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Mates and girls

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Situation: you've been good mates for about 9 years with someone and you have fancied them for most of this time. You used to pull each other all the time when you were drunk about 3 or 4 years ago, nothing has happened for years now but you still like them and although you haven't said anything recently they knows how you feel, but doesn't feel the same anymore.

Now they have got together with one of your bestmates, who has also known them for a few years. So they both know you like this person, but they've still done it. How do you feel? Would you be mad at either/both of them? Or would you just be happy for them and accept the fact that they like someone else?


(Basically I have got together with one of my best boymate's friends and feel a bit guilty as my mate isn't too pleased....)


edited: to make more sense :p

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Personally i would get really pissed off, but i would accept it too because its happened and theres nothing you can do.

    I feel sorry for you, hope you feel better soon.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by RudeBwoy
    I feel sorry for you, hope you feel better soon.

    Just want to point out that I am the girl in question, not a pissed off bloke, thought that would have been obvious :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well although I think there is a certain amount of sensitivty/consideration you have to show to someone who fancies you if you don't feel the same, you are in no way obliged to remain single or not get into relationships just because someone else likes you.

    The bloke who fancies you may be pissed off, but at the end of the day if you have made your feelings towards him clear and you don't rub it in his face that you're having a relationship with another mate, then you aren't doing anything wrong in my opinion. He'd probably be upset regardless of who you were with, and at some point he just has to come to terms with the fact you don't feel that way about him. So you're not a bitch :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I was the pissed off bloke then I'd be pissed off with myself rather than you. I've been there before. Its just one of those situations when you know you can't blame anyone else but yourself, hence why those situations can be so painful.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you're well within your rights tbh. The guy knows nothing is going to happen, and while he may be upset, there's no point treading on eggshells with him; what are you meant to do, remain a spinster for the rest of your life? It would be a bit like saying if he can't have you, no one can. I'm sure that if he's a good friend, he'll understand.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well after such a long amount of time not doing anything I think you have only yourself to blame, sorry to be blunt babes!
    Maybe they like each other too-
    Be happy for them and dont go losing good mates or doing anything stupid. Doubt this is what you wanted to hear but try face facts here!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i was that pissed off bloke once, ive seen this so many times,
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Docter Lurve
    Well after such a long amount of time not doing anything I think you have only yourself to blame, sorry to be blunt babes!
    Maybe they like each other too-
    Be happy for them and dont go losing good mates or doing anything stupid. Doubt this is what you wanted to hear but try face facts here!

    You don't read do you? :pI am the girl, my mate fancies me but I have got together with his mate....get it now? :p

    Thanks everyone that can read ;) I think I shall just get on with it and hope my mate will accept it and not stay too pissed off about it!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I must admit you had me confused for about 30 seconds there - I thought you were coming out of the closet, Faith! But now I actually understand the situation here are my musings...

    I don't reckon you've done anything wrong. You don't fancy the other guy and you haven't even done anything with him for years so he can't expect any sort of commitment to him. He'll be pissed off anyway, he can't help that, but he shouldn't give you a hard time about it as long as you're tactful and don't flaunt it in his face too much. Hope it goes well for you!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Faith
    You don't read do you? :pI am the girl, my mate fancies me but I have got together with his mate....get it now? :p

    Thanks everyone that can read ;) I think I shall just get on with it and hope my mate will accept it and not stay too pissed off about it!

    Ok- my bad!

    Well then same advice I originally said.
    Ye I think your right- one of you try say it to him so it doesnt muster up though. I think your perefectly right-

    And if worse comes to worse you could always have both :p
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