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Moral dilemma
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Heres an interesting one...what do you do when...
A very elderly and sometimes confused old man is being cared for in a residential home by a team of care workers. He's taken a particular shine to one young male carer whom he prefers to help him bathe, go to the toilet etc.
One day he need to go to the toilet only the Care worker he likes is busy with another resident and so he askes one of the other full time carers to take the man to the toilet.
However, the old man is particularly put out. He's upset because the man taking him to the toilet is black and the old man has all through his life disliked and looked down upon black people.
So .... what is fair or moraly correct? Should the care team respect the old mans wishes and tell the Black care worker he can't attend to the man as it offends him or should the care team disregard the old mans feelings because they don't want to make distinctions according to race?
A very elderly and sometimes confused old man is being cared for in a residential home by a team of care workers. He's taken a particular shine to one young male carer whom he prefers to help him bathe, go to the toilet etc.
One day he need to go to the toilet only the Care worker he likes is busy with another resident and so he askes one of the other full time carers to take the man to the toilet.
However, the old man is particularly put out. He's upset because the man taking him to the toilet is black and the old man has all through his life disliked and looked down upon black people.
So .... what is fair or moraly correct? Should the care team respect the old mans wishes and tell the Black care worker he can't attend to the man as it offends him or should the care team disregard the old mans feelings because they don't want to make distinctions according to race?
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Ergo, if he feels comfortable with a white nurse then so be it!
Old people can be very stand offish, they dont like change but if handled properly they can adapt.........they are just like kids really. Once they get to know someone they are fine, but its got to be a gradual thing.
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It's tricky because you can't stop the black nurse doing his job, regardless of whom he's treating. I don't think the man has the right to discriminate but then again the clinic are obliged to give him the care he wants as well as the care he needs. Hmmm, I'll have to think about this a bit more...
You can't take an old bloke, who for most of his life has disliked black people for whatever reason and put him in a situation where a black person who he doesn't know is taking him to the toilet and washing his nuts for him.
It doesn't matter why this person doesn't like black people, as long as he is quiet about it and not rude about it he can make his feelings known. Most black people I know are very understanding of the older generation, especially the 80 year olds who spent most of their life in what was, a very racist time. people have to remember that it's only really the last 20 years that black people have become truly accepted in mainstream society. It'll take longer than 20 years to change someones own beliefs that they've had since they were born.
byny didnt say he was racist, she said he had disliked black people and kind of looked down at them. Slightly different ? Would it not be better to educate him?
yes i know he is old but old people are just like kids, so if the white care worker that he likes, gets on with the black care worker, then the old man could then start to like the black care worker ?
Just a thought like
I dont think they should give up on people because of age, we are never too old to learn so educate the old people, they in turn talk to younger relatives and hey presto the younger members of his family (who may well be like the old man and not like black people) could just change their opinion also.
this guy is from another time ...another world. a world of english empire attitudes ...brittania rule the waves etc ...for king and country etc ...his brain and soul will have been hammered from an early age with this kind of stuff. them darkies etc ...
not bnp material.
hopefuly the black guy will see the funny side of it and hopefuly with time the guy can be educated a little ...
but it is a tricky one.
My mum used to work in a care home, and I can remember this problem arising when one of the residents refused to acknowledge one of the carers because she was of a lower caste to her. It was very difficult for all, and the old woman made herself extremely unpopular in the process, but the home decided that the best option would be to use other carers for her. I can't help but feel a great deal of respect for the patience and the tolerance of the lower caste carer, who must have found the situation very difficult.
Katie x
Well, I think they should get a white nurse for him if one is available. After all, it's probably his family, pension or money that's paying for his home and technically I guess that means he's entitled to be helped by some people and not by others because he's contributing to their wages.
As for the racism. Well everybody has an opinion on things and prejudices, if he doesn't like black people then there's no need to piss him off by giving him a black nurse, or piss the nurse off by making him wipe the arse of a 'racist'.
Scuse me where does racism come into it ? byny said he didnt like black people, racism and not liking black people are two totally different things !!!!
again i say educate the old man, people are never too old to learn. Let this old man get to forget about the colour and see the care worked in a different light
Uhhhh....
Sounds like 'racism' to me, certainly racial prejudice.
rac·ism
n.
1. The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others.
2. Discrimination or prejudice based on race.
If you look down on somebody it means you are above them, to be 'above' somebody means heirarchy. To believe that skin colour predetermines where they appear in the heirarchy by dictionary terms makes him racist.
I can't believe it!
"He's not racist! He just doesn't like blacks."
Ha ha haa
he may be a racist, but he is totally different to the sort of racist who joins the ku klux clan or BNP.
I hear many people say with no doubt that blacks a better at basketball, they can sing better...
That "latinos" are great dancers...
That English are on time...
Italians are romantic...
Spanish are laid back...
French are smelly...
I never said the old man was evil. The man in KKK isn´t evil either. They have just been brought up in a different enviroment.
(There is some confusion with races or etnias in this post... that is because the idea of those divisions is stupid...)
What is BNP?
Why not?
To get on in the world you have to be able to make allowances for people at EVERY social level. You will meet people you don't agree with, or people you dont like for whatever reason. I work with a bloke who is one of the laziest people I have ever met, but in order to get on with my work I have to make allowances for him, in order that we look professional and do our job properly.
I also have to accept that i will meet people who are sezist, people who don't like asians, or asylum seekers. i may agree with them, i may not, but at all times i have to remain professional.
The black nurse in the nursing home will no doubt do the same thing.
To put it bluntly, stuff the old bugger. If it's a home they should try to evict him, if he wants to play supremecist.
We'd do it.
Isn't anyone telling me?
A bunch of far-right, viciously racist, fascist, neo-nazi, Holocaust-denying, xenophobic, homophobic sub-human scumbags masquerading as a political party.
Edited to add: Ladyjade beat me to it.