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Long weekend...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey guys and girls <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> My girlfriend and I have been going out for about 6months - I say going out but its a long distance relationship with us at opposite ends of the country.

Anyhow things are starting to look up for the pair of us as we are looking to go to uni together. As part of this 'master plan' we are going to look around the uni and have a look at renting a flat for a couple of months time.

While we are staying there we have agreed to share a double room because we both feel comfy in one another company and as we are students, its cheap lol.

Anyhow, recently she's been very flirty with me,im not expecting anything while we are up there because neither are after sex from the other and we are both virgins but, my problem is this: if i take protection will she think that I am assuming and that I only see our relationship in physical terms?
or,
Do i look like an idiot for not thinking ahead or being naieve? I would never imagine having unprotected sex as neither of us is anywhere near ready.
Any advice or reassurance would be welcome <IMG SRC="confused.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

ps: i thought this was better suited to relationships rather than sex topic area due to the nature of it <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

[ 27-04-2002: Message edited by: South ]

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hello.
    I think you should discuss sex with her if you can. The next time you are together, ask her where she see's the relationship heading and if she is expecting anything more. I know this is easier said than done but it may help to know how she is feeling at this time and hopefully she will appreciate you being open with her instead of hiding your worries from her.
    Love Kaz x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Take the contraception and if you do decide to have sex and she asks any questions say you always carry protection to be on the safe side.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would take them, its better to be safe than sorry. I remember when I went away for the w/end for the first time with my ex, he took condoms with him (although we did end up having sex) & he thought the same as u thought, that I would be really pissed off & think he was just after sex but I didn't at all. Chances are she won't either & if she does just say u brought them only INCASE u did have sex not because u KNEW u were going to & just tell her u wanted to be safe just incase.

    Good luck <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Definitely take protection. But preferably think you should talk to her about it beforehand anyway, she'll be able to tell you more than we can <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> If you can't talk to her then take protection anyway.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As the others have said, definately take the condoms and TALK to her about it.

    I was in a similar situation, in that although me and my bf regularly spent nights together (in same bed etc.) we didn't have sex until about eight months after, probably mostly because of this lack of communication. The thing was, early into the relationship we nearly had sex, but when he found out I too was a virgin, he stopped and muttered about wanting it to be perfect for us. But then he didn't mention it again, and I was worried about bringing it up first, in case he got offended or something. Being the responsible Boots girl that I am, I had a packet of condoms hidden away in my drawer for a couple of months, waiting for *him* to make the first move, but he just didn't and in the end I had to do the "shall we.." line - which was effective <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    But it would have been a hell of a lot easier if we had been able to talk about it properly, instead of leaving it until we were in bed, doing stuff and not knowing what the other was thinking.

    Good luck, dude.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Always carry at least one condom mate, virgin or not! <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    I can promise you the one day you do not have any protection you'll have oppotunities of sex, possibly more than one, sods law..*hates it*...grrr!

    Now I always keep one and if girls think I'm assuming too much then tough, I'd rather assume too much and not getting any kids/diseases :P

    Good luck mate,

    Phil.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i reckon you take protection, i mean c'mon she could be hoping u will!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey thanks for all your good advice (its what this site is all about) <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> We are quite open with one another so talking to her about it shouldn't be a problem, we have before just not so specificaly. Might take some condoms just incase...

    Totaly agree with sods law lol!!!

    <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ok, ok so i havent even KISSED a girl yet, but that dont mean i aint got my krew to ask for advice <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    we all reckon (democracy of the krew) that even though your packin a few condoms, ya dont have to scream about it do ya? stash a few in ya wallet or whatever, secretly of course, and if and when the opportunity arises just use em.

    hope that makes sense bruv

    ~dappa

    [ 30-04-2002: Message edited by: dappa_don ]
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    talk about it with her first.
    if you don't feel comfortable doing this then don't take any. i mean, i'm sure theres somewhere nearby that you can get some from. either way your still going to be using contraception so it isn't as if you aren't thinking about her feelings
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well i talked to her about it a couple of days ago now. We have agreed that we will have sex on 'the' weekend, of course neither of us feel pressured and understand nothing has to happen between us as the weekend will be special enough just spending time with one another. However I feel a slight pressure to perform as such now, I want sex for all the right reasons, i think I just worry too much <IMG SRC="rolleyes.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> Anyway ideas or ways to calm your nerves prior or during the act?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't be nervous, it is your first time and neither of you should expect it to be the best. Try and relax and concentrate on the task.....

    Try not to feel pressurised to be a love god, you will get better with practise <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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