started going out with my boyf i was really self concious about my body when we first started to get inimate. He is great though and always tells me i'm beautiful! I thought it was just me, but now, 7 months on i've found out that he is as insecure i was and i never even knew it!
    He always seemed so confident, but now he's going to the gym and playing football with his mates alot.
    But like everyone's already said, he wouldnt be with you if he didnt find you attractive.
    So try and relax and enjoy the sex!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm like this too. If you feel negatively about yourself some ways to make yourself feel good are to do the whole eat healthily thing and a little bit of exercise. Dunno why but this made me feel all good. Once again the reason for this is probably my being a bit loopy <IMG SRC="confused.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
    I always used to try to hide bits of myself when I first started shagging me latest bloke. Oh dear. But I kind of got fed up with that. Cos obviously he wouldn't be with or have sex with you if he didn't like your body.
    Although, I do understand these gorgeous thin women are intimidating they are just fantasy, well I think they are <IMG SRC="confused.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> The same way pictures or posters of gorgeous blokes in magazines and that are fantasy.
    I actually read something in the magazine I got the other day about what positions to do it in to hide big bellys or make your boobs look kinda bigger.
    Dammit, I wish i knew where I left that....
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by * k-t *:
    <STRONG>I would ask him to take the pics down, </STRONG>

    I agree with that. If you feel thats the problem then tell him to lose the posters. Simple <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    My girlfriend was very conscience but her body at first but now after 16 months together she's happy. If your boyfriend is gonna go say things about you to his mates then he ain't worth it - and it doesn't sound like your b/f would do that <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think 90% of the girls reading this will relate to you. I'm a size 10 and I'm self concious of my thighs and the rolls on my tummy, hate taking my clothes off in day light. It just shows we all have insecurities and it takes time to trust someone and be 100% comfortable.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is this the whole reason why girl perfer to do it with the lights off???

    or is it another reason?? Sorry to change the subect of the post..but i always wanted to know why girls like the lights off

    *wonders if its to do with his own body* <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I just like doing it in the dark. Can't explain it really. But thats just me. <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
    I suppose the fact that it means my bf can't really see much is a bit of an advantage for me. Makes me feel like I can enjoy myself a bit more without the worry of what he's thinking of my body.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As you can see, most people feel that way about themselves. I have problems with the way I look. My weight seems to go up and down, it p's me right off. My boyfriend loves the way I look, so that is a help. I tend to put on weight when I am unhappy, I eat for comfort. I have lost a stone over the last 6 weeks, but now I am bored with trying to lose weight. I am finding hard to get back into it. I don't judge people on how much they weigh, but I judge myself - I feel a group hug coming on <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> (((( ))))
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes i am all for a group hug if it helps!! <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    but i think for your 1st few time you need the lights on to get to know eachother bodys
    the whole eatting a girl out use to put me off because i couldn't see what i was doing very well, i am good now at it but that because i ask(begged her) to leave the lights on.....i must say she was not very relaxed but she had alot going on in her life at that time

    anyway....so how do you get more girl to leave the lights on then?? (maybe not all the time now and then)

    think i should re-ask this Q when i get a girlfriend <IMG SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> ....
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I felt exactly the same wen me n my boyf started avin sex.The reason i av sex wiv him is becos i feel comfortable wiv him seein me the way i am.I am very concious about my weight and how he sees me, but if he had a problem wiv it then i dnt think he'd b wiv me...so thats the same for u n ur boyf!If u feel really insercure about it then mayb u shud tell him n then he can reassure ya about it. xxx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey There,
    It seems that you have something that a lot of teenage girls seem to have now-a-days...low self-esteem.
    If your boyfriend and yourself you are both having sex then he must love you very much and that is the thing that should matter. Many teens go on diets that are not needed because they aim to be like models on posters all around the world.
    If you are serious about loosing weight then do it the smart way, consult your local family doctor and let him/her give you a proper evaluation of what you have to do (or don't have to do!)
    One thing to keep in mind is that your boyfriend can have a million posters of a million girls (which mist guys do!) but it is you he cuddles up too at night. Just remember that.
    Good luck.

    Jackson
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    tell me bout it it makes me feel really bad so i just ask them to take them down and they normaly do just tell him how u feel and then u will c that in his eyes ur pretty even if u dont feel it at times <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> just keep smiling <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you cant be that fat or he will not be able to do it with you. dont stree over losing weight do it at your pace, you will find it is easier and quicker that way.
    Most men do not like skinny women anyone, apparently it is the first stages of turning gay.
    chill girl cos big is beautiful <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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