I fancy my best m8

Former Member

OK here goes, its a long story but hey.
About 3 years I got to know this girl really well, lets call her "lila" and becuase of our personalities we became really good friends.
Then a year after that I fell out with another one of my good mates for something i cant even remeber (it was so childish and so my fault). I ended up growing apart from lila, it wasnt so much a qucik thing but gradual.
Then a year ago we went on a trip abroad with school and we became really good mates again because I gave her advice on some other lad she was seeing at the time.
Now when we returned home and from then on (about 6 months) i talk to her every day on MSN, see her in school obviously and we sometimes go out in a group and she comes along.
Now for the complicated part , up until about 4 months ago I only ever saw this girl as a friend but then because of my nature I ended up started to like her in an attractive way.
Now she doesn't know this and we are still really good mates.
When we go out I always sit with her and we hold hands etc and my other mates (male of course lol) tell me either that she must like me or that I should ask her. Now in my heart I dont think she likes me becasue shes one of these girls that lets every1 know who she likes and she always tells me on MSN wen shes having lad troubles and asks me for advice.
I know I should tell her but I really value our friendship and don't want to loose that if she says no. I have told only a select few of my m8s all of this and they all can be trusted, now if this girl actaully (i dont fink so) does like me then I think she would have told her mates and wudnt tell me about all the other lads she likes. Or I am totally wrong in thinking that.
Thanks for reading this, as my name says help is needed.
Any advice would be helpful

THANKS

Former Member

Hey, it might be worth your while to do a search because there are a couple of similar threads with lots of good advice.

I'm afraid the only way your going to find out is to talk to her. I understand that your worried about it affecting your friendship but it's probably too late. Your looking at her in a different light. If you don't tell her you might start resenting her. What happens if she gets a boyfriend? Could you stand to be around them?

I'm no expert so have a search for better responses to this.

Good luck.

Former Member

well, in all fairness, you never know until you ask really, and surely if your friendship is that close, it won't matter too much whether you tell her or not, she'll probably still see you as a friend, possibly even a closer one...
does she tend to name guys when she discusses her problems with you, or does she cryptically avoid naming them? that, i find, can often be a telltale sign of hidden attraction to you
with regards to her telling you about all these other guys, it's possible she might be trying to make you realise that if you don't snap her up, someone else will
remember, you always go through life regretting the things you DIDN'T do...
good luck

Former Member

Hey laddy

Firstly... *HUGZ*

Life can be an awkward bitch when it wants to be.
As for your situation, looks like you've got two options.

First one, is to continue having your friendship her and not let on about your feelings, living and dreaming that maybe one day she'll confront you first.

OR, You could confront her, explaining that you've developed some feelings for her recently and ask if the feeling is mutal. To make things less awkward, try not to make your feelings sound too heavy on her so she doesn't feel pressure in thinking she has to feel the same way. Just ask her, if the feeling is mutal, if she ends up saying yes... 'GREAT' You take her out and see what happens from there... though if it ends up she values your friendship too much to think of you anymore. Then reassure her in saying that you don't want this conversation to jeopardize your friendship with her and hope you both can put this to the side. Hug her, smile and say you'll always be there for her as a 'Friend'.

Though if you don't get the answer you were wishing for, don't let that disheartened. Unfortunately, we can't get everything we want. Your young, so plenty of time to move on and meet a girl you deserve.

Good Luck Hun ~ Xxx

Former Member

Ok thanks for that. Yes I know its true to only regret the things you DIDNT do but ill still find it hard to tell her. Ill end up telling her after my Exams, weve left school for good then and itll be a more relaxed atmosphere even if she says no.
She does name the lads she likes yer but I still dont undertsnad how this is sposed to make me see that she likes me

Former Member

Originally posted by Cruel2BKind
Hey laddy

Firstly... *HUGZ*

Life can be an awkward bitch when it wants to be.
As for your situation, looks like you've got two options.

First one, is to continue having your friendship her and not let on about your feelings, living and dreaming that maybe one day she'll confront you first.

OR, You could confront her, explaining that you've developed some feelings for her recently and ask if the feeling is mutal. To make things less awkward, try not to make your feelings sound too heavy on her so she doesn't feel pressure in thinking she has to feel the same way. Just ask her, if the feeling is mutal, if she ends up saying yes... 'GREAT' You take her out and see what happens from there... though if it ends up she values your friendship too much to think of you anymore. Then reassure her in saying that you don't want this conversation to jeopardize your friendship with her and hope you both can put this to the side. Hug her, smile and say you'll always be there for her as a 'Friend'.

Though if you don't get the answer you were wishing for, don't let that disheartened. Unfortunately, we can't get everything we want. Your young, so plenty of time to move on and meet a girl you deserve.

Good Luck Hun ~ Xxx

The best advice anyone has ever given me . Your the one who deserves a hug, not me lol. Like i just said after my GCSE's Im gonna tell her just in the way you have described.
Thanks alot

Former Member

Originally posted by helpneeded
The best advice anyone has ever given me . Your the one who deserves a hug, not me lol. Like i just said after my GCSE's Im gonna tell her just in the way you have described.
Thanks alot

No Problem Hun ---

Best of Luck
**HUGZ**

Former Member

Originally posted by helpneeded
Ok thanks for that. Yes I know its true to only regret the things you DIDNT do but ill still find it hard to tell her. Ill end up telling her after my Exams, weve left school for good then and itll be a more relaxed atmosphere even if she says no.
She does name the lads she likes yer but I still dont undertsnad how this is sposed to make me see that she likes me

It could be that she's trying to get a response from you to gauge your feelings. If it helps I had a similar situation at high school and regret not asking.

Just go for it man!:thumb:
(I'm assuming you're a bloke!)

Former Member

Yer Im a bloke lol. Im gonna talk it over with my male best mate tonight and see what he thinks, and to think I found thesite.org by accident
Thanks again ppl its much appreciated

Former Member

It's a tough situation to be in, i liked my best mate recently.

This may help you