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Do i tell him?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
theres this lad i have liked for over a year but i had never actually spoken to him until about a month ago cos he had a girlfriend but now theyve split up.

since then we have got quite close and kiss etc, but he also does this with other girls cos he says hes not ready for a relationship yet as he still loves his ex, so hes just having a bit of fun and making the most of what he missed out on when he had a girlfriend (he was going out with her for 14 months)

thing is, he said that i am more special than all of the other girls cos im really sweet etc and not just after sex, which the other girls are. he said that hes still not ready for a relationship but if he was he'd go out with me.

the other night we went clubbing and i stayed at his and we ended up nearly sleeping with eachother but stopped cos it was my first time and i was hurting alot and bleeding and he'd never slept with a virgin so this was new to him and said he didnt like seeing me in so much pain cos i mean so much to him. since then he has been acting abit differently and i was wondering if this is because he thought that i was different to the other girls, not just interested in sex, but now he might think that i am just interested in sex.

the thing is, the reason i wanted to sleep with him is because i think i love him but he doesnt know this so he thinks that im just like the others, sleeping with anyone even though were not even going out.

should i tell him i love him so that he doesnt think that i would just sleep with anyone and realsies why i wanted to sleep with him, or will this scare him off even more?

i just dont want him thinking that i go round sleeping with anyone, i want him to realise how much he means to me but dont know if thats a good idea if hes still getting over his ex? will he think that i am strange for loving him even though were not even going out and i know he's not ready for a relationship? what should i do please help, i really dont know if i should express my strong feelings for him ir not?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm not an expert but i dont think you should tell him, 14 months is quite along time and it will take a while for him to get over him, if he does care about you he will wait until your ready, and if u do find yourself rushing into this you might find he has spun you these lines just to get sex out of you. Wait a while talk to him and progress the relationship from there. Trust me hold on to your virginity for aslong as you can its not just virginity its dignity aswell. Build up your relationship first and give him chance to come out of his rebound session. It took me 4 months to get over a 8 month relationship. Just coz he is kissing over girls doesnt mean he is over his ex
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Rach you know what I think. You have done many things and as far as your conserned you have lost you Virginity already. You and this guy are really close and you clearly love him. Either way you can see yourself losing him he is not talking now. can you ruin it anymore by telling him the simple truth that you have feelings for him and you are not a slut. <IMG SRC="biggrin.gif" border="0" ALT="icon"> (i should know) comeone rach you have loved him for a year and been so obsessed with the dudes go for it babe! <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My opinion for you at the moment would be not to even consider sleeping with him as he has already said that he hasn't got over his ex, so he may just be using you (he may not be though). I wouldn't tell him that I loved him just yet, just let him know that you like him and as soon as he is ready for a relationship you would like it to be with you and see how it goes from there.

    Good Luck!

    xxxx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by becky_boop:
    <STRONG>My opinion for you at the moment would be not to even consider sleeping with him as he has already said that he hasn't got over his ex, so he may just be using you (he may not be though). I wouldn't tell him that I loved him just yet, just let him know that you like him and as soon as he is ready for a relationship you would like it to be with you and see how it goes from there.

    Good Luck!

    xxxx</STRONG>

    She already has slept with him. what she is asking advice on is whether after this should she tell him that she did not do it as she is a slut but because she has feelings for him. Either way its ruined.

    Rach where are you anyway?
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