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should i stay or should i go ?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
In a nutshell I am engaged to an aussie lass who went back to Australia 2 months ago.
I have resigned from work, we have applied for partner migration and are due to marry next year. I am due to head to Australia in 2 weeks and suddenly she has started having lots of doubts.

She says that the time we spent together in the UK seems like a fantasy and that now she is back home reality has struck her and she doesn't know if i will fit into her new life.

She says that her heart tells her that everything will be ok when i'm there but her head tells her otherwise. Apparently she says she feels numb when she thinks about us ??


We have talked and talked and she knows she is being unreasonable and selfish but says she can't help the way she feels.

Very very confused - any thoughts ?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you going for a holiday or permanently?
    Perhaps it would be worth going if you are just going for a while but if you've given up work, sold the cat and put the furniture in storage perhaps you should make sure she really wants to go ahead with it before you cut all ties with your former life?

    It's very unfair of her to suddenly throw all this at you. Perhaps it will be OK but it sounds like you have made all the sacrifices and now she'd getting cold feet.

    What about asking her to make a sacrifice and come over to see you for a month..then she might give you an answer that tells you all you need to know about her commitment.

    good luck.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes this does sound very confusing. However it's probably just her 'cold feet' talking, and everything will be okay when you finally get out there.

    However, you really have to talk to her. I mean she's obviously worried about things, and needs to have a heart-to-heart with you. It's not fair on you, but if she decides that she can't do this, it's better to know now than later!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Go, definately go! At least I will get away from UK... (I'm leaving UK forever this summer).

    Now that she's back home, everythings seems normal again, she's probably just wondering/worrying if all she had with you was too good to be true. You'll just have to go over there and remind her of the good time that you two had together, and show her that it's more than just a fantasy.

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