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i'm back on the smack ...jack
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
no need to be coy ...roy.
spent the day in manchester yesterday ...to discover an old freind is back on the smack.
a very talented metal fabricator ...talented enough to have always had his own little one man show. always worked for himself at his prices ...after twenty years clean ...he has now lost everything. after twenty years clean ...the needle takes another man.
very sad.
what can i do about it? absolutely nothing.
very sad.
spent the day in manchester yesterday ...to discover an old freind is back on the smack.
a very talented metal fabricator ...talented enough to have always had his own little one man show. always worked for himself at his prices ...after twenty years clean ...he has now lost everything. after twenty years clean ...the needle takes another man.
very sad.
what can i do about it? absolutely nothing.
very sad.
0
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i didn't go to visit him ...didn't speak to him.
i don't go into builings where there are heroin users. not even if there on fire.
i have a lot of history with this man ...since kids. 35years.
pulled some great stunts together ...both have a child to the same woman.
he seemed to loose the plot when life was treating him with hope and favour.
if he can't handle it when it's going well ...how the fuck at 53 will he handle the rigours of being a junkie?
he's gonna die.
he was a very complicated character ...his downfall being how simplisticaly he lookd at life ...yhe's always been a little naive.
he has a lot of old pains and wounds that he he has carried and largely failed to deal with ...that's always been an obvious.
i was expecting him to turn into a drunk but ...a junkie.
In some ways it is an easy answer to use any drug like that, you know what you are going to get with it, its very simple.
I guess if he's going through some nasty stuff its going to be at the back of his mind "well some junk would soothe these problems". Once you have used a drug in that way its impossible to forget how easy in the short term it is to get rid of your problems.
The point obviously is though that the simple answer comes at a cost.
i'm going to do absolutely nothing. i am going to let whatever happens happen and then ...and only then ...will i possibly be of any use to him. yes of course ...i pray that i will be the one he will come to ...but he knows not to the way things are. he knows he doesn't want to right now. he can't.
the physical realities of him being a hundred mile round trip away are miniscule when compared with the difficulties of my personal resolve. my survival.
my foundations of confidence and strength ...never again ...have been severely shaken. i have to remove myself from heroin and it's people totaly ...that's what i have done for years ...and prospered. if i do it any different i threaten my entire families wealth and happiness. they come first. in fact when it comes to avoiding heroin ...i come first.
that way ...theres always one of us left to pick up the fallen.
Is it anger or fright?
A friend of mine, 6 months ago was a very successful business man. Now he's a down and out junkie with no up and coming business, no fancy cars and he's stealing from his own parents. It all happend so quick, if I had to pick out of anyone I know, who that would happen to, he would be my last choice.
How'd he get started?
now i've had time to reflect ...i feel stronger than ever.
...and thankyou for your good wishes.
Sorry on the late reply, I'm not round much anymore!
Give it time, you'll know what the right thing to do is in the end!
i have a couple of people keeping an ear to the ground for me ...just hope i don't get an email inviting me to a funereal.