Poll of The Month

Laura_tigger82

Hey everyone!

Firstly, a warm welcome to all of our new community members, volunteers and staff team who will especially be helping us out during the festive period. Also, a huge thank you to all of you who are brave to open up on the community and supportive of each other. Where and who would we be if we didn't have all of you? Thank you for making The Mix's community the wonderful and supportive space it is.

Could you please select your favourite nomination from this month? This choice would be too tricky for us to do alone as mods!

The nominations are as follows:

@Dancer - What is your favourite festive drink from Costa?

The festive drinks are now back at Costa and I was wondering what everyone's favourite is.

@cc_ilaria - Neurodivergent Masking

Heya everyone! 😊

Let's chat about masking – something many of us neurodivergent folks deal with. It's tough living in a world that doesn't always get our brains. Growing up in a neurotypical setting can make you feel misunderstood, and sometimes people label you as "weird" or "strange." That pushes many of us to hide our true selves and act like everyone else just to "fit in."

But you know what? Constantly wearing this mask is exhausting. Trying to seem 'normal' just to shake off those labels takes a toll.

To my fellow neurodivergent friends reading this, you're awesome. We're all unique in our own way, and that's a good thing. 🫶 Don't let negativity define you. Your real, unmasked self is fantastic and deserves all the love in the world!

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*I started this thread to spread awareness and create a space for people to share their experiences, what works for them, and to feel more connected + understood. 💜*

Let's firstly start with, what is masking?

In neurodiversity, masking means hiding your neurodivergent traits to fit in with what people think is the 'norm'. It's about changing how you act, feel, or behave to avoid sticking out or getting judged. Masking might help deal with things, and can be a coping strategy for many but it can also make you feel really drained and like you're not being your authentic self.

Many people, especially those with autism and adhd, mask. People may make comments due to this such as "you don't seem neurodivergent" and do not understand the impact masking can have when you're out of the environment you've been masking in.

Personally for me, masking all day can lead to me feeling overstimulated, overwhelmed, disconnected from myself and mentally exhausted. Even after all of this masking is still something I feel I need to do. Not only because I was to fit in, but also because I have masked for so long.
What if people don't like the unmasked version of me? What if they think im faking it? I mean, I have been hiding under this mask for so long. Do I even know my true self?

It's hard, and can take time to unmask, learn yourself to accommodate to your needs and be your authentic self. But its so worth it

I wanted to share some things I've been doing, to unmask and things that have been helpful for me. It would be great if any of you feel comfortable sharing any things they have tried, or want to try also 💜
-Creating a safe space! When going somewhere new, I always plan out where I can go to calm down or a plan if I'm feeling overwhelmed. Instead of staying in that situation and making myself just "deal with it" I take myself out of the situation. For example, saying I need to step out and get some fresh air at a party.
-Not forcing eye contact. Something I have done for ages is forcing myself to make eye contact, even though it feels super uncomfortable for me and I dislike it so much! Recently I've not been making myself maintain it when I'm not comfortable doing so. If others comment I try explain this to them, that eye contact is something I struggle with. I'm not being rude
-Stimming! Stimming is awesome, helpful and can help so much with self regulating. It's not weird, it's not something that needs to be hidden. It's normal and totally okay to do (: happy stim awayyyy

(( Please do feel free to share any experiences you have, add onto this thread or share some reminders and messages for other neurodivergent humans here 🫂 it would be awesome to hear from you all! ))

I wanted to end with some reminders for all the lovely neurodivergent folk reading 🫶

♡ Your authetic self is awesome and deserves lots of love and care. 💜 You are just as important as everyone else!

♡ True friends appreciate you for who you are. They listen and get you.

♡ Be nice to yourself. Masking is tough, and unmasking after trying to fit in for so long is hard also. You're doing great.

♡ You're not alone; there are cool people who understand the struggle of masking. We're here for each other. 🌟

♡ It's always okay to ask for accommodations and accommodate yourself

Have a lovely day

@independent_ On On a Scale of 1-10 How are you Feeling Today?

I love when this thread gets bumped!!

I’m a 5 today

Why not higher: my brain is playing silly games and it just feels so messy. I can’t focus or concentrate (or is that the same thing) but either way. I can’t imagine anything of use getting done today.

Why not lower: I’m sure I’ve said this before but I have great family and great friends. Even if I let them all down sometimes with the way I do things.

What I can do: I’m gonna play some games I think. Something easy

Dancer

Hang on. I got nominated? Yay! Thank you to whoever that was.

Laura_tigger82

I could not possibly guess who that was... who is the anonymous elf?

Amy22

I dont know if I voted yet, is voting closed?. hang on I need to put my vote xd.

Amy22

Just put my vote in, also well done to everyone who got nomiated I really loved all of your posts so so much .

Laura_tigger82

Sorry everyone - been a particularly busy time of year! However, I can see some of you sneaked in last-minute votes so I am sure you'll be able to forgive me

The winner of the post of the month is @cc_ilaria with Neurodivergent Masking. My neurodivergent soul is really happy to keep seeing the neurodivergent posts win the poll of the month!

Well done to all of you for continuing to support each other and make The Mix's community the wonderful space it is - let's continue into 2024!

Amy22

Congrats @cc_ilaria I really liked your post a lot and well done on winning post of the month. Super proud of ya !!!!