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Head Bake

The situation is:
One of my best mates has just gone on too Sweden. His girlfriend is also a mate and probably the person I trust most in the world. The thing is we were in the spa at another mates house and we sort of took things beyond being mates. All the other people in our social group know and it's got her paranoid. She's thinking of telling her bf as soon as he gets back (tomorrow).

Thing is shes admited to somone that she likes me but it's been awkward between us ever since. I don't want to lose her as my best mate but I also have some other feelings now. I've talked to her a couple of times when I'm real pissed but she hasn't given me any feedback. I don't regret it but at the same time I feel like a right **** . It's got me proper upset. I'm pissed at the mo and feeling really down. I like her but no way can I do this to my mate. They say mates come first but I can't help the way I feel. I can't talk to anyone coz they think I'm a **** so I thought I'd post about it on here. Arrghhhhhhhh!

- Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wow! god u must be feeling pretty shit, i kinda know how this girl feels (bin there done that) and i garantee she will be feeling shit, cos if her bf finds out he will most prob finish her and u have said u wouldnt go out with her cos ud feel 2 bad so she would b left with no 1.

    i think ur best bet is 4 u n her 2 meet up with no1 there and talk thru everything and decide wot u r gonna do,
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thing is mate I don't what I'd do if she split up with him coz I do like her. I've tried talking to her but I seem to do all the talking. I don't know how she feels now. I'm proper messed up. Cheers for replying. I've had some proper dodgy remarks from my other mates. Some understand but I still feel like shit! It's fucked up and confusing.

    - Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know it is confusing! but u gotta tell her strait i mean ur mate is back 2moro, and when he finds out, whichhe mite cos all ur other mates knowhe will go mad!!!!

    do u have yahoo or msn?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nope. Don't have either.

    I gonna have to sort my head out coz my mates back now and I'm yet to see him!

    - Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Seen him yet? Any news? Hope it worked out
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I went for a drink with him yesterday. I feel a bit better coz he pulled loads of girls on holiday. Still feel bad though coz I still like her but nothing can come of it.

    Time will sort it out.

    - Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive mate,

    Bad news to here and I understand exactly where your coming from and a piece of advice I was given was to never mix mates and girls as it just leads to trouble...

    Like you said, he pulled plenty on holiday which just proves how serious this relationship is (or isn't for that matter) only sad part is that all that'll go out the window cause of a trust point of view on your behalf...

    If he hasn't already been told then I think it'd be a good idea to let the cat out the bag cause from a mates point of view it'd be better to hear it from you rather than say a week or two later from her, honesty is always important betweem friends init... your relationship with the pair of them may go a bit rocky and that for a few days but you'll both pull through and gradually the trust barriers will build back up.

    As for the bird, hmmmmm, getting into a mates ex-bird is never easy and you don't know yet whether she will sort it back out or whether this will end the relationship.... I'd say for the moment which ever happens I'd hang fire, if they go out you don't really wanna be seeing her behind his back and if they split well, you don't wanna rush into things really quick as that'll damage the relationship with your mate.... Things could end up boiling down to a choice and choosing between mates and girls is never a nice option cause you'll never come out on top.

    Its tricky mate, thats about all the advice I can offer, good luck with what happens... <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Cheers Just.

    What you said has definately helped but I don't reckon I could tell him, I'd bottle it. I'm gonna have to do some thinking.

    - Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im liljo by the way skive! i was on the other side, i was seeing my bfs mate and i felt really shitty. its not nice 4 ne1 involved but wot justin said is all true (big up justin <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif">!!) so as u said u will just have 2 thinkbout things 4 a while

    no man is worth your tears, and the one who is wont make you cry....
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thing is I still like ger. It's more than just fabcing her aswell. In some ways she was more of a mate to me than ger bf.

    But I know nothing can happen. It's fucking me up. It' really is confusing!

    To everyone else it sosn't seem like much but to me it's all I can think about. I got ow one to talk to coz the more I go on about it the more my other mates will think I'm a twat. I think I lost a lot of trust from my mates who know what happened.

    Sorry if this is just waffle but at the moment I'm severely pisseed up and on a downer.

    - Skive <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/nogood.gif"&gt;

    Forward ever
    Backward never
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