Home Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

baby

Its really bugging me right now, i really want a baby. I know that i cant have one tho cos im not old enough, mature enough bla bla bla, but it dnt stop me wanting one. I had a scare a while ago where i was about a week late for my period and when i found out i wasnt up the duff i was quite upset.
I guess i just need a bit of advice really.:(
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: baby
    Originally posted by Zella
    Its really bugging me right now, i really want a baby. I know that i cant have one tho cos im not old enough, mature enough bla bla bla, but it dnt stop me wanting one. I had a scare a while ago where i was about a week late for my period and when i found out i wasnt up the duff i was quite upset.
    I guess i just need a bit of advice really.:(


    Awwww ill have one with you :naughty:

    you still up for sunday????? ill call you prob b4 then though.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Zella
    Although lots of women/girls make a really successful job of motherhood outside of the usual brackets (i.e stable relationship, financial security etc), there's a lot to be said until waiting at least until you are emotionally and mentally at the right point in life. That doesn't stop you getting broody when you see a real cute baby though - but try to turn that broodines into excitement of what the future holds.
    Check out some of our features in our family specialhere.
    :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    have you thought about doing something like volunteering at a nursery, or babysitting for relatives? that way you can brood to your hearts content at the babies, without having the (immense) responsibility of having your own.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thats the thing i baby sit all the time and it just makes me want one even more.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm the same and would love nothing more than a baby with my long-term girlfriend...but it's simply not the right time yet, whether I like it or not.

    Before we do have our first child (ideally) we'll be married and certainly living together, with at least one good income.

    Besides there are already too many pregnancies and not enough parents in the world.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    oh *huggles* for u hunni. i know the feeling, i miscarried when i was young (13) very very bad age! lost my little baby girl, Chloe at 17weeks, and then ive been pg twice since and miscarried both times, both accidents. Im v.young and know cant have one yet, but that longing feeling is still there and i cry about it and get upset and v.depressed its stupid really! but i know one day me and most other people will hopefully have a baby myb more than one.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you want a baby or a child. Do you want to be a parent?

    I too want children, never wanted them at a young age though...in fact never felt at ease with other peoples children and even now I'm a bit 'odd' around children but I feel I'm ready to have a child and all it entails. I'm under no illusions that its bloody hard work and that the hard work changes as the child gets older - so though no sleep, constant vigilance and massive frustrations may be a part of having a small baby, it doesn't get easier as they get older.

    I want to nurture a small person, give them boundaries, love, accept them when their personality forms, teach them, hopefully bring them up as good people, shield them from bad influence...but i also know all the 'good' parenting in the world can't block out influences from society, playmates etc etc.

    I don't know how old you are but I have personally waited until I know myself and I can provide. having said that my mum and dad had three kids really young with no money and they did ok.

    Do you have a father in mind? does he share your feelings on childrearing, or are you planning on doing it alone?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Those feelings will come & go until one day you will know its the right time for you. I can't explain, you just do.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by byny
    I want to nurture a small person, give them boundaries, love, accept them when their personality forms, teach them, hopefully bring them up as good people, shield them from bad influence...but i also know all the 'good' parenting in the world can't block out influences from society, playmates etc etc.

    Same here.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: baby
    Originally posted by Rude_boyz
    Awwww ill have one with you :naughty:

    you still up for sunday????? ill call you prob b4 then though.

    thats hardly helping is it? :mad:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it's perfectly normal to feel broody at times ... someone once told me that if a females tummy acts in a strange way they automatically think that they could be pregnant as thats the area where a baby would be
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Re: baby
    Originally posted by Char_Baby
    thats hardly helping is it? :mad:

    i thought the same...

    rude_boyz you're... not nearly mature enough to even think about it.. sorry. and joking about it sometimes isn't bad but sometimes like now a little sensitivity is needed. dont reply to this by the way.

    Hun, you just need to take it one day at a time, I know there's no way to just cure yourself of this longing - you may even have it all the way until you finally do have a baby! I'm sure it's completely natural; if a little inconvenient because you're young and not yet ready.

    I myself would one day like to be a father but I've never caught the 'baby bug' which seems to mostly afflict girls (but men too!) where they just think about having a baby all the time, and some have gone so far as to have unprotected one night stands in order to get pregnant!

    One day you will have a baby :) If you have it now it will change your life dramatically and things might not be comfortable. But maybe when you're about 30 (i know it might seem a long time :confused: not sure how old you are) and you're with the 'right' guy then it'll be natural and you'll bring up a beautiful family together and be able to buy lots of baby toys for the baby etc etc

    When you have a baby it's not like you miss out.. but your life does change. You will have less oppurtunity to go out with your friends, less oppurtunity certainly to 'be independant' and backpack across Europe. I don't know what it is with a lot of girls I know but they seem to think they are ready to settle down already and have 'had their fun' when they might only be 16 or 17!!!

    Try and take things easy, enjoy your life, do the things that you might have trouble doing when you have kids because I'm sure if you think about it, it will make you appreciate it more. I hope I've helped :) *hugs*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Re: Re: baby
    Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
    When you have a baby it's not like you miss out.. but your life does change.

    nice sentiment, shyboy, but i had to pick up on this.

    you DO miss out on some things when you have a baby. at least for a few years, you have created something which is entirely dependent on you. and you have a responsibilty to fulfil that. that means, in all likelihood, that you're going to miss out a hell of a lot. the only thing that changes as you get older is that you know what you're going to miss, and you'd still rather have the baby.

    you have a responsibility to that child, not just an emotional responsibility, but a financial responsibility too, and i doubt, at your age, you have the funds to properly support a child. i read somewhere that it costs at least £15,000 to raise a child.

    And yes i know there ARE mothers, and there are some on here, that have had children at a young age and are still very good mothers. doesn't make it the ideal situation.

    i know how you feel (and mr. kaffrin will freak out if he reads this) but there is nothing i would like more than to have a baby. there are women all over my family that are having children at the moment, and i am SO envious of them. but it's not the right time. we're too young, and too poor. our future babies deserve better than we can give them right now. so i'll wait.

    so basically what i'm saying, is if you can't wait for your sake, wait for your baby's sake.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    oh you poor thing, feeling broody can be such an overwhelming feeling. I remember feeling like that after I had my abortion when i was 17. I used to look through baby books and catalogues of baby stuff and just feel desperate. I didnt have one though, I got a pet instead, as some people are just nurturers by nature and need something to look after. I found my broody feelings subsided quite a lot after I got my pet (it was only a hamster, but I loved him) I ended up waiting till I was 24 to have my baby and im glad I waited, You need to live life a bit first, as you just dont have time for yourself for a long time after you have a baby, Your body is never quite as beautiful afterwards either.
Sign In or Register to comment.