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She thinks i'm ashamed..

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Okay so i've been seeing this really great gal for a little while now, and it has been going great. She's a fair bit older than me but she's okay with that, so that's not the issue. The thing is, we work together. Not directly, we have different jobs but we work at the same business. I have had other relationships screwed into the ground by work colleagues so I said i'd prefer it if we didn't advertise our relationship. I don't really mind all that much if people do find out about us, i'd just like as much privacy as we can get to start with. The thing is, she thinks that I am ashamed about her being my girlfriend and that's why I don't want people to find out. argh! I have tried to explain but she seems determined that she has the right idea. This is obviously extremely frustrating and i'm just trying to think of how to convince her that she is wrong.
I was very suprised when she told me her theory as she is normally a very confident gal.

phff....

okay thanks for 'listening', and advice is very welcome.

:(

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *Ponders* Hmmmmm this is a toughy! You could try making some big, public romatic gesture (it doesn't have to be at work) to ahow her you're not ashamed... like, sending her craploads of flowers to her door at a time when all her neighbours will notice. If that doesn't sound like your style, just try being more affectionate with her when you're together in public - as long as she knows you're willing to outwardly display your feelings for her to others, she should soon realise you're serious. This isn't very clear is it? Hope it helps, good luck!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe if you just popped in to see her in her department and just dropped in a line like "still okay for tonight?" or just something really casual. Then in a way you're acknowledging the fact that there's something there but you're not highlighting it in neon lights. Then leave your work colleagues to make up their own minds.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have you introduced her to your friends or family yet? If you haven't, doing this will show her you are not ashamed of those who you are closest to knowing.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanks for the advice guys, she has chilled out a bit now, i think the stress of her job was just getting to her.
    Everyone at work still thinks that we are just good mates tho, which is great, because sometimes when people are 'just mucking around' or 'just trying to help' fucks up a relationship..

    anyway thanks again
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