Am I using him??? I don't know wot 2 do!

Former Member

I recently split up with my bf 'n I was feeling really down. Then this boy from my school was being really nice 2 me and was trying to cheer me up- we became quite close but a couple of days ago when we were just chatting he kissed me!!
At first I was mad at him because I didn't need any more complications in my life but now I've realised that I really like him but I'm scared that if I go out with him everyone will think that I'm only using him to get back at my ex.
What should I do??

london_brunette
xxx

Former Member

Hi,
Sorry to hear about your grief.

I suppose this is one of those issues where you need to balance things out, and consider different ways of looking at it.

OPTION 1
Who knows, you might be on the rebound, and go out with this guy for a few weeks, realise you don't really like him - finish and everyone understand you are on the rebound, and says nothing.

Your friend realises you may be on the rebound, so he knows the score. However I would ask you the question is he taking advantage of you when you are in an emotionally vulnerable state?

OPTION 2
If you think he isn't taking a liberty, and you really like him, - if he has been a rock of support for you, and you feel mutually attracted to each other - then why shouldn't you go for it. If people think it's to get back at your ex, you know the truth, real friends would listen to your side, and not pre-judge you.

HOWEVER
Unfortunately no-one can wave a magic wand and sort everything out for you, you have to decide what is best for you.

take care
derby

Former Member

Thanx a lot for the advise. I think it's helped me sort things out but I'm still not sure what 2 do. My friends also said that he was only taking advantage of me cos I've been so messed up lately but he's been really kind 2 me.

The only reason why I can't make up my mind is because I've just ended a relationship which went really bad and I just can't risk going through that again!!
But I have to say that whatever I do decide- I couldn't care less what everyone else thinks because I've made up with me ex and we've decided 2 b mates even though every1 thinks we hate each other!!

thanx neway for the advise
london_brunette
xxx

Former Member

A useful and general rule-of-thumb is that guys generally put their dicks first. They may not know it or believe it, but it's well and truely programmed in the DNA that procreation comes before compassion.

I have conducted an extensive one man survey and this was my survey result

I'm ganna put this point out for general discussion