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"I'm a virgin"...no honey...you're not...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
My ex, from a year ago, went to a get together I couldn't make recently, all my friends there etc...me and him still get on great! We're like, fuck buddies, when both single, and well we were in a relationship for a year and a half, after 9 months of which, we (both being virgins) started having sex for like, 9 months obviously and off and on for a year after we split. So at this doo, he's bragging bout all these girls he's snogged...then when discussing with a couple who are like, waiting to have sex when they're married, he told everyone "Of course, I'm happy that I'm still a virgin"...now, this all comes back to me, even after a yr split I still have to hear everything, don't really want to, but this came back to me and I was like...well I thought- some of these friends are my life long friends, he's abandoned them for a year to make totally different friends, comes back rarely for doos, to brag about his latest conquests and likes everyone to know he's a virgin...it leaves me :eek2: . We had/have a great sex life...why is he lying, I mean fine if he doesn't want to discuss what we did together, but to openly and blatently lie and say he's a virgin...am I something to be embarrassed about? Just sorta...made me wonder. We were the bestest of friends and when we do get to see each other, the time together it great...so...why?! I mean, why deny something which everyone knows we did, and like, well...WHY?!

It just bothered me because at the time, he was the world to me, someone I trusted, felt glad to lose my virginity to but like, now it's like something he is denying-something really huge in my life and something that took of a lot of trust building and alot to achieve because, well I had a shitty relationship before which really...scarred me. And to have something special...wiped from existence in his mind?! I don't understand...any ideas?!!

Malt Munk xx :)

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well least hes not telling people your a slut/whore.

    but i have an idea where your coming from because my ex/whatever he currently is never really likes people knowing what we've done.

    but they are men and at the end of the day confuse me so i dunno
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't know this guy too well but it sounds kind of lousy what he's doing. If he really cared about what you thought he shouldn't hide the fact that he is no longer a virgin with other people. If it was a special experience for you that's all that counts. He is just lessening a special experience to probably impress other people in some regard about him still being a virgin at your cost it seems. I can't understand how a guy could live with himself after going around and doing that. I know it probably hurts but don't let a jerk get you down
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wow, a born again virgin!
    Id definitely mention it to him, tell him you were almost certain that what you did could be defined as sexual intercourse, therefore negating his virgin status immediately.
    Ask what his problem is. would he ever admit it if he slept with anyone else? What if he got with a virgin who then thought they had lost it together but she was being fooled.
    Are you actually sure he was a virgin when you slept with him - maybe theres somebody else hes in denial about?
    I cant really answer your question. just add more questions to the equation.
    it sounds like a bit of a weird thing for him to do.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah he was definitely a virgin, merely cause we were young when we started going out, and he was one of the blokes who if a girl breathed near him he'd clench up and go bright red- incredibly shy.

    He's always been renound for being really level headed and mature and this feels really out of character. I don't know if he's been with other girls since, but yeah, being so close, it's hard to comprehend.

    Thanks for the responses!

    Malt Munk xx :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well, just an idea, but next time you see him when you're both single+if he wants to sleep with you say something like "we'd better slow down, i dont want to rush your first time" That way you can open up the conversation and find out exactly why he feels he needs to lie!!
    Hu, men!!!
    SBG
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by spongebobsgirl
    well, just an idea, but next time you see him when you're both single+if he wants to sleep with you say something like "we'd better slow down, i dont want to rush your first time" That way you can open up the conversation and find out exactly why he feels he needs to lie!!
    Hu, men!!!
    SBG

    Lots of miscommunication can happen between men and women. Guys and Girls can tend to think on different wavelengths leading to loads of frustration and bad feelings. But I'm a guy and I can't even figure the point of doing something so hurtful to someone you fancied. :confused:
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