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afraid...


This message is gonna sound really messed up I know, but it's true.

I've realised that I'm afraid of people, not so much people... more relationships. At the same time I'm afraid of being alone in public places (which is why I never go in the commonroom alone).

I don't understand why I'm like this, I just don't seem to feel comfortable around anybody, except 4 my family. I don't trust anyone and I'm reluctant to get to know people past a superficial relationship.

I can't communicate my feelings except for on paper and I find it hard to take or pass a compliment. All I want to be is on my own, but at the same time, I want somebody to talk too...

As I stepped to the edge
beyond the shadow of a doubt
With my conscience beating
Like the pulse of a drum
That hammers on and on
Till I reach the break of day...
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I just wanted to say something, so that you would know the your post was here.

    Unfortunately I can't offer any advice to you Liberty, because I've never been where you are & so I have nothing to draw on.

    I am thinking about you though.

    j9
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    {{{{{{Liberty}}}}}
    I have to be honest to say I'm not sure what this sounds like, it could be socialphobia, it definately sounds like a phobia of some description.

    Appologies if I'm wrong but if my senile memory serves me right you've suffered from depression and self harm right? In which case do you have a councellor or a psychiatrist or CPN? if so speak to them if you can't find the words to express yourself try writing it down on paper or here (and print your posts up, if you don't have any of the afforemention healthcare professionals consult your gp and he/she will refer you to the apropriate person, who possibly look at some confidence or assertiveness or self awareness type therapy which although can be hard, can be very rewarding.

    not sure if that's much help but I do urge you to speak to your healthcare professionals and seek the help you deserve. If there's anything we can do just ask, you know where we are!!!

    Take care Liberty
    Luk

    The river is wide and oh so deep. I've been walking around in tears, No answers arethere to get. Cause between this world and eternity there is a face I hope to see
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hiya liberty,
    i kinda relate to u, but i think mines more of a confidence thing, i hate goin shoppin on my own, i feel as if every1 is lookin at me etc, i also hate walkin in2 crowded rooms alone. and im the worst person in the world at recieveing compliments, i just cant take em, i tell people to shut up & stop talkin shit, not horribly.
    do u think urs could b due to confidence aswell?
    loadz a love helen
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