Does anyone else struggle with impulsivity

Amy22

Recently I feel like I struggle a lot with doing impulsive actions and do act before thinking and I hate this part of me. For example I do tend to post a lot of activist posts online and maybe that is the impulsive person in me because I just post without thinking. My parents recently told me that I need to think before I do which is true but I find it so hard because I tell them about what is happening in the world and its kind of like they don't agree with me maybe idk. Maybe I am just having a stupid silly moment again. I am not afraid to speak my mind sometimes but my mum said to be careful because it can come back to bite you in the end. I don't know why I am so impulsive. Sometimes i hate myself so so much I wish I could replace my brain and body so I could be right for once. I keep making too many mistakes as the time.

Former Member

I feel that! It's a scary feeling. Feeling out of control when in essence we're impulsive to feel in control! Quite ironic. Feel u 😍 sending love n strength 💪

Amy22

@Sindy Honestly I find it so hard like to control my impulsive thoughts and actions and I feel like I want to improve on it to be honest because I want to have more self-control in my life personally. Thank you so much @Sindy I really appreciate it .

Former Member

Running after trying to be in control won't help much. But slowly trying with each situation. It's really hard in the moment.
Tho I'll share an eg one of my impulsively actions were spending alot. Especially online...
So I put a spending weekly cap. And that's it. When it's gone it's gone...
Tho the root cause of it has to be dealt with.
The reason why u feel so out of control and what does the impulsive behaviours give u- because its filling a void.
So I would suggest getting to the root of it. Because otherwise it will just continue- and maybe get worse. With other behaviours. Not to scare u. Just to give u an understanding ❤️

Amy22

Thanks @Sindy I really appreciate I think it needs to be a slow gradual thing for me

Former Member

yes ! impulsivity is a tricky thing . I have trouble making decisions because i used to do most things on a whim, which did not gel well . Its easy to hate yourself because of it, as it can mess things around, but try to remember that you are not defined by your mistakes . i bet you would forgive / find peace with similar mistakes of others, try to hold yourself to that standard . you are just as human as everyone else .
I cant speak for how you form your own opinions, but as long as you are not oppressing anybody in doing so, you should be allowed to express them regardless of if theyre impulsive . its true that its good to think before you speak / post, but it is also important to allow room for mistakes when trying to manage impulse . everything takes practice !
(and if you ask me, expressing political opinions should be your own business, and not something that "comes back to bite you", but that is another story ! probably one written by orwell too)
take care !

Azziman

Hey @Amy22, thanks for creating this discussion - I'm sure it resonates with some in this community! Impulsivity is a scale - some people made decisions very quickly without time to think; others take a long time to make even simple decisions (often overthinking); and others are in between!

It's not inherently a bad thing - in some situations, it's quite helpful actually! So I wouldn't hate yourself for it. I think with impulsivity, the important thing is to recognise that there's pros and cons to it (just as with those on the other end of the scale), and that'll be what your parents are alluding to here. Over time, you experience more situations and learn where taking quick decisions is better, and where taking more time to think before deciding is better. I'd suggest having a think about situations where it's been helpful to act before thinking, and situations where it's caused issues.

A helpful tip that I've come across with impulsivity is for non-urgent decisions, you can defer the decision. So in this case, you see something you want to repost. It's not urgent to post, so instead you could save it. Perhaps later in the day, you could come back to it and see if you still want to post it. That way, you force yourself to give it a little time before taking action. How would you feel about trying this out?

Amy22

Thanks @Azziman and @slugchannel I really appreciate I think I am going to be think more carefully from now on wards