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Not ok.

Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
in Health & Wellbeing
Struggling.
🦆💜🦆💜🦆

Comments

  • RenPRenP Posts: 203 Trailblazer
    Hey @Chloe234

    Thank you for sharing. I hope that by posting this one word, it was a form of release for you.

    If you are able to, do you think you could elaborate more on what you are struggling with, so we can help to support you?

    Keep going and take care of yourself <3
  • AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Hey @Chloe234 you must be so exhausted right now. Having overwhelming feelings of pain is awful at any time, but especially when you've been struggling for so long :( I can't imagine how draining this is for you. I really am grateful that you're continuing to post and I am 100% here if you want to talk some more about what's causing so much anguish at the minute <3
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  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    Thankyou @RenP and @AislingDM :) its hard tho cuz im struggling with everything. Im struggling with having my family down anf having to act ok for more people. Im struggling badly with my mental health but ive just gotta mask and hide it and i hate it. Im struggling with alot more too but i wont burden and go into that :disappointed: i feel numb but its not numb its painfull idk. Sorry
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • Amy22Amy22 Posts: 4,506 The Mix Elder
    Hi @Chloe234, I'm sorry to hear that you have been struggling with everything at the moment. I feel you when you mention about having to mask your emotions when your around people. I have gone through a similar experience and I still do now and then. I can imagine how hard it must be for you processing everything that has happened to you quite recently. Its understandable if you are feeling anxious, as you have gone through a lot. It can be hard when you mask your emotions as this cause can also make us feel more anxious. Sometimes, it can be a good idea to off load how we are feeling to a trusted person, as it can release all the worry from us. I know the feeling when you mention about reaching out to others. I been through this too and it can be hard talking to someone about how we feel, as we don't want to bother them with our thoughts. But sometimes that person will often be happy to hear how you are feeling, and they too would also want to help.

    Also, you don't have to apologise for how you are feeling Chloe, as it is totally understandable as it has been a very tough year for you with everything you have had to process. I know this might not be helpful, but if you ever need someone to talk to or when you feel ready to, you can always pm me anytime <3

    Sending hugs,

    Amy22 <3
    Just a person who likes pop culture and films
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    Thank you so much @Amy22 :heart::)
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • fiona333fiona333 Posts: 172 Helping Hand
    Hi @Chloe234 I know you posted this a few days ago, hope you are doing better now! So glad you were able to reach out, it can be so difficult to do so when struggling.

    We are always here for you! ❤️
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    Thankyou @fiona333 ❤️
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    I know you posted a while ago (apologies for not coming back for so long, I was away for a little while @Chloe234 !) but I just wanted to reaffirm what has already been said. Struggling itself is always exhausting, especially when it feels like there is no end in sight, let alone when you have to put on a fake smile and act like everything is hunky dory for family. It seems like being able to keep up this mask is really important to you, and I can certainly understand that <3

    I was wondering if you wanted to talk a bit more about what makes this so important for you? xx
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  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    Thankyou @AislingDM i wish i could but honestly drifting away and starting to shut myself away what ik isnt good so i dont think id be able to sorry
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey @Chloe234

    Just wanted to send you some hugs and let you know we are here for you :heart:

    How are you feeling?
                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

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  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    thankyou @Stephanie

    im really really struggling but i feel like im starting to get so bad that i cant even access support without fighting myself. Im starting to drift away and loose myself again. One of my friends passed away recently as well :disappointed: this year is awful :cry: idk im finding everything hard
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • Lucy307Lucy307 Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Hi @Chloe234 I'm sorry to hear you’re in so much pain. I hear you that you’re struggling to access support without fighting yourself - can you talk a bit more about this, do you have a support network / strategies but can’t bring yourself to contact or act on them?

    I’m so so sorry to hear about one of your friends passing recently too. Have you been able to seek support for this? Sounds like an incredibly tough time for you at the moment but we are here for you. 💜

    Lucy
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
  • Chloe234Chloe234 Community Champion Posts: 3,172 Boards Guru
    Thankyou @Lucy307 i do have a couple strategies i used to use but now ive completely ditched them and usually im on here abd the groups reaching out way more than i do now and im usually way more active here too but thats all slowly stopping

    i havent no but i think its all just hitting me after loosing my stepmum in march, cat in april, nan in july and now my friend.

    It is really tough but im trying to stay strong for my fanily

    Thanks again,
    Chloe
    🦆💜🦆💜🦆
  • AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Completely, @Chloe234 , definitely do not want to pressure you to talk before you feel ready. Especially because when you are trying to hold things together for everyone else around you (like your family) the mask of happiness/strength can break so easily when you're pushed to open up :(

    Suffering so much grief and loss in such a short period of time is simply the definition of devastating, it changes the entire way you live your life, and even when some time has passed, it's like it all piles up and comes crashing down at the most random points, leaving you feeling quite broken, right?

    When all of this, and the world, is weighing down on you, coping strategies do begin to slip away, sometimes it's slow or sometimes it's very fast. But, when we are in the throes of agony it can be a challenge to even come on here to talk I think (which is why I'm super grateful that you continue to talk to us so much <3). It would be amazing if you could give yourself some space and time to just not be okay, which sounds horribly daunting, and not fun at all, but when the worst things in the world happen to you, sometimes forcing yourself to move past it can make things worse. As you say, you are such a strong person and you want to look after others, which is immensely compassionate. Nevertheless, you deserve to be supported to, and in whatever capacity you need that, we will be here, huge well done just for talking right now xxx
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