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OK i've done something really stupid

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
While out at the weekend with my mate, i met this guy. We got chatting and i found out we have tons in common. Anyway he gave me his number and then i left.

All well and good, i hear you cry but the problem is that i'm in a relationship already. Have been with my bf for 2 yrs, but lately we seem to have lost the spark. Feel like we're stuck in a rut. No excuse i know.

Anyway after a really bad argument with my man, i called the guy i had met in the bar. We got talking again, and met up the next day for a drink. It was the same as the night before, we really hit it off.

We ended up kissing, before i pulled away and said i had to go, before things got too serious. He still doesn't know that i have a boyfriend, and i know it's not fair on either of them.

I really hate myself right now, but could really use some wise words, before i go insane. Me and my bf used to be good together, but now it's gone stale, and i've met this other guy i just don't know what to do. HELP!!!!!


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    first and foremost u need to make your mind up weather u and ya fella have a future, and until you do then you should leave others well alone. Sounds like perhaps you've had enough of commitment which is fair enough, in which case let your fella down gently, it won't hurt him as much as cheating on him ! once and if your a free agent u go wild and do as you please thats what its all about ! but don't leave a hurt and cheated lad behind you it just ain't fair !
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Like Ebenzer said, you have to decide whther this "exciting" fling of yours is worth it, compared to what you have with your bf. 2 years is a long time, and it would be shame to jeopardise that for the sake of something new. All relationships sink into a routine, so you have several choices,
    1.You can go out with this new bloke, but what happens when the spark wears off?
    2.You can cheat on your bloke, but run the risk of destroying him
    3.You can try to make your relationship work as best you can, looking for new blokes means you aren't putting enough effort into keeping it alive.

    You only get out of it what you put in.

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i see your point. the thing is that i don't actually think i am in love with my bf anymore. i still care for him, but the chemistry isn't there anymore.

    would never want to hurt him, know he would be crushed completely if he found out. but when i try and break it off with him, he just gets really angry and upset, and threatens to do something stupid. don't know how i can let him down gently.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I gotta admit I was like that with my ex, didnt want to lose her so I made silly threats about what I would do to myself if she left. She saw through it, and I kinda felt pathetic afterwards.

    Anyway I think ure experience with ure other guy was the catalyst you need to make that change, and get out of your relationship. You have to tell him, and the sooner the better.

    Good luck

    Winners never quit and quitters never win !!
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