Please help a newbie on the dating scene

Former Member

I'm nearly 20 and have just split up with my first boyfriend after 3 years. I'm at uni, but have never been on the dating scene before and haven't a clue how to go about meeting new guys, etc. I don't understand how people just go up to attractive people in clubs and "pull them". Besides, I would to get some nice dates of this, not just some random, drunken snogs...

Help!!!

Former Member

Most clubs I've been to have been terrible places to start a relationship.

Bars are slightly better, though there is the drunken element to deal with.

I would suggest you join a class or two, learn to salsa or paint or something.

That way you will meet people and be able to talk to them.

Former Member

vick_stitch wrote:

I'm at uni, but have never been on the dating scene before and haven't a clue how to go about meeting new guys, etc. I don't understand how people just go up to attractive people in clubs and "pull them". Besides, I would to get some nice dates of this, not just some random, drunken snogs...

Pulling sounds like a terrible idea to me. I have never seen or heard of any couples that have met in places like bars and pubs. Try concentrating on your friends, one could become something more than a friend. But I would have thought uni was a great place to find someone!

Former Member

yeh I thought that too, but I guess I'm just too inexperienced to know where to start. I think my friends are out of the question as far as them becoming boyfriends are concerned, but joining a class sounds good. I think I'll go along to the uni dance classes soon. Any other tips????

Former Member

Dont go out looking for HIM, if you know what I mean, just go out and meet people of all types, socialise, it will happen.

Canterbury uni has fist fulls of clubs, societies etc. I'm sure there is one to your taste.

Plus you could always go to the club there (whats it called again), God thats a shite hole, all those stairs, its a death trap.

Former Member

Yeh I know I should just let it happen. It's just quite hard to get used to. The club's called The Venue- it is a shit hole, but there's also The Works in town, but some good clubs like Alberry's, The Loft, The Penny, etc.

It's weird, coz with my relationship went all my confidence. I suddenly feel unattractive and fat again, like I did before I met my boyfriend.

Former Member

If you go out looking for blokes, chances are there wont be any!
Just go out to have a good nite and a laugh!
Lots of blokes are attracted to girls who are happy and smiling and having a good time.
Not the best place to meet a potential bf, but always good for a few random nites lol

Dont feel bad about yourself! You will learn to feel good about yourself. Until you love yourself, its hard for someone else to.

Former Member

The Venue! Yes, of course, I could picture the place I just couldnt name it, has that stupid lighthouse on the top. Odd. Last time I was there (the only time) there were large groups of drunken girls singing along with the weather girls, scary.

Anyway, as others have said, dont go out looking as such, just go out to enjoy yourself, join a few societies and clubs about campus. Kent uni is bloody massive I'm sure there is loads going on.