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if ur any gud wit personal probs then plz get intouch

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i got a prob and need peoples advice if ur willing 2 help
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's normally better to post what your problem is, otherwise people will think you're a bit odd. Or are you just wanting ot be contacted via the PM system?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    either but wud prefer the pm system
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You are more likely to get more help if you post your problem.
  • SkiveSkive Posts: 15,282 Skive's The Limit
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    either but wud prefer the pm system

    I suggest letting people get to know you first before asking them to PM you.
    And txt talk won't do you any favours.
    Weekender Offender 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    its kinda personal and dont wanna get blamed for lettin it happen but here it goes.
    wen i was 17 i was sexually abused and raped by ma step dad and it went 2 court and i cant move on i've had councillin and everythin and feel suicidal ova it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Give the guy a break.

    Edited to say: :confused: Sorry, I didn't even look to see if this was a guy or not :blush:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if nobody knows who you are, then just post the problem in the relevent section, get it off your chest, and you will get a better response
    Loads of people write about really personal things, your not the only one with personal problems
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i no people got probs but its done my head in totally and cant get ova it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    i no people got probs but its done my head in totally and cant get ova it

    Don't use text talk, ie. know = no, over = ova. It pisses people off and you're not likely to get any replies. Just some friendly advice.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sounds like your pissed off not bein friendly
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Right, over and above the use of text talk, I think we could maybe go about offering this girl advice, rather than pulling them up over thesite.org etiquette? First off, you aren't to blame for what happened, and noone here is going to think that. It's happened, but don't blame yourself. If it went to court, was your stepdad charged? You've made a step in the right direction by having councilling, but these things take time before they start to benefit you. Is there anyone else in your life you can talk to? A boyfriend, family member, someone you trust? I don't have any personal experience of this, and can't begin to imagine how awful it must be feeling like this, but don't blame yourself, no matter what you think, it wasn't your fault.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    its kinda personal and dont wanna get blamed for lettin it happen but here it goes.
    wen i was 17 i was sexually abused and raped by ma step dad and it went 2 court and i cant move on i've had councillin and everythin and feel suicidal ova it

    you just have to realise that none of this is your fault!
    i know that this is a lot harder said than done but its what you have to do.
    Your step dad is just an evil piece of shit and will rot in hell, remember that.
    Try not to dwell on the past, i can understand that this will (obviously) be very hard to do. try and avoid things that will remind you of what happened, avoid the place it happened especially! clear out any reminders you have of of your step dad and ask supportive family members/friends not to mention him. just completely block him out of your mind if you can, just pretend he has never existed.
    hope this has helped. and please dont throw away your life for what this scum has done. dont let him win!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think what makes this slightly worse is I believe this is a guy (Check out the faceparty).

    Erm. As KoG has already said. You can't blame yourself for what happened. Did the court find him guilty? If not then do you need some kinda closure.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    glasgow king i aint no girl ok am male ok
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't use txt spk, and you'd be better asking in the relationships or health forums.

    Look on the RAINN website for starters, as it is a community for the victims of rape and incest. You should find plenty of help and advice there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    glasgow king i aint no girl ok am male ok
    Sorry, my bad. I had originally put girl/guy on my reply first, but then changed it before I posted it. Silly notion that you were a female.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    everybody thinks just females get raped but males get raped also
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You mentioned that you're feeling suicidal and I suggest that if you are you visit here It has the Samaritans helpline on it and I strongly advise you to ring them if you're feeling this desperate.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i thought u wudnt put nothin up about what i told u but i guess i cant trust you after all so bye the lot of you
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    its kinda personal and dont wanna get blamed for lettin it happen but here it goes.
    wen i was 17 i was sexually abused and raped by ma step dad and it went 2 court and i cant move on i've had councillin and everythin and feel suicidal ova it

    :confused: You said here that you feel suicidal mate.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ya a lil bit but i dint need u puttin it up as well
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    everybody thinks just females get raped but males get raped also

    I know, it was just that you read like a female (sorry!). I know that's daft, but that was what you sounded like. Anyway, regardless of whether you're male or female, rape is rape, no matter how you look at it, and it is still just as traumatic. You've been given some decent advice, some of which you should definitely go with, like phoning the Samaritans. Sucidical feelings a sign of desperation, and there's only so much people can do on a message board.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    ya a lil bit but i dint need u puttin it up as well

    You already mentioned feeling suicidal so everyone who read the thread knew anyway.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    ya a lil bit but i dint need u puttin it up as well
    Why not? Does it make you more suicidal if you see it typed by someone else too? :confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If this is a fucking troll!!!! Honestly, this is what pisses people off!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    ya a lil bit but i dint need u puttin it up as well

    What?

    Either take the responses with some politeness or push off. We've taken the time to answer your question with some sources of further information, at least you could have the respect to take those answers without being abusive and ungrateful.

    If it isn't what you wanted then actually tell us something to work on.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by thomson2004
    i thought u wudnt put nothin up about what i told u but i guess i cant trust you after all so bye the lot of you

    you're the one who put it up mate, this is a public message board if you dont want everyone to read what you write then i'd suggest not posting. people have given some useful links in this thread already and i would recomend visiting those. if you really want no-one else reading these messages then i would delete your original post and post a new one asking for people to reply if they dont mind giving support through private messages.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by TheKingOfGlasgow
    If this is a fucking troll!!!! Honestly, this is what pisses people off!

    People who lie about this should get given ebola.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi there
    I'm not sure what your last post is referring to - which is maybe why we try to get people not to use text speak as it's easy to misinterpret, but it seems like you are upset at the responses you are getting. It's hard for an online community to offer any help unless they know a little about your situation, so well done for being brave and telling us what's troubling you. It sounds like you've been through a rough time and you may well find that coming here and talking openly will help you, but it helps if you listen to the advice you are given.

    I can understand why you found counselling hard - it digs up all the stuff you'd rather bury, but it;s worth it in the end if you can persevere. Something like this can't be shoved under the carpet.
    Like the others said, is there anyone you can turn to about this? If you can confide in a family member they will be able to support you through your counselling and help you when you're feeling low.

    You've been given some good links already, but you should also check out http://rasac.org.uk/ - they offer emotional help and support. It may be that you were just with the wrong counsellor, or that they weren't trained enough to deal with these issues, in which case talking to someone else may help.

    We do have some articles here on TheSite that can also help you:

    Surviving sexual assault

    Sexual offences explained

    Please stick around - this place could really help you if you let it.

    Take care

    Hannah Spanner x
    PS - I'm moving this to the sex boards
  • littlemissylittlemissy Posts: 9,972 Supreme Poster
    Originally posted by Kermit
    Either take the responses with some politeness or push off. We've taken the time to answer your question with some sources of further information, at least you could have the respect to take those answers without being abusive and ungrateful.

    exactly how was he being abusive? :confused:
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