Rejection

Former Member

I'm not meaning this to sound up myself in ANY way, but I've just realised that I've never really been rejected by a guy before. (until last night, that is) I mean, I have, but that was a guy who had a girlfriend. It's not that I think I'm wonderful and that no guy could resist me, it's just that I don't have much experience and the experience I do have is where I fancy a guy and he fancies me back at least a little, so something happens.

But last night I was rejected (not in so many words but I had it made very obvious that he wasn't interested) by a guy who is single and available and who I fancied the pants off. Absolutely nothing is going to happen with him. And that's not because he has a girlfriend or any other excuse but just simply because he's not interested in me. And I can't help but take that personally and think 'what's wrong with me'?

I guess I just wanted to ask what do you do to get over it? And yes I know it sounds stupid and it happens to everyone all the time but there we go, I've only been single for a month and before that I was in a year and a half relationship with a guy who'd fancied me for ages. At the moment I'm thinking get drunk and start thinking about all the things about this guy which were actually really annoying. And I've found a few already, so yay me.

I'm aware of how stupid this sounds, by the way.

Former Member

There isnt anything wrong with you at all. Some people just dont "do it" for others. That doesnt mean he doesnt think youre pretty or whatever, but maybe the spark wasnt there. Or maybe its not that he isnt interested in YOU, he might not be interested in anyone just now. If that makes sense :nervous:

Former Member

I rationalise. Thinking I'm not good enough gets me down so I think of all the other possible reasons :yes: seems to work. Sometimes. Except when there is 'no' reason other than they just don't like you hurtsssss.

Hmmm :chin: a new strategy perhaps?

Former Member

Homosexual?

Just Come Out Of Long Term Bad Relationship?

Monk In Disguise?

Former Member

LSS, you're lucky. You're very good looking, and will rarely have to go through the feelings of rejection that most people go through. Of course, it doesn't matter how good looking you are, you still stand a chance of rejection. It's just that you'll have a much lower chance. At least you can begin to appreciate what most people go through, and why it's such a big fear and issue among posters on here.

Mr_Wobble

Former Member

If this is the only time you've been rejected, then you're lucky, ok imagine that kind of thing happening over and over again, thats what its like for many people. I guess everyone should have some experience with rejection, otherwise they'll just be...arrogant.

Former Member

Welcome to the real world

Former Member

How to deal with it? OK, after last week's (which probably hit me more than any other time) i got pissed for a couple of nights, then went home, cooled off and got away from everything. Now i'm back and feeling fresh, but i don't know what will happen when i see her next.

I'm just thinking of the postivies, like being able to go on the pull again with my mates without anybody in the bakc of my mind. But after a few years of doing that anyway i'm getting a bit bored

And geez why does this always have to happen in the run-up to Valentine's Day???

Former Member

I just knew I was going to get some replies saying 'welcome to the real world' and 'count yourself lucky' and stuff. It's not because I'm good looking or because everyone fancies me or anything like that, it's just because I've been in a series of long term relationships so I've never really even pursued a guy before. And the first time I did, last week, I got rejected. I was actually asking for people to tell me how to deal with it, not give me bitter 'count yourself lucky' replies.

Anyway...

I feel better about it now. I've enjoyed being single a little more now and I don't care so much about this guy. Still care about him a bit but... no so much.

Former Member

BTW you have my total sympathies... hopefully my post didn't come across too brash! I'd say big-time rejection is one of the worst things that can happen to a young person emotionally (barring MAJOR stuff, obviously)

Former Member

Thanks Rocks, no I was looking more at the people who replied telling me that I should count myself lucky and all that *glares at them*

I'm feeling better about it now. He was younger than me, anyway... can't have that, can we?