The stone man

Former Member

First, let me introduce you to the Stone-man, so you get to know a little more about him. The Stone-Man is a little guy who lives in your brain. {yes that's right. In your brain}. That's impossible you say? Never, let me tell you how he gets there. The first time you smoke marijuana is a special time. As you look back at it you probably, think, "hey I didn't even get that stoned my first time." Yes that is to be expected, but this first smoke starts something very important for the rest of your stoner life. When the THC first gets into your brain, it starts a chemical reaction, which transforms a certain section of your brain into a little chubby man. This, my friends is the Stone-Man. In the first few times you smoke the Stone-Man grows a little bigger and adds on to his new home in your brain. The Stone-Man takes up about five percent of your brain. Five percent of unused brain. You only use about ten percent of your brain, but when you're stoned, the Stone-Man opens up another five percent. This five- percent usually contains a greater understanding and appreciation of art, but it also opens up a section of non-motivation. "How is this possible?" you may ask yourself. It just is. Well enough with the scientific stuff let me tell you what happens when you get stoned.

When you smoke weed lots things happen in your brain. The Stone-Man gets off his lazy-boy, stands up, stretches, and checks out the situation. He then walks up to this big red button in your brain marked "THE STONE BUTTON" depending on what type of weed you have smoke, the Stone-Man hits the button with a different amount of force. If you smoke some dank bud the Stone-Man may push the button lightly, then get pissed-off and turn it off and sit back down. Or you may get yourself some teaser weed, the big guy will get all confused and push your button in and out, till you don't weather your stoned or if you need to hit the bong again. When you get some nice weed that makes the stone man really happy, he punches the button and you get fried. And on the occasion that you got some kind, sticky red-bud, the Stone-Man breaks out this huge club. And on the club "STONE-STICK" is written. He proceeds to slam the button with it and vois -la, burnt toast.

I believe that listening to good music when your stoned is a natural human instinct. A built in response to being stoned. And the reason why you need cool music when you're baked is so the Stone-Man can dance. When you listen to cool music the Stone-Man likes to boogie all over your body. That's why you get chills and tingling sensations when you're burnt. But if you don't like the tunes, and you don't like the situation your in, or if you get too stoned, the Stone-Man freaks out! Then you wig..

This is an unfortunate problem, but one we stoners must deal with.

So next time you smoke a joint, hit a bong, toke on a bowl, remember that little guy up in your head and treat him with some respect. And be sure to tell everyone you know about there little friend. The Stone-Man.


By: Rufus McCooter and Smitty McCrakin

I like this theory

Former Member

I like it too, does the stone man get hungry after a while because of his activity ? that'll explain munch <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">