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I know everyones but has anyone got any tips?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey everyone, like i said its obvious everyones got there own problems but i was just wondering if anyone's in the same situation.

My girlfriend and i were madly in love then she went to india on a Gap year volunteer/travelling type thing. she dumped me about a 2months ago, for reasons i can totaly except,nothing i'd done but a need for independence. In september she starts at newcastle uni but im down south in Oxford(brookes not the clever one). I realise thatshe is right and staying to gether would lead to resentment but how do i stop loving her, she gets back from india in a week and is coming to visit. But i dont know weather to see her or not. im still completely in love with her and dont want to seem clingy when i know its right that we split up.
Does anyone have any ideas?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Séan:
    <STRONG>Hey everyone, like i said its obvious everyones got there own problems but i was just wondering if anyone's in the same situation.

    My girlfriend and i were madly in love then she went to india on a Gap year volunteer/travelling type thing. she dumped me about a 2months ago, for reasons i can totaly except,nothing i'd done but a need for independence. In september she starts at newcastle uni but im down south in Oxford(brookes not the clever one). I realise thatshe is right and staying to gether would lead to resentment but how do i stop loving her, she gets back from india in a week and is coming to visit. But i dont know weather to see her or not. im still completely in love with her and dont want to seem clingy when i know its right that we split up.
    Does anyone have any ideas?</STRONG>

    You obviously still love this girl, so what is the point in trying to cover it up when you see her. It will only be more obvious to her, if you're acting all weird, and avoiding her.

    If i was in your situation, i would play it by ear. Talk to her, and find out what she's feeling. Explain that you totally understood why you had to finish when you did, but ask her if things could be different now that she's home. Hell you never know, she could have been pining over you the whole time!!!

    Anyway, take a deep breath, and talk to her. Good luck, and let us know how you go.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't see her. If you want to stop loving her then you need to distance yourself from her.
    When she comes back just tell her you think it would be best if you didn't see her because it will only stir up old feelings.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you would probably want to think that you could stop loving someone overnight, but no, it doesn't work that way.

    it takes time.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanx for the replies guys but now ive got two conflicting messages and one thing i know to well. I know i still love her completely but, i honestly dont think it would be right for usto get back together she's just starting uni and other than me doesnt have much relationship experience, we want different things. I know it was her who called it off but i still want her to be a part of my life even if we cant or shouldnt be together. she gets back in a few days and is coming to visit soon. And i think when she comes i will meet her and tell her how i feel and hope it doesnt wreck any future friendship.
    Besides perhaps meeting her again is the only way ill get over her, shes probably changed a lot travelling does tend to do that to people.

    But thanx for the replies, and keep me posted for any quick shortcuts on getting over someone (except getting s/mashed which ive done to death)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If i were you i would see her. Theres nothign worse than making an enemy and i think shes wonder what was wrong if you didn't meet.
    Your unis are too far apart and i think you'd want to be single when youre at uni and not pinign for someone a million miles way. Hope that can sway you to see her. <IMG SRC="smile.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">

    As for gettign over someone, CRY!!! Ummmm Eat Chocolate and sleep... lol it's brill.

    private message me or e-mail if you want to chat..... Talking helps!!! <IMG SRC="wink.gif" border="0" ALT="icon">
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