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Pregnancy: What would you do?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm not asking what you would actually do if you / your partner became pregnant, I'm asking if you have talked about it with your bf / gf? Do you know your partners' feelings about abortion / adoption, etc?
Amazingly (some might say), I haven't yet slept with my bf of nearly five months - before anyone says it, not because there is anything wrong with our relationship at all, we're blissfully happy, thank you very much (too lengthy to explain!) - but I probably will soon and the contraception question is soon to arise.
I am already on the mini-pill, take it religiously etc and have no worries about that. I've slept with three other guys in the past - two were virgins and one had had (many!) other partners and hence we used condoms too (didn't with the first two) - so plan to get myself tested just for my own peace of mind soon. My bf has had one other partner and always used condoms.
I have just been giving some thought to what would happen if I were to become pregnant - obviously I don't intend to, but accidents happen. With past partners, I would have had no quarms about having an abortion for my sake and no body elses - I honestly (and shamefully!) wouldn't have given a thought to what they wanted, let alone acted on it. But now I'm with someone I really love and can see us having a long future together, so I would of course think long and hard about what to do if it were to happen... It's not exactly "practical" as he's away at uni and I'm living at home (100 miles apart) and at the very beginning of my career, but obviously some things you just have to get on with, practical at the time or not!
So, anyway, back to the question... have you discussed it with your partner or are you of the "it won't happen to me / I'll cross that bridge if/when I come to it" mindset?
Sorry to ramble - but you can't say I didn't answer my own question!
Amazingly (some might say), I haven't yet slept with my bf of nearly five months - before anyone says it, not because there is anything wrong with our relationship at all, we're blissfully happy, thank you very much (too lengthy to explain!) - but I probably will soon and the contraception question is soon to arise.
I am already on the mini-pill, take it religiously etc and have no worries about that. I've slept with three other guys in the past - two were virgins and one had had (many!) other partners and hence we used condoms too (didn't with the first two) - so plan to get myself tested just for my own peace of mind soon. My bf has had one other partner and always used condoms.
I have just been giving some thought to what would happen if I were to become pregnant - obviously I don't intend to, but accidents happen. With past partners, I would have had no quarms about having an abortion for my sake and no body elses - I honestly (and shamefully!) wouldn't have given a thought to what they wanted, let alone acted on it. But now I'm with someone I really love and can see us having a long future together, so I would of course think long and hard about what to do if it were to happen... It's not exactly "practical" as he's away at uni and I'm living at home (100 miles apart) and at the very beginning of my career, but obviously some things you just have to get on with, practical at the time or not!
So, anyway, back to the question... have you discussed it with your partner or are you of the "it won't happen to me / I'll cross that bridge if/when I come to it" mindset?
Sorry to ramble - but you can't say I didn't answer my own question!
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LOL That's how I feel!
In fact, last time I went to see my Doc for my Pill check-up, I couldn't see my usual Doc and the one I did see said that I "seemed like a very sensible young woman, for whom it wouldn't be the end of the world if she were to get pregnant but obviously didn't exactly want to right now"!! Hmm... :eek2:
Yes we have several times.
Yes I do:)
the jist was that it was utterly the wrong time, but we would keep it, and we would cope.
I've been on the pill for a while and take it pretty much exactly the same time every day. I've only ever missed 2 I think, and both times I used condoms and so on, plus I'm careful if I'm ever sick or have stomach upsets and so on. I think if I still got pregnant after being as careful as I could, then I might try and look at it as a sort of 'fate' thing... like well if I somehow got pregnant despite all the odds then maybe I should accept that destiny.
I really, really don't want to be though!
I think my boyfriend would support me whatever I chose to do, although I don't know what his actual strong preference would be.
He says it would completely cut him up and he would never get over it.
I really hate this situation and constantly worry about pregnancy because of him, if he didn't think like this i would get an abortion probably without a second thought (not to say it wouldn't affect me).
I think our views have alot to do with him being 22, with a stable job etc and me being 18 just started at uni...
I like that...hehe.
We haven't discussed it...then again we haven't had sex. Yet.
I really don't know my own views on it at the moment. I'd hate to have an abortion just because it wouldn't fit in with my life right now, but then I'm only 16, and I've just started college, and it would make my life hell.
God...I really need to think about this...
Myself and my current partner of three years have talked about it, and we've agree that although an abortion would in theory be the best thing, we don't know if we could go through with it because it would be "our" baby. We are very much in love and want to have children together when we are older, so it get rid of a child now would be extremely difficult. We're both 19 at the moment and living at home, I've just started uni and hes just about to enter the police force so the timing would be very poor.
I can't really say for definite what we would do if the situation arose, I will just keep being very careful and pray that it never does
I would have to say, haven't thought about it, at the moment I wouldn't know how I would react, But I would support any choice My girlfriend made. depending what she wanted.
I know it would be hard right now if i did end up pregnant but we'd find a way of coping.
Well, maybe not for a few years anyway
There is no way either of us would consider an abortion or adoption. If it happens, it happens. To me, a child is a blessing (they can pay for your nursing fees when you're 90
You definitely seem to have your head screwed on the right way:yes: I think it is very mature and commendable that you consider all actions and their consequences AND you act upon it too.
I definitely think it is very important for you and your partner to discuss these things together. For the sake of your relationship you should be honest on all levels and as both of you will be involved it's important not to leave him out of your decisions (or opinions for that matter). Anyway it might be better to know what his view on things is before you even open yourself to such a situation.
theSite has a helpful link if you'd like to have a look
Pregnancy and stuff
Take care!
the only thing ive ever said would be if i found out there was a possibliity of me never having kids in the future that would get me re-thinking things a bit.