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(Mentions of suicidal ideation) Another regrettable and unhinged femcel rant

bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 32 Boards Initiate
in Health & Wellbeing

Just like my other post, I’m gonna regret it but I’m going fucking insane.

Why did god put in this fucking world just to be perceived as worthless by others. I am uncapable of finding love because god cursed me with my grotesque features that I can’t get rid of.


I know that those who have hurt me are fucking happy, and I just want to see them in person while I’m a fucking mess and say that I hope you’re fucking happy, because you have completely fucking broke me. You have ruined me as a person and there is no way in fixing myself. Not even therapy can help at this point. I am beyond fucked. You fucking win. Would you also prefer it if I killed myself, would that fully satisfy you?

I hope I get worse so then I can kill myself and satisfy them. I want to give those people complete satisfaction and kill my self. I want to leave a note with their full names and tell them that I hope my suicide finally satisfies them.
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Comments

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,073 Boards Champion
    Hey @bignosegirly0, thank you for sharing your experience with us here, it's not easy to be vulnerable about our feelings. I can hear how you're upset with your love experiences, and really hurt because of how others have treated you. I want you to know that you have value, that you do matter to us, and your worth isn't limited to your physical characteristics. It's okay not to feel okay, and we do appreciate having you as part of our community! <3

    As you've mentioned suicidal feelings, I'm sharing some support services that might be helpful. Like us, they have people who are willing to listen to what you have to say, because it matters, and you matter!
    Crisis Messenger (24/7) | text THEMIX to 85258
    Samaritans (24/7) | call 116 123 | email jo@samaritans.org
    Papyrus (2pm-midnight) | call 0800 068 41 41 | text 07786 209 697 | email pat@payrus-uk.org
    Supportline (hours vary) | call 01708 765 200
    Childline | call 0800 11 11
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Sian321Sian321 Moderator Posts: 94 Budding Regular
    edited 18:38
    Hey @bignosegirly0 , I just wanted to jump on here to say thank you so much for trusting us with this and your feelings.

    It sounds like there is so, so much hurt happening for you, and I'm so sorry that people have treated you wrongly. It sounds so painful to be coping with the impact of their actions.

    I got the sense you feel angry? And that is so, so valid. It's really natural to feel angry, even rage, when we're hurting sometimes, and I'm so glad you can express yourself here and that we can listen and support you. Would it feel helpful to talk a bit about the people who have hurt you and what this was like for you? Can I ask whether you've ever had the opportunity to explain to these people how much they've caused you pain? What would you want to say to them if you felt safe to do so? We're all here to listen and we care <3

    I want to echo what @Azziman has said above about reaching out for help if you do feel unsafe. We can hear things are serious right now and suicide is crossing your mind. There are places you can go for support in a crisis, and you don't have to walk through this alone.

    Kepe us updated. We're here <3
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