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Flatmates from Hell

BillieTheBotBillieTheBot Posts: 8,721 Bot
in Sex & Relationships
Disaster tales here!
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My worst flatmate was a six foot two tall red-mohawk-haired alcoholic who would return home drunk out of his mind every other day. One time he knocked next door's giant 30'' framed picture off the wall of the entrance hall, I found him picking up the glass cutting all his fingers because he was so drunk. We left a note for the neighbours saying he would replace it; he never did.

    This guy would regularly wake me up by puking very loudly in the bathroom next door at 2am and I would often find him passed out in the morning, sometimes with a fag butt (complete with 1'' ash) in his hand balanced precariously over his cheap flammable seventies sofa.

    Sometimes there would be a pizza left in the oven all night, by now shrunken to a tiny charcoal disc.

    Sucha twat...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I once shared a flat with a goat!

    ‘nough said

    Bad Boy Pete
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    j9j9, you have won the price for worst flatmate from hell as far as I am concerned!

    There is no lower life form than the one who steals your chocolate!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru

    I once lived in a flat upstairs from a dodgy scouser who kept letting himself in to stash things in the communal loft.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by j9j9:
    Did anyone see the Jo Brand Flatmates from hell that was on BBC1 tonight?

    It was funny.

    i didn't see it but i did see the trailers for it. and boy would it be awful to have jo brand as a flatmate.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I once lived with someone who went out and shot pigeons and then left them in the fridge when I got home. He cooked them the next day! A right lazy slob...
    Love from the ChunkyMonkey
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How about sticking underwear on top of pasta, repeatedly stabbing fruit and juice cartons,eating you out of house and home and shoving dice up their arse. You should try living with that!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How about sticking underwear on top of pasta, repeatedly stabbing fruit and juice cartons,eating you out of house and home and shoving dice up their arse. You should try living with that!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by zoman:
    How about sticking underwear on top of pasta, repeatedly stabbing fruit and juice cartons,eating you out of house and home and shoving dice up their arse. You should try living with that!

    Perhaps you should be a bit nicer to your flat mate. What's wrong with underwear in pasta. You are clearly anally retentive and it is obvious to me that you are strangely obsessed with cleanliness. Your over-attention to hygiene has brought out the animal instincts in your flat mate. She is marking her territory in an attempt to eradicate the impersonal atmosphere create by yourself. Learn to share your home and she will reward you with her friendship. What's wrong with the odd smelly dice between friends?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    speaking of marking her territory, I forgot to mention that she also pees in potted plants when she can't get access to the bathroom, but hey, perhaps that's just me being a tad fussy
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    At the age of 20, two of my best mates got a house together, oh dear............
    the moved in the house in the november.
    by the december the kitchen was a disaster area worthy of a bio hazard notice!
    they cooked a turkey for xmas, and the carcass was there come easter!!!!
    the worst i think was when one of the guys ahd been cutting up speed on the video (the only flat surface in the house) when the other guy brought a girl home - a trainee police officer!!! they managed to convince her tha tit was caster sugar from a cae they had been cooking, and he had to put his week's worth of speed over a cake!!!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    At the age of 20, two of my best mates got a house together, oh dear............
    the moved in the house in the november.
    by the december the kitchen was a disaster area worthy of a bio hazard notice!
    they cooked a turkey for xmas, and the carcass was there come easter!!!!
    the worst i think was when one of the guys ahd been cutting up speed on the video (the only flat surface in the house) when the other guy brought a girl home - a trainee police officer!!! they managed to convince her tha tit was caster sugar from a cae they had been cooking, and he had to put his week's worth of speed over a cake!!!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by zoman:
    speaking of marking her territory, I forgot to mention that she also pees in potted plants when she can't get access to the bathroom, but hey, perhaps that's just me being a tad fussy

    You have an unhealthy interest in this person. Only a stalker would know how and where his victim peed. Move on pal - only Jack Russells sniff plants.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It would appear, "sikosue", that you have an unhealthy interest in replying only to my messages. Perhaps it is you who has the unhealthy obsessive lust for the perverse. After all, why call yourself sikosue( or is it Psycho sue?). Also I do not recall mentioning that I am a he, and that my flatmate is a she. Hang on, it's not you is it? Have I been rumbled. Oh my god it's time to lock up the dice again. She has hunted me down1 AAGHHHHH!!!!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    [I am found out. It is time to come clean. I love you baby! Will you take me with you ?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I spent a year in a house with someone who thought they were exceptionally tidy, and would come down like a tonne of bricks on anyone who so much as left a newspaper lying around.

    The thing is, she was actually really messy - I was always clearing up after her as I got in earlier each day. Only when she moved out did she discover that it wasn't the fairies doing the washing up. Her house was a tip last time I saw it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by sikosue:
    Perhaps you should be a bit nicer to your flat mate. What's wrong with underwear in pasta. You are clearly anally retentive and it is obvious to me that you are strangely obsessed with cleanliness. Your over-attention to hygiene has brought out the animal instincts in your flat mate. She is marking her territory in an attempt to eradicate the impersonal atmosphere create by yourself. Learn to share your home and she will reward you with her friendship. What's wrong with the odd smelly dice between friends?


    Basdicaly......
    I think I am in love. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt;


    Hello, I'm Sadie & I'll be your escort for the evening.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    whats a flatmate ?
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    someone you share a flat/apartment, or house with <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; (although that would technically be house mate i suppose)
    "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
    ~ Nietzsche
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